Page 18 of Cry For You

Shay, I need to go; I just pulled up in front of the school. See, all is fine. No need for you to rush down here. All right, bye.”

I take a very needed deep breath, put the jeep in park, and get out. Doesn’t matter if I see him or not. It doesn’t matter at all.

Who am I kidding? It matters. It always mattered. I can’t help it.

As soon as I walk onto the school grounds, with all the other parents and kids running around, I see Jacob’s teacher. She’s keeping an eye on a small group of her students that are playing a few feet away from her, with a teacher’s aide I met when school started. Average height, good looking, seemed nice enough, but sometimes you just don’t know…

“Hi, Mom!” Jacob yells my name across the yard, steering my thoughts into a different direction. I smile, waving at him as he chases—who else— Jackson around.

Oh, boy. I hope his parents get here after I leave. He seems like a really nice kid, but their friendship, as innocent as it is, makes things so much more complex and tied together than they need to be. Especially now, when things in our lives were closer to normal than they have been in years. But how can I deny him this friend he’s made? Watching him laugh, running around, carefree, with all the other kids his age. The way he should be, with no fear of the past that he has no idea about. When he turns back around, I call his name, waving him over.

Both of them run over at full speed, as if they don’t intend to stop but will run me over. I smile when they screech to a halt, out of breath, their little chests rapidly rising and falling. “Mom, can I play a little longer? Please, please, please, mom?”

“Can he please, please, please, Jacob’s mom?”

Jackson pleads with his friend, a look on his face so similar to one his father used to make. Coupled with Jacob’s signature Mom-you-know-you-want-to-give-in-because-I’m-that-adorable face, I have to force myself to shake my head.

“Sorry, guys, maybe next time. Jacob, we really need to get going. Grandma’s not home, and I have a lot to do.” I’m grasping at straws, but hey, it’s all I’ve got. Unless I want to run into his father or mother. I don’t know which one would be worse. Their little faces fall. I feel a little guilty for ruining their fun. I almost give in to five more minutes when I hear my name.

“Ms. McQueen.”

Mrs. Pear, Jacob’s teacher, is waving at me, and the person I’m trying to elude is standing next to her, looking emotionless. My lungs expand with the maximum capacity of air allowed.

I have no luck. But I can do this. I’m not seventeen. He’s no longer the love of my life. He’s just a man. As long as I remember this, it’ll be fine. I’ll be fine. I get my breathing under control, put a serene smile on my face. “All right, guys, looks like your teacher bought you five more minutes.” They yell in triumph and run off. “Stay with Mr. Drake! We’re not staying long, Jacob.”

I walk over, trying not to look at the other person standing next to her. Instead, I focus on Mrs. Pear, noting not for the first time how young she is—maybe a few years older than me— with her medium-length brown hair pulled back to the side with a clip. Her welcoming, friendly smile goes nicely with her blue, flower-patterned dress, both of which fit her personality. “Afternoon, Mrs. Pear.”

“It’s nice to see you, Ms. McQueen. I usually see Jacob’s grandmother in the afternoons.”

“I’ve changed around my work schedule for the next three weeks. My mother went away on a trip with her church. You’re stuck with me twice a day.”

“You’re much too pleasant a person for me to consider it being stuck. There could be worse things, and, just between us, parents,” she says in a conspiratorial voice, “you’re two of my favorite parents. One of the reasons I’m happy to bring you two together.”

“What?” Landon says, mirroring my thoughts of uneasy shock. Our eyes collide then turn on her.

“This is why I needed to speak to both of you.” She smiles. “It’s perfect timing with your schedule change.”

“What is?” I ask with a foreboding uneasiness setting deep within.

“Every year the school has a pet project. We have five classes, and each class adopts a pet from the local animal shelter until the end of the school year—to teach the kids responsibility, empathy, caring for the animal, and teamwork. The children will work in groups of two for four weeks. Every four weeks another group gets a turn. Each child has picked a partner to work with. And guess whose group is up first?”

“Let me guess,” Landon says. “Our sons are up first.”

“Yes, they are.” Mrs. Pear smiles. “They all but demanded they be partners. I usually pick partners, but, I’ve never had a more energetic request from two students. Of course, I had to say yes. I love to see young minds so enthusiastic about learning.”

“Demanding doesn’t sound much like Jacob,” I say.

“I’m sure the more demanding of the two was Jackson. He can be persuasive when he puts his mind to it,” Landon says to her. He sounds amused, but I wouldn’t know. I’m trying my hardest not to look.

“Come to think of it, he was. They make an entertaining pair,” she says with a light laugh. “Our class is the rabbit class. The boys will take turns taking care of their temporary house guest. Because they’re the first group, they have the privilege of assigning names. Isn’t this exciting?” She clasps her hands together.

“Exciting,” I repeat with less enthusiasm.

She raises her hand, waving the boys over. I place Jacob in front of me, hands on his shoulders, and look at Jackson standing next to his father. Father and son. The resemblance is definitely there. Dark hair, dark eyes, that gives way to an understanding and light you’ll only know if you’re able to get close enough to know, and when they smile, a slight shadow of a dimple may appear. You look away too quickly and you’ll miss it, like so many other things about him I once loved. I realize Landon’s looking at me eye to eye, in a way no one has looked at me in a long time. I jerk my eyes away quickly, realizing I’ve looked too long. Not good.

“Boys, I was telling your parents about the project you’ll be working on together.”

“Yeah, Mom, it’s going to be great!”

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