Page 115 of Withered

He smirks and puts his arm around Kristy’s. “Sure. I never said Jake.”

I groan and put my head down on the table.This is so not me.

“I have practice today. Saturday is the first game of the season.” Tyler tells us and adds, “Coach is killing us with his exercise routine and game plans.”

“Shouldn’t Jake be here then? For practice?” I ask.

Kristy gives me a look. “You sure care a bit too much for someone you wish to ignore.”

“I was just asking,” I murmur, and they chuckle.

Many thoughts run through my mind, but I can’t pinpoint anything particular.Where did he go?

We drop Kristy off at her next class before heading to English. Rumors about Jake and me have cooled down, but they are still out there.

“Why are you giving my friend a hard time?” Tyler asks as we take our seats.

“Your friend needs to clear his thoughts. He can’t keep confusing me. Either I matter or I don’t,” I tell him honestly.

“Remember when I asked you about Kristy?” Tyler asks me, and I nod.

Tyler starts, “I know I’m not the right person to say this, other than Jake’s friend. But please, he’s been through a lot.”

“I know. He told me about Jennifer as well as his parent’s divorce. We even went to meet his dad,” I tell him.

“Wow. If he told you that much, you must be special to him,” Tyler says, and my mind wanders back to when Jake said the same thing to me.

Tyler looks at me intensely and says, “Listen. I get it; he is confusing you. But think from his point of view. If this is all new to you, it’s new for him too. He is confused, as he doesn’t know what to do. Up until this point, all he had done was play around with girls. With you, things are different.

“He’s like a deserted garden,” he says as I reflect on his remarks. “If you want to plant something, make sure it has plenty of water and sunlight.”

His words make sense, but Jake needs to tell me what he wants. If he doesn’t try, my efforts will be wasted. I give Tyler a tight smile and remain silent for most of the class.

Chemistry class is a bunch of crap. My mind is full of Jake’s and Tyler’s words, and the other part is Kristy screaming at me to ignore him.

I wish I could talk to Jake again. Just once.

I wish I could explain to him why his forest-green eyes are so enchanting.

How his voice, with its British accent, impacts me. How beautifully my name glides off his tongue!

How I miss his smirks. How his smile makes my heart skip a beat.

How much I miss him and how much his kisses make me weak.

I wish I could tell him how alive he makes me feel and how lost I am without him.

Returning home, I take a relaxing bath. Jake’s windows are closed, and I don't see him for the rest of the day. I hope he arrived on time; otherwise, he will face Coach’s wrath.

Once I’m done with work, I try to call him, but his phone goes straight to voicemail. So I text him.

Me:Call me or meet me when you get home.

I’ve spent my entire life between the folded pages of books, in the absence of actual human relationships. I developed bonds with the characters in the books. I felt their love and mourned with them when they lost someone. Those characters were more real than the people themselves. I spend my days daydreaming about love like theirs.

It’s time for me to stop and accept the actual world is much different and harder.

Ieat,finishsomeschoolwork, and about to go to bed when a text message flashes on my screen. I quickly hurry out of bed, hoping for Jake’s reply.