Page 94 of Menace

I started laughing and he did as well.

“Lordy, I needed that laugh.” As soon as I said it I realised what I had done.

Damn. I closed my eyes and breathed out slowly, hoping he wouldn’t latch on to my slip.

No such luck.

“What’s wrong? Are you and Ry okay?”

I rushed to reassure him before this got bigger than I wanted it to be.

“Nothing is wrong, not really. I read until late and my sleep was crappy because Ry was being a little bugger. He kept on waking up and was crying and fussy. I fell asleep about an hour ago and you woke me up so now I’m grumpy. I hate waking up grumpy because it always seem to last the entire day.”

Mark is such a good guy, he rushed to try and make me feel better.

“Tell you what. You go back to bed and I’ll have your favourite munchies delivered in about two hours or so. Take a day for yourself and Ry and just relax. Ink, Killian and I have shit in hand this side so don’t give it another thought.”

Such a good guy.

“Thanks Mark, you’re a sweetheart.”

“Talk later, Harp.”

And then he was gone.

I went to the bathroom used it then washed my face and brushed my teeth. I was wide awake and knew I wouldn’t be going back to sleep. Back in my room I checked on Ry then opened my curtains and let the early morning sun flood the room. My boy was a deep sleeper and light and noise didn’t wake him.

I wasn’t going to remake my bed but I did pull the bedclothes straight, fluffed the pillows and stacked them against the headboard.

Only then did I get back into bed.

Sitting up against the pillows I checked my messages on my phone. It was stupid because I knew there would be nothing from Lucky.

Every single scenario of why he had ghosted me went through my head. From club business to a broken phone to a lost phone to something else prohibiting him from replying to my texts.

And then it hit me.

I was making excuses for him.

No, just no. It had to stop.

I had learned very early in my life not to put my trust in a man. They were not to be trusted with your life or your heart.

With Lucky I had let my guard down, letting him in and now I was suffering because of it. It would have been better to have kept our interactions friendly while letting him get used to the idea that Ry was his.

Damn, I screwed up.

Twirling my phone in my hands I remembered his words when he was with me. He had seemed so sincere with the way he had reacted.

I had believed him but now I had to take his silence as his way of letting me know he didn’t believe Ry was his.

It hurt, so badly but angered me at the same time.

As always I talked myself through it, through the anger and the hurt.

“Get real, bitch, you don’t know the man at all. Hanging out while he was on holiday doesn’t count as it wasn’t just the two of you. You had two nights, make that three now, with him. It does not make a relationship. It was a short interlude that led to a baby, that’s all. He’s not into you. Suck it up and move on. Accept that you’ll be raising Ry on your own.” I muttered angrily.

Lying back against the cushions I looked out at the early morning outside my window, then glanced back at my sleeping angel. For the first time since I arrived in Savannah I felt completely alone. I was alone in a strange country with a very young baby.

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