Page 1 of Menace

ONE

Joney August

Cape Town, South Africa

Memories are funny things, they invade your thoughts when you least expect it. Making you ache with emotions you’d rather not feel.

It happened every time I remembered the two best nights of my life. Sometimes it happened while I was at work but other times it came to me in my dreams.

That was the worst.

Waking up and finding I was alone. Realising it had been a dream.

I’d never see him again, never hold him again. I would never feel him inside me again.

I had given him my word I wouldn’t reach out so all I could do was visit him in my dreams. I cherished our time together and kept it close to my heart. Keeping the memories alive.

Closing my eyes I relived our last moments on the beach.

“Merci boucoup (Many thanks) for the most amazin’ night of my life, ‘tite chatte (little cat). I’m not just sayin’ that. It’s the truth.” He was quiet for a beat. “I wish I was a different man, a man who could give you the home and babies you deserve. But I’m not. I’m only half a man, and the half that’s left is no good for you. He’s a monster. I truly wish I had more to give. I do. If I did I would give it to you, no one else, Jo-Jo.”

I couldn’t help the tears that filled my eyes and silently ran down my cheeks. I was so sad for him, and for me.

Shaking his head he wiped them away with his thumbs. “‘tite chatte, casse pas mon coeur. (Little cat, don’t break my heart). What little I have left of it. Je suis désolé (I am sorry).” He whispered.

I don’t know what he said but as soon as he did he changed.

He pushed me away and I could see him closing down. It was almost as if a steel wall slid down between us.

Even his accent wasn’t as pronounced.

“I won’t call or text or answer any calls or texts from you. When I leave it will be the end of what we shared here between us. Do you understand?” He wasn’t being nasty at all. He was being honest.

What could I say or do but agree.

“I understand, Monster man.” I teased before turning serious.

“I won’t call or text, you have my word.”

I gave him my word without a second thought.

Opening my eyes I winced at how easily I had done that. As if what we had shared hadn’t been life changing for me, and I suspect the same had been true for him.

I shook my head determined to shake the memories off. I had given my word and that was that.

He had given me two nights I would remember for the rest of my life. Nights no other man would ever be able to replicate or erase from my mind.

Not that I had tried to replicate or erase them.

I had changed who I used to be.

My transformation had started because of something my new best friend had said to me. Rider started off not liking me but we became friends, more than just friends, we were best friends.

Shortly before Pixie’s wedding I had turned over a new leaf, became a new me. Someone I was learning to respect. I was proudly celibate and I let anyone who asked know about it.

Joney August was no longer available for a quick fuck. The door to my kitty was closed, indefinitely.

And then he happened.

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