Page 38 of Stepping Up to the Plate

I push her back against the door and lean down crowding her until we are eye to eye. “Let’s get a few things straight right now, doll. You are and always will be enough for me. There is no kinky fuckery I am missing out on. Vanilla is A-OK with me. Are there some things I want to explore with you? Absolutely. But that is as much for you as it is me.

“If you told me you only wanted to have missionary for the rest of our lives, I would be grateful to be the one getting you to make you scream. I don’t go to the club to play. I go there to meet with my partners – business partners,” I correct quickly. “Nothing else.”

“You were there for a meeting the nightwemet,” she accuses.

“You’re right. I was. And that was the last time I played at the club. I haven’t touched anyone but you since that night. I didn’t actually touch you that night, so it’s been even longer.”

“You haven’t been with anyone else since you met me?” she asks, softening.

“No,” I reply.

“And you don’t play with anyone when you’ve been at the club?”

“Absolutely not.”

“How many times?”

“How many times what?”

“How many times have you been to the club and not told me? If ‘communication and honesty are the cornerstone of a relationship,’ why is this the first I’m hearing about this?”

Shit. She’s right. I should have told her. I’ve only been back once since she and I got together but I didn’t tell her. I thought about it, but I didn’t want to bring up any bad memories when things were going well.

“Once before we started dating and once after,” I answer.

“And you didn’t touch anyone?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Did you watch anyone?”

“Watch?”

“Did you watch anyone else play?”

I rub my thumb across her cheeks. “No. I didn’t watch any scenes, I didn’t even go into the private areas. I went to Cole’s office and left. That’s it. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to upset you, but I realize now that was wrong. I won’t go again without telling you. Hell, I’ll take you with me if you want.”

“You will?” she asks, surprised.

“Of course. You may be bored in the meeting but I’ll take you if you want.”

“Would you want to play when we were there?”

“Wouldyou?”

She shrugs. While the idea of playing with her gets my blood flowing, I don’t think she’s ready to be exposed to that environment with the newness of our relationship. Clearly things aren’t as settled as I thought they were if she’s asking these types of questions. I make the offer nonetheless. “Baby, if you want to go play, I’ll take you right now, tomorrow, next week, whenever you want.”

“I don’t want to go right now,” she replies quickly. “I want to be enough for you. I know I don’t have as much experience as you’re used to, but I can try to be what you like.”

“You are enough for me. Youarewhat I like. Always. But if you want to explore some different sides of your sexuality you haven’t before, I am happy to explore them with you. Just know, I am also equally happy with you moaning my name at home as at the club.”

“If we went, would you want to share me or see me with other men?”

“Hard no. You are mine and mine alone. I don’t want other men to see your body or hear your whimpers, let alone be a part of them.”

She then has the nerve to giggle, “Yours, huh?”

“For all intents and purposes, yes. You are mine. Are you laughing at my claim?” I ask in mock offense. “Because I have no problem reminding you who owns your pleasure.”

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