Page 56 of Snowed In with My Best Friend's Dad

"Hey," Lindsay said, standing up and putting her magazine aside. She walked over to the side of my bed. "How are you feeling?" She was being sweet like she normally was, and at the same time, there was something in her expression that told me something was up.

"Am I going to be alright?" I had a vague recollection of being told that me and the baby were okay, but maybe that was a dream.

"Yes. You and the baby are fine. There's a couple of things that the doctors will monitor, but they seem to think they aren't that big a deal."

I nodded.

She studied me, her expression turning more serious. “Were you ever going to tell me, Mira?"

I could try to pretend that I didn't know what she was talking about, but it was bad enough that I had kept something important from her. Why insult her by continuing to pretend? "Did your dad talk to you?"

"He seems to think he's the father of your baby. On the one hand, I'm completely shocked that you would have slept with my father. But I also know that my father wouldn't lie about that. And since I can't imagine your sleeping around, I suspect that maybe he's right. Then again, I didn't think you'd sleep with my father, so maybe you are sleeping around."

Studying her, my impression was that she was more hurt than anything that I had betrayed her. She didn't seem particularly angry.

"I didn't know who he was—"

She held up a hand to stop me. "He gave me all the disturbing details. And I'll be honest, Mira, you two hooking up without knowing who each other was, that I can deal with. But after that? At the cabin? That feels really weird to me."

I nodded. "I know. I'm sorry."

Her eyes narrowed. "I still don't see how it could have happened. You've always seemed so focused on school. You hardly ever went out, and when you did, you never spent time with men. I don't understand how you'd hook up with a total stranger and then continue to do it even knowing he was my father."

I looked down, not sure how to explain it to her. To be honest, I didn't completely understand it, especially since it turned out Brett could be so cruel. "I don't know. We ran into each other, and initially, I didn't like him and yet he invited me for a drink. We talked, and I don't know, I just felt something and decided for once, I would go with it. It was the same at the cabin. Initially, we were butting heads and I was trying to avoid him, and then all of a sudden, we weren't. It was almost like I was outside myself. I was away from school and all the stress and everything, and I just wanted to be different. And to answer your question, although I'm ashamed to admit it, I hadn't planned to tell you. We agreed that we wouldn't. We figured once we got home, we were back to our old lives, and what happened was gone in the past."

"But then, you found that you are pregnant. That's why you left, right?"

I nodded.

Anger flashed in her eyes, an unusual sight from Lindsay. "You were going to keep the baby from my father."

Her accusation made me think that Brett hadn’t told her everything. "The last time I saw your father, he told me to stay away from him."

She sighed. "He told me all about that. The guy is beating himself up with guilt over the way he treated you, but even so, he doesn't deserve to miss out on his child, or his child to miss out on having him as a father. I know my father can be a jerk, but he's a good father. And considering your dad is worried about paying an ambulance bill, my father can provide financial support that you and your child need."

My own anger flared, but I tried to tamp down on it, knowing that she was right. "I did try to see him," I said, feeling I needed to defend myself. "I went to his office, but his secretary looked at me and treated me like I was lower than pond scum. She said he was out, and after I left, I saw you go into the building and you stayed there, so he had to have been there."

"So you just gave up?"

"I suppose I did, but then he showed up on my doorstep saying things." I wanted to tell her just how awful her father could be. At the same time, I wanted to protect her from it. She loved her father.

"He hates himself for that." She shook her head, letting out a humorless laugh. “My father has been immune to women ever since he and my mother divorced. But there's something about you, apparently."

I had no idea what she meant, so I didn't respond.

"I think my father's half in love with you, but because he can't deal with it, because it makes him feel out of control, he takes it out on you. I'm not saying that it's right that he did that. I’m just trying to explain."

Even without explanation, I knew there was no future for me and Brett. Even with the secret out and Lindsay dealing with it as well as she was, there was no way I could put me and my child in a position to have Brett's vitriol spewed on us whenever he felt he couldn't manage his feelings. There were a lot of things Brett and I needed to figure out if he was going to be in my baby's life, and the idea of having to co-parent increased my stress. He had money and power and influence, all things he could use to take the child from me. But I didn't feel that this was a fear I could share with Lindsay.

"Maybe we shouldn't talk about this now. You need to rest. The doctor says that you will be able to go home if the next check-in goes well. Your dad has gone home to get the car so that when you’re discharged, he can take you home. In the meantime, my father has arranged for whatever healthcare that you need while you're here, and any aftercare."

My agitation increased. "I don't need—"

"This isn't just about you, Mira. I get it. You're angry at my father for being a jerk, but he is the baby's father. He has a right and a responsibility to make sure you two have the best care.”

A few hours later, my doctor gave me the okay to go home. My only discharge instructions were to rest for the next week and not have intercourse, like that was going to be an issue. I’d have to call my student-teacher placement to let them know, but I hoped that rest just meant being in bed. I could take my courses and do my homework from there.

I was beyond relieved that the baby was fine and there didn't seem to be a serious concern about the pregnancy. At the same time, I was agitated at Brett's appearance earlier and Lindsay's seeming lack of concern about the fact that I slept with her father. In fact, her biggest concern seemed to be that I didn't want anything to do with him.

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