Page 53 of Jinxed

“Well…” I push strands of hair off her face and slide them behind her ear.Walk away, Drake Banks. Get the fuck out of this shower and walk.

But is that what I do?

“If you saw yourself the way I see you, you’d know you’re the whole ocean, Little Bird. And the sky you fly in. And the earth you control. You’re the wind I feel on my skin. And the sun that prickles on my arms when we step outside. You’re the air in my lungs,” I push on, knowing I’m breaking all the rules of protecting a witness by telling her this. “I swear to Christ, Rory, if Vallejo gets you and I don’t stop him, then you’re the death I won’t survive.”

“But why?” she whines, tears streaming from her eyes. “You don’t even know me. I’m a friggin’ nobody, Drake. A tiny speck in this universe no one cares to know. And soon, I’ll be a nobody with no family left.” She reaches up and wraps her hands around my wrists. “The smart thing for you to do would be to wonder what’s wrong with me. Why am I twenty-one and have no one in my life? That’s a million red flags if I ever saw them.”

“And yet,” I stroke her cheek and know, if Malone or anyone else saw me, they’d kick me off this case faster than I could take a breath and fill my lungs. “An entire firehouse checked in on you while you were in surgery last year because they cared about you. Lieutenant Matteo Ruiz, the firefighter who pulled you off that cliff, sat in your hospital room all day and half the night, just to watch over you. The chief of police texts me a dozen times a day now that I’m in Copeland, wanting to know that you’re okay. The hospital staff worked with Malone and Fletcher today to get you in to see your mom. They moved heaven and earth, and a sickly woman, just so you could have that time. They locked down an entire fucking hospital for you, Rory. Just because your dad is a piece of shit, and just because your pussy-ass ex-boyfriend is a piece of shit, doesn’t meanyou’rea piece of shit.”

I slide my tongue forward to suckle the drops of water from my lips. I don’t mean for it to be anything more than that. I definitely don’t expect her to notice. But when her eyes drop to the movement and her lips roll between her teeth, my cock twitches in my jeans and begs for something I can’t have.

I can never have.

But fuck if my body will tell me no.

“It says I’m a loser,” she rasps, nibbling on her bottom lip like she knows the action tempts me. Like she knows it sends me wild with need. “It says I make poor choices.”

“It says you take in strays,” I tease, edging closer, though I know I shouldn’t. Our faces rest six-inches apart. So close, and yet, an eternity apart. “It says you take in those who don’t deserve you. And instead of placing blame where blame belongs in the laps of assholes, you internalize it.”

“Drake…”

“Those are your daddy issues,” I joke, smiling. Which only makes her eyes drop to the movement again. “He was always too stupid and too fucked up to love you the way you deserved. So now you have that ‘love me’ energy some girls get when they’re deprived.”

“Red flags,” she rasps, tightening her hold on my wrists. “Pick me girlsare the worst.”

“Only the annoying, toxic kind. You, though…”Walk away, Drake Banks! Run away before it’s too late. “You’re not those kind, Little Bird. Not even close.”

Fuck me. Fuck her. Fuck everything, dammit. Because her eyes flutter closed and her body inches closer to mine. She holds my wrists like she’s afraid of falling, and when we’re just an inch apart, she puckers her lips and makes the softest, sweetest, sexiest sound in the back of her throat. My cock strains painfully in my jeans, and my heart thunders in my chest.

My mind screams,yes fucking please.Let me have you. Let me keep you. But my training has me turning my face just as her lips make contact. Her eyes whip open in stunned disbelief. Her vulnerability, making way for rage. And humiliation. And horror.

I close my eyes and drop my head. Because I know, I just made a huge mistake, and yet, kissing her would have been a mistake, too. Taking her in this shower, a mistake. Taking possession of this beautiful—defenseless—woman, a mistake. “I’m sorry.” I open my eyes and study the drain instead of meeting her gaze. “I can’t do that.”

“Oh my god.” She yanks back like I’ve punched her in the face. Her hands coming up to cover her mouth. Her eyes firing with a potent mix of mortification andI’m gonna kill yourage. “Oh my god.”

“Don’t—”

“I’m so fucking dumb.” She shoves up to stand and slaps the shower off so the water stops and an icy chill settles deep in my bones.

She still wears her jeans. Her shoes. Her socks and underwear.

Her long hair dangles to tickle her elbows, and her eyes burn as she looks down at me on my knees. She’s a fucking goddess, and I gladly bow down at her feet.

But not like this. Not when she’s scared and embarrassed.

“Forget this happened.” She shoves the shower door open and limps out on wet tile that threatens to send her sprawling. But she snatches up a dry towel and presses it to her face. Her shoulders bow, and a fiery blush colors her chest and neck. Just an iota beneath the surface of rage sits a girl mortified, but she clings to her anger and tears the towel from her face with jerky movements.

Sniffling, though that sound is angry too, she scrubs the towel over her hair to collect the dripping moisture before wrapping it around her torso and opening the bathroom door.

I sit back on my haunches and breathe. My cock settles once more, my hormones back under control. A million tiny paper cuts of regret sting all over my body as the woman I’m supposed to protect is now alone. In the hall. In her room. She’s safe, and we can both afford a minute of separation. But fuck, the fact we’re apart now is exactly the reason I can’t cross that line and be with her.

When emotions mix and I have to protect her from a man who wants her dead, shit gets messed up. Blind spots grow larger, and my ability to do what needs to be done for her becomes more difficult.

I need to focus, and obsessing over her tight frame, wrapped in loose jeans and oversized hoodies, is not how I do that.

But breaking her heart? Humiliating her?

“Fuck.”

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