Page 70 of Red Hunt

“But.”

“Yes, lovely?”

“Don’t you want to know what happened?”

“Do you want to tell me?” Between the video and her x-rays, I could pretty much draw my own conclusions. Abused, molested…she’d probably lived through unimaginable horrors and came out this incredible woman.

It needed a very special kind of strength to not only survive but thrive after this kind of childhood.

Milli wiped away her tears and sniffed. She looked deep into my eyes.

And I was waiting. Waiting for her decision. For her story, if she wanted to tell it. I would listen. Everything inside me was roaring with the idea of going there. Of listening to all the things that happened to her. But listening I would. And it wouldn’t change a damn thing. Not how I saw her and not my feelings.

“You can tell me. But you need to know it won’t change anything. Not the way I look at you. Not the way I feel about you. Not the way I think about you.

“You sure?”

“Hundred percent.”

“You can’t be sure.”

“Trust me, I am.”

“Hmmm.”

Oh boy. I grabbed her off the sofa and dragged her into my lap in one swift motion that almost cost me my balance.

“Listen to me.” I tucked her head under my chin. Maybe looking her in the eyes would’ve been a better choice, but even that would mean needing distance, and right now, distance wasn’t an option. “You’re not damaged. You’re strong and immensely talented. You’ve taken my breath away, and since I met you, all I want is to spend as much time with you, be as near to you as you’re willing to let me. You survived something horrible, and despite that, you’re kind and funny and your friends love you. You are not damaged, Milli. You’re amazing, and your trust is a gift. Don’t ever think I take that lightly. And don’t ever think that now that I have you, I’d be dumb enough to ever let you go again. You’re it for me. This is it for me.”

My heartbeat started to race, and my lungs burned like I hadn’t experienced since water-confidence training. Wow. I did not expect that last part. Did I really feel this way? Was she really it? Was a relationship, a family what I wanted in my life? It rang true. But even thinking about it freaked me out.

She’d caught my attention from the start. I’d never felt more protective of anyone before her, ever. I’d been drawn to her even though all I wanted was solitude. Even though having her in my life caused trouble, stirred unwanted feelings, and made me question the path I was on. My priority had been on SOG for so long, all in, all the time with the mission. Family? Love? Weren’t even a factor. And now? Was I ready to risk the life I’d built for a shot at…love? Was I falling in love with her? Was this really it for me?

Shit. What about my plans? What about my peace?

And why was breathing suddenly impossible?

42

MILLI

I looked at myself in the mirror dressed in a revealing black dress, my makeup heavy, my hair slicked back. My eyelashes were impossibly long with the heavy touch of mascara Belinda had put on me. I couldn’t believe what I’d gotten myself roped into. Couldn’t believe I was doing this.

“You’re it for me. This is it for me.” The words coming out of Max’s mouth had haunted me these last few days. Well, not so much the words, but more the expression of utter horror on his face after he’d put me back on the sofa. He’d looked shocked, pained even. And then he’d pulled back. His face had turned blank, his demeanor stony. And then he’d just left. Without another word. Just like that. His actions had contradicted his words completely. Regret had been written all over his features. Did he regret saying those words to me? He probably regretted sleeping with me, as well. Why else would he just leave and disappear from my life as if he’d never even existed? But why did he say those things if he didn’t mean them?

I shook my head and turned away from the mirror.

I didn’t care.

It wasn’t as if I’d missed him or anything…at least not too much.

And I didn’t have time for stuff like that anyways. Didn’t have time because shit hit the fan mere hours after he’d left.

Shit that had me on edge for days. Had me questioning everything, including my sanity, for days. Had me roped into yet another one of Belinda’s harebrained plans. A plan that had me and Belinda all dolled up in her apartment.

Except this plan was stupid and probably dangerous. And one I definitely wouldn’t have agreed to, if the whole Max situation hadn’t sent me off the deep end.

“We’ll just stay for half an hour at each venue and move on. Find out if it’s the right spot. If something shady is going on, we’ll call in the cavalry and hoof it. Do you have your tracker?” Belinda turned around and looked at herself in the mirror. She was dressed in a similar outfit to mine, only a bit sexier and a lot more revealing. Thank God I wasn’t wearing that.

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