Page 16 of Red Hunt

“No trouble, no drama. Got the message loud and clear, doc.” I appreciated that. I liked how he was looking out for her. Liked to know she wasn’t alone. But he’d gotten the wrong idea here. I was just making sure she was taken care of. Nothing more.

We shook hands. Then I walked to my truck and opened the door, and the doc did the same but hesitated before getting in.

“I’ll call ahead. Tell them who you are so they don’t throw you out immediately.”

I nodded once. I could fight my own battles, had fought my own battles for as long as I could remember, but having additional support never hurt. I got in, waited until the doc cleared out, turned the truck around, and made my descent down the mountain. I stopped at the site of the accident, tossed my ropes in, and after thinking about it for a moment, decided to take Milli’s mangled bicycle. I was about to grab the bike when I spotted her backpack. I put the bike on the truck bed and tossed her backpack on the backseat. There was a chance it would take her a long time to ride her bike again, but she would be glad to have it anyhow. And her backpack, as well.

10

MILLI

One moment, he was sitting next to me in the dirt while I was hanging on for dear life. The next moment, I was on a stretcher with Alan hovering over me. Alan. I trusted Alan. But it was the guy standing next to him, the guy who rescued me, whose soothing words reached me and calmed me like a warm blanket even though I went to that place.

He was the one my eyes locked onto to make sure he was still there. But why? Why did looking at him calm me down, when everything in this situation was scaring me to death? Why did just watching his face and listening to his voice instill faith in me that everything would work out just fine as long as he was by my side? Coming back from the mental place I’d fled to also meant I could now feel my body hurting. Really hurting. Though his presence even masked the pain somehow. Then he stepped back, and I was brought into the ambulance so Alan could take care of me. I felt the increase in distance like a physical sensation as if his presence had warmed me, and now I missed it. Weird. Logically, I knew this was completely absurd. But my body sure felt a lot colder all of a sudden.

The drive to the hospital was okay yet painful. The hospital was quiet and empty. Small Town medicine. Then Dr. Niki Michaels bent over me, and I nearly wept with how relieved I felt to see a friendly and familiar face. I would have managed with another doc. Would have managed to pretend I was fine which I’d done often over the years. But I knew Niki; I trusted Niki. She was best friends with the social worker responsible for my case. And she’d been one of the facilitators of the self-defense classes my grandpa forced me and Tara to take. So even if she hadn’t been my doctor before, didn’t know the extent of my…past, at least it made everything easier.

“Hey, Milli, I knew I recognized that name. You got banged up pretty good. I’m sending you to get some x-rays first, and afterward, we’ll take a closer look at you, okay?” Niki Michaels squeezed my hand and waited for my nod before she hailed someone to roll me away.

X-rays were a painful affair. The tech wanted me to turn my leg this way and that way. And every single movement hurt. Though the pain was excruciating, I could handle it just fine. Just like old times. Then I was back in the emergency room and waited there, staring at a hideous, dazzling, bright wall until Niki came back in. She had a serious expression on her face, and for a moment, my stomach squeezed tight. Bad news.

“I’ve got relatively good news,” she said and took the chair next to me.

Well, now, that wasn’t what I had expected.

She pushed the blanket to the side and examined my leg. “The x-rays don’t show any new fractures.”

She probed at my ankle, and I clenched my teeth.

“Your ankle and knee are both pretty swollen. We can see if there are broken bones on the x-rays. What we can’t see is potential ligament damage. We’ll have to take an MRI tomorrow to see what happened in your joints. Right now, I would say applying ice is our first course of action. I will give you a brace for your knee and your ankle. You will have to go easy on the leg for the next couple of days—for sure, your hand, as well.” She looked at me, waiting, gauging.

Was she waiting for my okay? That I understood all she’d said? “Rest and ice for the next couple of days—got it.”

“There is something else I want to talk to you about.” She stopped when the door opened and a nurse came inside.

“Hey, can you give us a couple of minutes?”

The nurse looked at Niki as if a request like that confused her but then turned around and stepped out once more.

Only after the door closed behind her did Niki turn back to me.

“There are a lot of old fractures visible on your x-rays.”

She looked at me, waiting, expecting some kind of explanation.

My throat closed up, and my eyes shot to the door. For a moment, I got into full-blown panic mode. But Niki just sat there and looked at me with kind eyes, waiting, not pressurizing me.

It took a while before my initial panic subsided. They were in the past—the pain, the threats. They weren’t part of my life anymore.

“I might be going out on a limb here.” Niki kneaded her hands, then let them fall into her lap. “Those kinds of injuries look a lot like abuse.” She waited for a second. “Are you being abused, Milli?”

A sudden lightness hit me, and I almost chuckled the moment her words were out. I knew what she was going to say. And even though I would live with it my whole life, it was all in the past. But she didn’t know about my past. Didn’t know it was all in a former life. “It’s in the past. I survived. I’m not in any kind of danger anymore—the opposite actually.”

Niki looked relieved. She nodded once, then gently took my hand. She cleaned out the scratches and cuts in my palm and put a dressing on it.

“I’m always here, Milli, and I’m a good listener. We can talk about things. Anything. I want you to know that.”

I squeezed my eyes shut and mumbled a “thank you” through the tears that lodged in my throat. It was strange. Every time someone came to know my past, I couldn’t handle their reaction. Wasn’t prepared for their reaction. Child services had known, the therapist I’d gone to a while ago knew, I guess Grandpa knew, though we never talked about it, and now Niki. Every time I was just as scared, scared if I told someone, I would suffer the consequences. Though, there were no consequences anymore. And despite knowing that, I was still inclined to not tell anyone about it.