Page 65 of Home for the Holidays

“Hey.” Iris’s movements, as she crept as close as possible to the headboard where Heidi was now leaning, were so calming. After moving a few pillows from between them, she reached over, took her hand, and kissed her knuckles. “We’ll be okay.”

“How? How do you know that?” The frantic way her words were spewing out of her mouth was scaring her. That and the fact she had started to cry. Never a good sign.

“Because I’m not going anywhere.”

“He’s going to disown you. Me. Oh my god. I feel like I just got him back, and now I’m going to lose him all over again.”

“Heidi?” Iris’s voice was so soothing. It was such an inopportune time to love the way her name sounded on her lips, yet there she was, wanting to hear it again and again and again. “We can end this. I don’t want you to lose your son over me.” Iris’s eyes were so kind, so full of love. “I would never want you to be unhappy.”

“Stop,” Heidi said softly. “Please stop talking.” Her throat ached from Iris’s compassion. “I don’t want to end this with you.”

“Okay.” Iris shrugged. “So what do we do?”

“I have no idea.”

“I do know one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“You’re a fucking fantastic kisser.”

How did Iris do that? Bring her anxiety down to a simmer while, at one and the same time, making her entire body feel like it was on fire. No other person in her life could ever do that for her. She’d spent so many years wondering if one day karma was going to sneak up behind her and scare the shit out of her. She lived her life so meticulously, with such intention, hoping she’d outrun any chance of reaping what she had sown in Paris. Her slow awakening—which was creeping along at a snail’s pace, honestly—frightened her. Discovering more about herself with Sandy had kept her safe, secure, in control. And then in walked Iris, with her dark hair and her freckles and her sexy-as-hell body, her kind eyes, compassionate heart, and gorgeous soul. For the first time in forever, Heidi had started to question if this was the moment she’d been expertly dodging. Was Iris her karma? Was meeting Iris punishment? The one person sheshouldn’tbe with was the one person who made her feel like she had a handle on herself.

“You’re not too bad yourself.” Heidi breathed out. “Christ. It was good, wasn’t it?”

“Fuck yeah.” Iris chuckled softly. “I want to do it again.”

“God, me too.”

“So, if you don’t want us to stop, and obviously neither do I, what do we do?” Iris’s lips were a dark, deep pink from kissing. Her clean skin seemed to shimmer even in the dim lighting. This woman was everything Heidi had ever wanted in another person. She was breathtaking, but she wasreal. She wasn’ttryingto impress; she was simply impressivewithouttrying.

“We have to decide what we do when this blows up in our faces.” Heidi reached over and ran her fingers down Iris’s cheek, along her sharp jawline. She was so beautiful. Every inch of her. And pulling back from this felt like a crime. “Because it will.”

“What if it doesn’t?”

“It will,” she whispered. “Zac has never been good at sharing.”

Iris’s smirk was so fucking hot. “Whose love would he be sharing?”

“Oh, honey,” Heidi breathed out. “I’d love to say mine, but I see the way he looks at you. You are his person, his other half. It’s shocking you two have only been friends for six months. If I didn’t know any better, which obviously I do, I would have sworn you two were separated at birth.”

“Are you trying to make me feel worse about this?” The hope on Iris’s face, in her eyes, was quickly disappearing. “Because it’s working.”

“No. God, no.” Heidi’s voice cracked. She and her emotions had never been the best bedfellows. “I have this feeling, though, that you have no idea how much your friendship means to him. Hell, how much your friendship with him means tome.”

She wasn’t lying. The knowledge that Zac had such a terrific person in his life was a load off her mind. His lack of visiting, his lack of sharing, and his lack of trusting weren’t nearly as upsetting when she considered that he had someone to share things with—someone to trust.

“If I ruin that?” She closed her eyes, forcing herself to look away from Iris, from her sincerity, from her desire. “I’ll never forgive myself.” The mattress dipped, and then Iris’s hand was on her thigh. There was pressure as she moved it down, over her knee, to her shin.

“His friendship means the world to me too.” Iris squeezed her calf gently.

“Then? What do we do?”

“I guess we don’t do this.” She removed her hand. “It was naive to think this could work, right?”

“No,” Heidi whispered. “It wasn’t naive. Iris, you’re… you’re everything.”

“I should go back to bed.”

---