Page 102 of These Rough Waters

I didn’t regret the decision to listen to her plea, didn’t regret going to save Harper but the guilt of not being quick enough, of not getting to her in time, it was eating me up inside.

“You were there when I wasn’t. And I know you tried your fucking best to save her. Even fucking shot and beaten, you just had to show me up, didn’t you.” I laugh, “I need her, Everett. I’m in love with her and after Grace and Leo, I didn’t think that was possible. She told me what happened, what you tried to do, you crazy bastard, but I know you did it for me. And for Maya.”

I hang my head, “I would have died with her.” I admit. “If she hadn’t have made it, I don’t think I would have either. But I need you to make it too, brother. Don’t you dare fucking die on me, you hear me? Kolten will fucking kill me if you die on my watch but really, as much of a pain in the ass you are, I love you brother. And I need you to stick around for a while longer yet.”

Ruthie takes Harper back to the island late afternoon, the goodbye between the three of them seeming like something out of a war film. There were tears and goodbyes and promises like we weren’t planning on coming back as soon as Maya was given the all clear.

The sun sets over the concrete jungle of a city, nothing like the tiny island that was our home. And for the past five years I haven’t appreciated that small town with its dramatic peaks and infinite coastline, or temperamental weather and rough waters but now, I missed it.

I missed sitting out the storms with a fire burning and Maya in my arms. I missed working on the cabin while Harper swung her legs on the back of my truck. I missed the peace of that island; of the tranquility I had found with my little doe.

I grasp Maya’s hand with mine, engulfing it with my own and run my thumb across her knuckles.

“I’m sorry,” She says.

My head snaps up, “What?”

“For what I put you through,” She shifts and winces, sending sickness to my stomach, “With what happened with…” She pauses, “Grace, I can’t imagine it was easy.”

“There isn’t anything to be sorry for, Maya but I need you to understand something with me.”

She nods.

“I’m all in, Maya, all fucking in. You call, I come. You hurt, I hunt down the source of your pain and destroy it. If you are mine,you are mine.There’s no if’s or but’s. I am in love with you, little doe. This heart belongs to you, and I will follow you anywhere.”

“Before,” She swallows, looking down to our joined hands, “When I thought I wasn’t going to make it, I realized I only had two regrets.”

I watch her face, her green eyes, and plump lips, so full of expression and emotion, “The first was that I didn’t get to say goodbye to Harper. I left her and I know that will haunt her for the rest of her life. She needed me but I had to protect her.”

“She will understand,” I confirm, “One day.”

“I know.” Her eyes meet mine, “The second regret…”

Her eyes bounce around my face, taking in every inch of me, “Was that I never told you I loved you too. I would have died, and you never would have known that you saved me.”

My teeth clamp together.

“I thought I’d never get to experience real love. Or a real life. Or freedom. And you showed me it all when I hadn’t even realized I was looking for it.”

“Maya…”

“Thank you,” She whispers, “For accepting my decision to go with Trevor for Harper’s sake. I had to make that choice for my daughter.”

I nod, understanding.

“But I love you, Torin,” She says, “More than I ever thought possible.”

I don’t waste another minute, I move quickly and take her face in my hands, pressing my mouth to hers. Kissing her with every ounce of my being and filling it with every word I cannot say.

Epilogue

Two months later

“Ashot gun wedding,” Rett whistles, decked out in a tux and a grin to rival all grins, “You hiding something, sugar?”

I roll my eyes at him but cross the room, wrapping my arms around him. “Glad you could leave the mainland to come see us.”

“Well, I couldn’t miss the wedding,” He tuts, “As fucking if. Plus, it’s the perfect opportunity for me to rub my brothers’ words in a little more.”

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