Page 39 of The Alpha's Triplets

He was so deep inside her, her eyes watered delightfully. When he started to thrust into her, she gripped onto reality and consciousness with all her mind. She’d kept tumbling in and out of awareness the previous night, and she was determined that it would be different now.

She kept her eyes open, even as they blurred with tears. She locked eyes with Blake, and in that moment, she felt something reach into her from him. Something she couldn’t name or explain. It felt better than sex. It felt purer. And with that connection, guilt swallowed Eleanor whole.

She stopped moving immediately and tried to get off. Blake, who had closed his eyes, blinked them open and his confusion was apparent. He held onto her waist and cocked his head to the side. “What’s wrong?”

Eleanor ripped his fingers off her body more roughly than she’d intended to, and she tried to ignore the expression of hurt on his face. Her heart felt like it would explode the longer he remained inside her.

She knew she was acting weird—even she didn’t understand her own actions. All she knew was that she had to get off of him. Her body protested against it. His body protested against it. She didn’t care.

She rolled off of Blake and lay on her back, facing the ceiling. Her breathing was hard and she tried to get in control of herself. It was not the easiest of tasks. Blake watched her curiously with a hint of worry beneath the curiosity.

He didn’t speak, however. He didn’t try to touch her, either. He waited and watched her carefully, no doubt wondering what was going on and why she had changed so suddenly.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I know I’m acting weird, it’s just that—”

“Hey, hey,” Blake said, placing a hand on her knee. “You have nothing to be sorry about. Alright? Nothing. It’s alright.”

She looked at him and wanted to believe him, that it was alright. He looked so solid. But she knew that it wasn’t alright. They could pretend as long as they wanted that everything was fine, but she knew the truth, and she was sure he did too. Someone had to mention the inevitable.

“Xander,” Blake said, as if he’d read her mind. Perhaps he had.

She nodded. “I can’t imagine this is something that he can ever find out about. I don’t know how he would react to it, but I don’t think he would take it lightly.”

“He won’t,” Blake said, shaking his head. Eleanor saw the guilt etched on his face and knew that he’d probably had the thought at the back of his mind as long as she had. Maybe longer.

He looked angry, but it was a muted anger. Almost as if he was angry with himself more than anything else. Too late, she wished she hadn’t said anything at all. It seemed a little too late to have such a thought, seeing as how she’d ruined a perfectly beautiful moment.

“Hey, Blake,” she said, touching his cheek. “Hey, look at me.” She turned his face toward her and scooted closer. He looked ashamed, but Eleanor decided there was nothing for either of them to feel ashamed about.

They were both consenting adults, and they were married. They had not committed any crimes, and there was no reason why something so beautiful had to come to an end. It hurt her to see Blake so deflated for chasing after his passion.

“Listen,” she said. “Nothing needs to change. Alright? Look, I get it. You and Xander have been best friends for so long, you’re practically brothers. So this feels kinda weird. I get that. But nothing has to change.

“We can’t lose focus about why we got married in the first place. We need to see this marriage through and find a way to introduce some new customs in both your pack and my old one, and I don’t see any harm in exploring the benefits of this marriage in the meantime.

“Besides, I don’t know about you, but last night was the most beautiful night of my life. It was beautiful and perfect and I have no intentions of stopping. This is way too good to pass up. We already pretend to be in love in public, why can’t we have something special as a reward in private?”

Blake didn’t look convinced, but she could tell he was seriously considering her words. The implication was clear. If they entered this arrangement, he couldn’t tell Xander about it.

It felt like every aspect of their marriage depended on smoke and mirrors, but Eleanor realized she didn’t care if Blake didn’t. And given the tingles she was still feeling between her legs, she planned to persuade him to accept her offer if he decided to change his mind.

She watched Blake impatiently as he turned over the idea in his head, tasting it and weighing it methodically. She wished he would make up his mind already and save her from the anxiety she was currently feeling.

“Fine.” Blake smiled a weak smile. “I guess we can try. And I assure you, it really was beautiful for me too.”

Eleanor beamed excitedly. Her wolf howled happily and she shared the feeling. She loved how safe she felt around Blake. While she would have felt better if they had met under different circumstances, she was determined to take what she could get.

Despite her excitement, she couldn’t shake of the nagging feeling that one day what they had was going to come to an end. She’d always known and had always ignored the fact. After what they had shared, it seemed impossible for her to ignore it anymore.

When the time eventually came for her to leave this behind, she knew it was going to take everything within her to do so. She knew how hard it was going to be, and she wasn’t sure she was ready to deal with that reality. She couldn’t imagine she would ever be ready.

“Eleanor?” Blake shook her knee gently, pulling her out of her thoughts. “I was asking if you’d like for me to make us some breakfast?”

She smiled and nodded. There was time enough to wonder what would happen next, she decided. Now, she planned to enjoy this moment with Blake.

Chapter 14 - Blake

Blake couldn’t see Eleanor but he had an idea of where she would be. Even with the sun shining brightly in the middle of the sky, he often struggled to see her black wolf when they went running in the woods together. With daybreak still over an hour away, it was pointless trying to get a glimpse of her.

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