Page 85 of Love Redesigned

“You’re spending your Sunday night drinking in a bar with me of all people. If you have any friends, clearly they’re shitty ones.”

He hit my weakness on the head. Besides Rafa, I don’t have any friends since half the men in town work for me while the other half are double my age.

Expanding my dad’s business came with sacrifices, and my social life happened to be one of them.

But not the biggest.

Dahlia’s words from earlier haunt me.

Maybehewas the one too afraid of the risks. Maybe he should have built a life with her rather than erecting a wall to keep her out.

Thing is, when my dad died, I struggled with a long list of issues—fear being only one of them. Pride. Anger.Grief. Everything in my life turned to shit, and my personality along with it.

Things I had wanted—like a degree from Stanford and a shot at something special with Dahlia—were no longer possible after my life drastically changed overnight.

I was barely an adult when I made the decision to push Dahlia away, and it led to my immature choice to cut her out of my life after becoming friends during our freshman year. It was insensitive and unfair of me, so she had every right tofind someone who made her feel secure in a way I couldn’t as a twenty-year-old guy battling grief while saving his dad’s failing business.

A memory I kept locked away resurfaces, dragging me back to my time at Stanford.

“When do you plan on telling Dahlia that you like her?” Oliver asked me once Dahlia left our dorm room after our late-night study session.

“Who said I like her?” I kept my tone nonchalant despite my rising blood pressure.

“You smiled when you came back from the bathroom and caught her snooping around your desk.”

I held my tongue. Rafa was the only person I felt comfortable enough with to talk to about my crush, and I planned on keeping it that way.

He shrugged.“You better tell her soon before someone else makes a move on her.”

I’m yanked out of the past by a sharp pain shooting through my heart. No matter how many times I tell myself that I couldn’t have known Oliver was an asshole, I still feel partially responsible for introducing Dahlia to him.

If you hadn’t pushed her away, she would have never gotten close to him.

I take a sip of my beer, hoping to wash away the sour taste.

No amount of alcohol will change the fact that you care about her enough to resent yourself.

Fuck. I wipe a hand down my face. Drinking at a bar was supposed to give me a break from thinking about Dahlia.

I chug the rest of my beer and stand. “Henry, can I get thecheck, please?”

“Where are you going?” Lorenzo’s smile quickly transforms into a frown.

I ignore the man who can’t seem to take a hint. Henry is quick with charging my card and passing me the receipt to sign.

“I thought we were going to have a real bonding moment here.” The ice in Lorenzo’s glass rattles from his long sip.

“How much will it cost me to get you out of this town?”

“I have no interest in making any more money.”

I pause for a beat. “Then what do you want?”

“Only friends get to know that.” He raises his glass in a mock toast before knocking back the rest of the contents.

I add a decent tip and sign the bottom of my check before exiting the bar. My relief at escaping Lorenzo’s incessant talking is short-lived when I remember the dull ache that hasn’t left me since the library.

I rub the spot over my heart and wish for it to go away.

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