Page 109 of Sex Ed

I step towards her and take her hand. ‘I think it could be a thing…’

‘A thing?’ she asks, trying to hold in her smile.

‘I’m not allowed to call it a thing, am I?’

She shakes her head.

‘I think it could be everything, is that better?’

And with that, I grab her without any sense of awkwardness, without overthinking anything, without any hesitation, and I kiss her. And I smile as our lips meet because she taught me how to do that, to let go, to let things unfold without a script. And it is everything to hold her in my arms, to feel her kiss me in return. It makes me so incredibly happy to be in this moment, realising that the person I love has been next to me this whole time, stealing my crisps.

‘G’WAN, MR ROGERS!’

We part to see bunches of faces in the windows of this hotel, cheering. I wave at them, and Mia looks around incredulous, pointing at them. They all appear from the doors leading out to the patio.

‘Miss Johnson, are you back?’ one girl says, coming outside to throw her arms around her.

‘I’m back,’ she tells her.

‘You’re coming to dance, yeah? Both of you?’ a boy asks, pointing his fingers to the sky, his sunglasses possibly hiding that he’s stoned to the hilt. I hear the mixed beats of something from inside that room and widen my eyes. A hand slips into mine and I grip it tightly as the group of kids usher us inside.

‘Don’t look so scared,’ she says, a broad grin on her face.

‘I don’t get all this Stormy type music,’ I explain.

‘Stormzy,’ she corrects me, laughing. ‘Ed, don’t worry. You’re with me. You’ll be fine.’

Has she said those words to me before? I think she has. And with that, she takes both of my hands as we jump with the crowd of kids, lights bouncing off Mia’s face, limbs flailing everywhere, my pulse beating in time with something inside me. I look up to the ceiling and close my eyes. I’ve never done this before. Ever. And for once, I don’t think I care. I have Mia now. I’ll be fine.

EPILOGUE

MIA

‘I got you something,’ Ed says, handing over a perfectly wrapped box with a ribbon. It’s very Ed. I don’t wrap gifts like this. I feel the gift is enough, I have made that effort so how it is presented is somewhat irrelevant. Is this food? I hope it’s food. He does this a lot, the little gifts. He leaves them at my desk or on my pillow. Sometimes they’re books, comedy coasters, chocolate bars, occasionally they’re lone condoms with a Post-it Note and his attempt at drawing a cock and balls. I open the box and inside is a teeny tiny yellow rake sat there in the tissue paper.

‘I am not sure what this is, Ed,’ I say, perplexed, wondering why and how this might be used for sex. I don’t think I want to rake my vagina.

‘It’s a back scratcher. Look, it has a telescopic handle so you can get those itches right at the centre of your back,’ he tells me excitedly.

‘But I like it when you scratch my back,’ I complain.

‘But you have a very itchy back. It’s like every night. You really need to moisturise more.’

‘That’s like buying me a vibrator and telling me to sex myself because you’re too tired to do it yourself.’

He frowns. ‘Oh, I like the sex bit. I’ll keep doing that bit. I’m just trying to streamline my duties.’

I laugh loudly and reach over and kiss him. I don’t have to pull my shirt down because my breasts are out, my whole naked body is out in Ed’s bed on a Sunday afternoon and it’s not a lesson in sex. It’s just two people, hanging out, who had some pretty awesome sex an hour ago but who are taking a break with cake and someStar Wars. Do I want to watch this? Maybe not but I like seeing how excited it makes Ed to see these strange people and toad creatures, wrapped in hessian, touring through space with their laser beam weapon things.

‘This is still very confusing to me, there’s so much to watch. Who is this Mandalorian fella? Why can’t we see his face? Is it actually Luke Skywalker…?’

‘It isn’t.’

‘Then how does Yoda get so old?’

‘That’s not Yoda.’

‘Looks just like him.’

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