“I can’t, Chris, it hurts so bad.” Tears are streaking down my cheeks, but I refuse to look at him; he hates it when I cry. Always has. He used to want to slay dragons when I got upset, now he just gets angry and calls me weak and pathetic.
“It can’t hurt that bad—all you did was trip. Get up!” He jams his foot into my side, kicking me. The spaghetti strap on my dress breaks, and my bare shoulder scrapes across the driveway giving it road rash. Lying in a ball with one hand on my ankle and the other on my shoulder, I just don’t understand how we got to this place. Glimpses of past memories flicker through my eyes: moments when he was gentle, kisses that were tender, and a loving smile that was just for me. My stomach clenches as I prevent the sob that wants to break free.
“Why don’t you just leave? Go home, Chris! I want to be left alone!” I keep my face hidden, but I’m loud enough where I know he hears me.
“Go home? Are you joking? After what you said to me in the car there is no way I’m going home. I’m never going anywhere. It’s you and me, babe, for life . . . and you need to be reminded why we are so good together.”
More tears fall, just like the rain. What do I do? How do I get him to leave? If I can just get inside, I can lock the door and call for help. I’m not sure who to call, but at this point anyone will do.
“Fine,” he snaps. “But don’t say I didn’t give you enough time to get up.” With that, my head jerks backward as his hand wraps around my ponytail and he pulls me toward the door.
Screams pierce the air around us and when his other hand comes down and slaps me in the mouth, I realize they are mine.
“Shut up!” Blood floods my mouth as my teeth break the skin behind my lips. He pulls harder as his other hand grabs my arm. I bounce across the ground trying to get up, but it isn’t working. My ankle won’t support my weight, so my knees and the palms of my hands drag across the ground.
Every part of me hurts. My hair, my face, my mouth, my shoulder, my hands, my knees, my ankle . . . but mostly my heart. He was my best friend and the love of my life. How, after a lifetime together, he could treat me so horribly hurts worse than any physical pain he could ever inflict on me.
I look up into his face, his handsome face that once meant so much to me, and I see someone I don’t know looking back at me. I want to help him, and I want to save him from this person that he’s becoming. It’s not him, I know it’s not, but what do I do? And why do I even want to after the way he’s treated me?
“Chris! Stop!” He does, and wobbly, I push up off the ground to face him.
His eyes scan over me from head to toe and then come back to my face. He leans over until we are only inches apart and his eyes lock onto mine. Through the rain, there’s no mistaking how dark his eyes have become. Countless hours I have stared into his warm brown eyes, but now all I see is darkness and rage. “Get your keys out and open the damn door,” he spits. Blood drains from my face, and with it my body cowers before him.
He shoves my purse in my stomach, knocking the air from my lungs. I must have dropped it on the way to the door. Quickly, I fumble through the pockets and make the mistake of sniffing, alerting him to the tears.
“Are you crying?” he jerks on my arm so I’m facing him again, my skin pinched under his fingers. His eyes narrow and his jaw tics.
“It hurts.” I don’t want to sound weak—I don’t want tobeweak—but I’m terrified of him and what’s to come once we go inside.
“Well, it’s your fault. Stop fighting me. Do as you’re told. Open the damn door!” He twists his wrist, twisting my arm, and I cry out in pain. Shouldn’t it have broken by now? He shoves me forward and my face hits the door. Stars float in front of me and my stomach turns over. Dinner and every drop of bile comes rushing to the top, and I vomit all over the door.
“What the fuck?” Chris jumps backward, and I lean against the house to make everything stop spinning. Rain pours down over me. It washes away any evidence that he and I have on the front porch and chills my stinging skin.
Desperation and panic consume me. I have to get in the house and I have to get away from him.
Pulling the keys, I stick them in the lock and pause. This is my chance; it’s now or never. I turn to face him, and using my hurt leg, I shove my knee so far up into his crotch I hope his balls end up in his stomach. His face contorts as he bends over and cries out in pain. Using all the strength I have in me, I shove him backward so he falls down the steps.
Not wasting one second, I unlock the door, slip inside, and slam it shut. Twisting the lock back in place, I’m frozen as I stare at the only thing separating me from him.
The silence inside the house is a complete contrast to the sounds outside. Instantly gone are the rain and the wind, only to be replaced by the ticking of the grandfather clock and the ringing in my ears.
Taking a step backward, I slip further into the darkness of the hallway. My eyes never leaving the door. My heartbeat is erratic, my chest so tight I can hardly breathe, and I just want this to all be over.
BANG!
The door rattles on its hinges and shrill screams leave my throat.
“Av! Open the door!” His foot kicks the door repeatedly, and I take a few steps further away.
“If you don’t open this door right this minute, things will be so much worse for you!”
I can’t help but think, how could they possibly be worse? And then there’s the silence.
Is he leaving? Is he finding another way in? What’s he doing? My eyes dart to the windows, but there’s no movement. I also don’t hear the engine of his car.
I take a few more steps back and my hip bumps into the hall console table. Grabbing on to it for support, my entire body starts shaking.
Echoing through the darkness, I hear the familiar sound of a key sliding in the lock.