Page 49 of Lost Times

He cupped my cheeks, lifting my chin to stare at him. “I will. You have good reason to be worried and I won’t say you don’t. I’m breaking my promise by doing this and I hate that, but this will be the only time.”

God, I hoped so.

Nodding, I tried to paste on a smile. “Of course.”

If his grimace was any indication, I’d failed on making it look believable. Gently separating from him, I said. “I’m going to check on Jasmine.”

She was probably sobbing her heart out right now and while she might tell me she wanted to be alone, I had to be sure. If that was the case, I’d leave her to it until she was ready for cuddles.

He looked toward her room, swallowing hard. “I want to come too. She’s crying because of me and I-.” He stopped short, shaking his head. “I don’t want her to cry because of me.”

I believed that, the pain still clear in his eyes told me just how true that was, but I bit my lip. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, at least not right now. Let me test the waters. She might not even want me there right now.”

He flinched, but followed silently, stepping to the side to wait as I knocked on her door. “Honey, it’s me. Do you want me to come back later?”

A long beat passed, then I heard her. “No, I want a hug.”

My heart twisted at her voice's congested tone, and I grabbed the handle, pausing when I remembered Ludwig waiting.

“Ludwig is here too, do you want him to come in?” I asked, already knowing the answer even before she said it.

“No.”

He deflated, but nodded. “Alright, I’ll give you space, but Jasmine…” He trailed off, fighting for words before finally settling on. “Iamsorry, and I promise this won’t happen again. Your next recital, or sports game, or science fair, I’m going to be there with your mother cheering you on.”

She sniffed. “Okay.”

He stepped away, expression torn in hundreds of different directions. “I’m going to go sit in the living room.” He looked painfully lost, so I nodded, giving his hand a squeeze before sliding into Jasmine’s room.

The lights were out and she laid on her side on the bed, her pillow clutched to her chest as she cried into it. Sitting next to her, I ran a hand through her hair and said nothing. She had a right to be disappointed and I wasn’t about to tell her she didn’t.

It was better to let her cry it out and feel all the bad stuff than bottle it.

After a minute, she rolled over and threw her arms around my neck, burrowing her face against my shoulder. Leaning against the wall, I rocked her a bit and kissed her head.

“I love you,” I said, offering the only words that might help.

She unburied herself from my neck and looked up at me, red-rimmed eyes still watery. “Does he, though?”

And just like that, my heart shattered.

“Honey, I know this is hard for you, but I promise he loves you. He stood up to his parents when they tried to make him leave us. He wouldn’t do that if he didn’t love us, right?”

A fear I hadn’t seen until now eased a tiny bit, and she nodded. “His parents were mean.”

I winced. “Yeah, they were, but he told them he wouldn’t leave us. You know what that means?” I waited for her to meet my eyes before continuing.

“It means that he’s staying and in the future, when things like this happen, he’ll prove to you that this won’t happen again. He’ll prove it to both of us.”

At least I hoped so, because I wasn’t sure what I’d do otherwise. I couldn’t very well expect Jasmine to keep getting her hopes up if hedidmake this a habit. He said he wouldn’t, and more than anything, I wanted to believe that.

I needed to believe that because otherwise, I had to ask myself if I’d made a mistake bringing him into our little family, and I wasn’t ready for that question.

Jasmine wiped her eyes, nodding. “He promised he’d be at the next one.” She said, hope flashing to life. Scooting back, she looked at her door before hesitantly asking. “Is he still there?”

Slipping off the bed, I hummed. “He’s in the living room. He knew you needed space but wanted to be nearby.”

He hadn’t said as much, but his face had all but screamed it.