Page 31 of Lost Times

The man I’d been unable to get out of my head since the day we slept together.

That steady stare faltered and he straightened, his lips curling down into a frown as he asked. “I understand that, and I’m willing to try. I would insist that work stays a professional space, but we could plan things outside of it.” Then he went on, more hesitant now. “Do you not want something more with me? You don’t need to worry about your job or custody of Jasmine when answering, either. I’m a grown adult, and if you don’t want anything like that, then I’ll accept the rejection and move on. Nothing will change.”

I hadn’t considered for even one minute that he would fire me or try to take Jasmine, even with what little of him I truly knew, I knew without a doubt he would never do that.

Though this was a convenient out for me. One lie, that’s all it would take. I could lie, tell him that I wasn’t interested in more, and the entire conversation would be buried.

But when I opened my mouth to say the words, I caught his eyes and the hope there stopped me short. Had I ever seen him like this; open and vulnerable?

Yes, I had and it was years ago on our one night together. The longer I spent with him, the more hints of that man came to the surface. An ache started in my chest, all but reaching outward for him, and all the years of lonely nights hit at once.

How many times had I wanted a chance to see where things would go between us? How many times had I stared at my ceiling, wondering how different things would have been if he’d been open to more between us?

Here was my chance, and while I could lie and walk away without any complications, I didn’t want that. I wanted to see where this would go, and with that in mind, I spoke.

“I do want this.” My voice was rough, my hand drifting to his against my better judgment as I continued. “I’ve wanted this since the day I woke up next to you in that hotel room.”

His eyes softened, the lines on his face losing their hard edges as he squeezed my hand and nodded. “So did I, though I told myself it was better to focus on my work. There was always a part of me that wondered what would have happened if I left you my number.”

I swallowed and asked. “So what now? We’re both interested in more, but what do we do with that?”

My hormones had some ideas, and with Jasmine solidly out for at least another hour I was tempted to listen. There’d been no one else since him and having him so close–with that damn cologne all but wrapping around me–was hell on my resistance.

He glanced down, eyes freezing on my chest and the nipples that’d perked with my thoughts. His tongue flicked out again, pupils expanding as molten heat poured through his gaze. Taking a deep breath, he forced his eyes back up to mine and asked, voice rougher now.

“That entirely depends on what you want. If you want to take things slow, we can do that, or if you want…more, we can do that too.” His hand trailed up my arm and throat, stopping at my cheek and stroking lightly. The touch swept tingles out from it, and he hummed. “It’s up to you, but you need to decide quickly, because being this close to you is a hazard to my ability to think.”

Seeing the arousal all but sparking off him–a perfect match to mine–nearly made my decision then and there. Was there a reason to take things slow? We’d already slept together, the proof of that slept soundly in the next room over, and obviously, neither of us wanted to wait.

Fighting past the jittery nerves, I reached out, curling my fingers into his shirt and tugging until he bent. When less than an inch of air lingered between us, I answered. “Let’s start here, and see where it goes.”

Then I closed the distance, warmth shooting through my veins as his arm curled around my back and pressed me closer. He tipped his head, tongue sliding out to trail along my lips. I opened, nearly moaning when he wasted no time.

Shifting to press me against the wall, he loomed, twining our tongues and sucking until a pulse of heat settled between my legs.

I remembered what that tongue could do. Even years later, my body hadn’t forgotten, and now it wanted an encore. Without thought, I bucked into him, grinding in a search of friction.

Ludwig cracked an eye, pulling back for air as his hand worked open my pants and slid inside. Nudging aside my underwear, two fingers dipped in and I arched into him, needing more. His lips quirked, and he hummed lowly.

“If you want me to slow down, you’ll need to say so, because otherwise I’m going to throw you back on that bed, and I’m not stopping until I feel you clamped around me.”

The words all but throbbed with promise and I bucked on his hand, one word choking out of me with the last of my rational thoughts. “Condom.”

Not that it’d really done any good last time…

He hesitated and I could all but see the thought moving across his face too. Before he could worry about it, I added. “I’m on the pill too, but obviously, we shouldn’t leave anything to chance.”

He nodded, removing his hand–much to the reluctance of my hormones–and pulled out his wallet. Just like years ago, the foil sat neatly tucked into the fold and he removed it. Setting it onto the nightstand for now, he trailed his hands to the hem of my shirt and tugged it upward.

It hit the floor, my pants following shortly after until I leaned against the wall in nothing but my underwear. Vulnerability struck, and I shifted to partially cover the old scars and stretch marks from pregnancy.

When he noticed that, he scowled, shaking his head with a growl. “Don’t hide from me.”

Then he dropped, kissing my thigh where more stretch marks rested–those not from Jasmine–before making a path upward. He slid over every little scar, his tongue flicking out as if he could taste them, and once he reached my stomach he paused there.

Looking up at me, he spoke, tone steady and certain. “You’re gorgeous, not in spite of these marks, but because of them. They’re a part of you, and that makes them beautiful.”

The words stroked along every insecurity I had, soothing them as I shivered. I’d burned to hear something like that over the years, but actuallyhearingit was something else.

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