Page 22 of Lost Times

I never thought he’d try this hard to be a part of her life, and he’d even made a point of telling her he couldn’t come like I’d asked! I’d misjudged him by hilarious proportions, and I could only hope he kept it up. I’d never been happier to be wrong before, and in this case, I didn’t want to be right.

Jasmine may not have ever strictly said it out loud, but she wanted a father, and ifthiswas the real Ludwig, the one hidden under all the layers of grump, then I wanted him in our life for more than just Jasmine’s sake.

The best we’d have would be friendship and co-parenting, but that was more than I’d ever thought to have with him after our one night.

It would have to be enough.

Ludwig straightened, nerves coming back now as he cleared his throat. “Ah, your mother probably won’t be all that happy to hear about me.”

Jasmine tipped her head, confusion clear. “Why wouldn’t she be?”

I patted her hair, soothing him in the same motion. “Actually, I don’t think she’ll be all that against you. She understands the circumstances and how determined you are to be here will actually work in your favor.”

Considering she’d wanted me to tell him about Jasmine, it wasn’t a stretch of the imagination to say she wanted to at least give him a chance.

Some of his worry cleared and Jasmine took the opportunity to chime in again, her eyes all but glowing. “Since he can’t make it to the recital, can we plan a family day with him?”

I figured she’d ask that, and while I had no problems with it, that schedule of his was going to make things interesting…

I looked at him, leaving the answer in his hands, and he pulled out his phone with a frown. “This week is booked solid, but we could probably do something next weekend?” The offer was hesitant but genuine, and Jasmine nodded.

“I don’t have school on the weekend!” Then she paused, remembering that she had to get permission for such things, and turned to me. “Can we?”

At least she remembered eventually. Biting back a chuckle, I nodded. “That sounds fine. We can figure out what we’ll do soon. For now, I need to get everything ready for dinner.”

Sparing a glance at Ludwig, I offered. “You can stay, if you want?”

He opened his mouth, sucking in a breath to answer with a look that almost seemed hopeful, but then his phone blared to life and he grimaced. He glanced at the caller ID and his scowl deepened. His hand drifted over the phone, a war playing out across his features, before finally he shut his phone off and nodded.

“I would like that.” He said, and despite the action being small, something told me that him turning off his phone was abigthing to him. Heeding that instinct, I smiled, making sure he could see how much I appreciated the gesture.

“Then I’ll get started.” The grimace faded into a small smile, his face opening up into something less menacing. When I realized we’d been silently staring at one another for a minute or so, I cleared my throat and addressed Jasmine.

“Why don’t you tell him how your day went while I get dinner ready?”

She lit up, immediately clamping to his hand and tugging his attention to her. “Good idea, Mom! I made a new friend, and she’s awesome. I can’t wait for you to meet her, she likes drawing, and lions, and-.”

His eyes widened, the sudden onslaught of chatter surprising him, but to his credit he didn’t shush her. Despite being overwhelmed, he nodded along, now completely absorbed in Jasmine’s story.

I shook my head, walking to the kitchen while digesting everything that's happened today. Jasmine had taken it well, better than I thought to be honest. Was that because she’d secretly wanted a father figure?

A pinch of guilt that I hadn’t noticed hit before I pushed it away. Guilt was useless, and until now, I wouldn’t have been able to do anything about it anyway. It was better to focus on the present and enjoy it.

With that in mind, I started making dinner, keeping an ear out to make sure Jasmine wasn’t giving him too hard of a time. So far he was keeping up admirably and when I peeked out to check on them during a quiet lull, my heart twisted.

Jasmine had turned on her cartoons and was now happily watching, half curled against Ludwig. The man was the picture of awkward, his frame tense to a painful degree, but he didn’t look unhappy to be there despite the child’s cartoons he was watching.

Familiar warm and squishy feelings swept through me at the sight, ones I’d felt for him only one night years ago, and when they stayed after a minute, I slammed cold reality down on top of them.

He was willing to be here as a father to Jasmine, but that didn’t mean we were picking up where we left off. We hadn’t even had a relationship back then, so the best we’d be was friends with benefits, and I didn’t want to complicate things here.

No, co-parenting would be all we’d ever be, and that wasfine.

No matter how much my hormones said otherwise.

Flashing back to how he’d point-blank told Jasmine that he couldn’t make it to the recital, I shifted mental topics with years of practice.

He’d kept his promise not to get her hopes up, and I appreciated that. I wouldn’t fault him for having a job that kept him busy, that was life, and as long as Jasmine wasn’t hurt in the crossfire then everything was perfect.

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