Page 18 of All Of My Firsts

“So, I was thinking, on your list you have a ‘say yes the whole day’,” I pause, sipping more of my drink. “Will you actually stay true to that?”

She nods her head, then knocks back a gulp of her drink too. “Yes.”

“Good girl. You’re all mine on Saturday then.”

Her body stiffens at my suggestion. Before I can work out if her reaction is a good or bad thing, our starters arrive, and we eat for a while in silence. After I swallow down a delicious scallop, I ask Nora about work. I like watching her face light up when she talks. It’s evident how much she loves her job and how dedicated she is. Other women I’ve spent time with, usually in bars and never on dates, are not as willing to talk to me, they want me for what I can do to them in the bedroom (or wherever really), and conversation quickly dries up. But not with Nora. It’s refreshing to talk to someone who understands the pressures of achievements and wanting to meet the goals you set yourself. I’ve always been goal orientated and I like the fact Nora seems to be as well.

When we finish our starters and the plates are cleared, leaving the table empty for a second. I pour her another glass of wine and then refill my own. “Thank you,” She smiles and we cheers.

“So, tell me something no one else knows about you,” I ask, wanting to know more about her.

“Okay… when I was at university, I tried my hand at musical theatre. I had to make sure that therapy was it for me by testing out other things. I used to take plenty of risks back then.” She looks thoughtful for a second, a ghost of a sad smile tipping the corners of her mouth. “Turns out, I was definitely meant to be a therapist and listen, rather than sing, dance, or act. I truly sucked at them all.” She laughs quietly, a full smile now gracing her face, making my stomach flip; a feeling I’ve never felt before. I don’t linger too long on that realisation, unsure how to process it.

“Didn’t you have karaoke on your list?” I ask curiously.

Her nose scrunches. “I do. Mostly because it feels like something everyone has to do at least once and aside from singing for my teacher in university, I’ve never sung in front of anyone.”

I nod, understanding. “I like the list. It’s a good idea,” I say honestly. I move my feet under the table, tapping against hers for a moment, the contact making my body hum. What I’d do to be closer to her. Suddenly this table feels huge, and I don’t like it.

“Thank you.” She smiles and then pauses, hesitation crossing her face. “I think seeing Jess get her happily ever after with Liam made me realise that I am nowhere near that point in my life. And truly, that’s okay. I don’t want to rush, if anything, I don’t know what I want for my future, but I felt like my life needed to change. I mean, it already was changing with Liam being back again, so I thought, well, I may as well make some changes that are meaningful to me.” She sips the remainder of her wine. “That’s not to say that my karaoke session is going to change my life, but… it lets me feel alive and I want that.”

The way she waves her hands around her face when she talks, as though she’ll make more of her point by gesturing all over the place, is endearing.

“Sorry, that was a bit of a ramble, wasn’t it?” She flushes.

“No, I like you being honest with me. It wasn’t a ramble; it was the truth.” I hadn’t realised how much of myself I’d not been putting out into the world too. Until right now.

Truth… my mind gets stuck on that word for a second as a memory takes over.

“You don’t get to decide how much of the truth I get to hear, Mark!” my mum shouts, but only when she’s really angry with my dad, like now. His face is red, and that purple vein is pulsing, the only he only gets when he and mum argue funnily enough.

“Viv, I’m not having this conversation again. Nothing happened. I was working late.” He huffs, throwing his suit jacket across the room.

“I’m taking Grayson and moving us to my sister’s–is that what you want? For the two of us to move to get away from your lies? All you need to do is tell me the truth.”

I don’t want to move. I like my friends here at school.

“Try it, Viv. Take the kid with you and see how fast I’ll have him back here with me. Don’t be stupid about this. He’ll never want to stay with you anyway.”

I don’t really want to stay and listen to either of my parents, but my mum is holding my shoulders, standing behind me by the dinner table. The dinner we made is cold because Dad was late, and Mum made us wait and now this…

“Hey, you okay?” Nora’s hand on my arm breaks me from the haze of the memory. I blink a few times to get my full vision back, instead of the blurry daydream state I was in. I’m not going to divulge the childhood drama that lives in my head. If anything, that memory gave me a cold dose of reality and reminded me why I don’t do relationships.

Our main meal arrives, and I place my hand over hers. “I’m fine, hungry. This looks amazing.” I say as the smell of the beef fills my nose.

I’m not sure Nora buys me changing the subject, but we eat in silence for a second. That is until she moans around a mouthful of her beef, eyes rolling back into her head “Oh my god, this is incredible,” she purrs, chewing and licking and swallowing whilst my mind goes straight to the gutter.

“You can’t make those noises, shorty.” I whisper across the table. “Like you said, like is a fancy place.”

She smiles coyly, taking another bite of her beef and moaning again, but only loud enough for me to hear. The gravelly sound goes directly to my cock, that’s swelling in my trousers. “Fuuuuuuck,” I hiss, palming myself under the table. Her eyes spark to life, swirling caramel and chocolate.

She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, following my hand moving under the table and I almost snap, wanting to haul her over to me so I can sink my fingers inside her hot, wet pussy and tell her to be quiet as she comes apart right here in the restaurant. But like I said, it’s a fancy place and I’m not sure I’d be able to stop at that.

“Are you… hard?” she asks on a breathy moan.

I raise an eyebrow at her and cut into my beef to distract my hands that are desperate to touch either myself or her. “What do you think?”

She traces the direction of the blush on her neck with her finger and fucking hell, she’s got the upper hand again. “I think I’ve made you hard.” Her finger stops at the top of her dress, tracing the outline of the lower neckline and drawing my attention to her nipples trying to push through the material.

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