Page 35 of A New Era

I promise him, “The only way she bleeds into our club is physically, and then she disappears.”

He nods slowly. “I hear ya, I believe ya, but it’s not good business taking out women just because they give you a headache.”

My frustration gnaws into a simmering rage. “Who the fuck said anything about taking her out because she annoys the shit outta me? That’s not what I said, old man. But make no mistake, no one’s safe when it comes to keeping this club whole.”

I push up out of my seat and head outside, lighting a cigarette as I walk over to the houses. I intend to go see my girls, but Harper and Gunner catch my eye on their porch at the end of the houses. I didn’t have time to speak to her earlier, but I do now. I hang back and finish my cigarette before joining them. I scoop Gunner up from the blanket Harper has laid out for them with a few of his toys.

“How you doing?” I ask Harper as I plonk my ass in the porch chair with Gunner on my lap.

The kid goes straight for my beard, and I chuckle. Being side-tracked with Gunner, I don’t notice Harper ignoring me until she tosses the toys into the nearby box she brought out with them.

“Harps?”

She takes the chair at the other end of the porch but doesn’t look at me. Something is wrong.

“You okay? You been taking your meds?”

She snorts. “I’m… Did you know Luca ran Lily out of town?”

I inhale deeply. We’ve come a long way, Harper and the family, I don’t want it to slip back to shit. But I won’t lie to her either.

“I did.” She sags in her chair, and I ask, “How did you find out?”

“Lily called. Slade managed to track her down and told her about Gunner. She told me everything. At first, I thought she was spinning a story, but I thought back, and while Lily was always flaky, I did think it strange she just left without a word.”

“How are you feeling about it?”

I don’t agree with what Luca did, but I don’t quite disagree with it either. I can’t fault him for wanting to defend and protect our mother and in the end, Harper. But at the same time, he could have dealt with her in a better way.

“At first, I was pissed. It wasn’t up to Luca to do that. For whatever reason. But then I looked at my son and I realised nothing, absolutely nothing, could force me to leave him no matter what I was threatened with.”

I agree but everyone’s different.

“Have you spoken to Luca?”

“Not yet. I’m trying to process it all before I approach him.”

“You know him, he doesn’t see things like the rest of us. He saw your mom hurting ours, her letting you down, and he acted. I don’t want to tell you how to feel or how to deal with this, but he came from a good place. He cares about you, and he will do anything for you.”

“I know,” she sighs. “I spent years being angry at her, and when she left, I was kinda relieved about it. I had JJ and he was all I needed.”

“Are you saying you need Lily now?”

“Let’s face it, she’s never needed me. I’m at a point in my life where I have more than I ever thought I would. I don’t need her, but I also don’t want any grief. I want her to be able to come back to town if she wants. Do you think Luca will let her?”

“Has she said she wants to come back?”

“She wants to meet Gunner, said she wants to make amends. Leo, I can’t be angry with her for going with your dad because I wouldn’t be here if she hadn’t. Your mom told me she doesn’t hold any grudges. She understands it happened before she and Dad got together.”

“Talk to Luca. Don’t ask him if she can come back, tell him she’s coming back. You don’t have to have his permission, but at the same time, if she upsets you again, I doubt she’ll get another second chance.”

She forgets that she’s embedded in the club through our father, through me and Luca, JJ, and even Sparky as her father-in-law. Shit, her uncle is a brother, and Zach is her cousin. Not one of us wants to see her hurting or slipping back into her illness where no one can reach her.

“I spent my whole childhood wanting a man in my life to make everything okay. I had Slade but I only saw him once, maybe twice a year. Now I can’t turn around without seeing a man who’s now family. I don’t think I’m angry with Luca as such. I’m so used to how the guys around here think and work, it didn’t come as no surprise.”

“So what do you feel about it?”

“I don’t know.”

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