Page 18 of Countdown

“So what is it? Why do you feel you can’t trust us?”

She flinched at his soft question, laced with something that sounded a lot like hurt. “I do trust you—and them.”

“Then what?”

“Vince, I know you want me to talk to you more. Tell you about my past, and the truth is, I want to. At least part of me wants to. It’s just...” She chugged her water. Could telling him really put him in danger? Maybe. Or maybe, it was because once he knew everything, he’d think differently of her.

“Raina?”

She blinked. “Never mind. I’m sorry.” She couldn’t do it. She was too tied to her past. And she hated it. Tears clogged her throat and she swallowed hard to get rid of the tightness.

His hand covered hers and she stilled even as she met his gaze. “Don’t apologize. It’s okay. I promise. You’re right. I’ll stop pushing. You can tell me if and when you’re ready.”

And that seemed to be the signal to stop talking and finish eating, but she wasn’t hungry anymore. Raina got a to-go box. She’d eat the burger for breakfast.

Vince’s phone rang and he snagged it to look at the screen. “I’ve got to take this. You mind?”

“Of course not.”

He slapped the device to his ear. “How is he?”

Raina tried the dessert she’d ordered, thinking something sweet might help loosen the knot in her belly, but she kept circling back to the whole trust thing. She’d been honest when she said keeping the others in the dark wasn’t a lack of trust. Not that they’d betray her confidence or anything like that.

It was an overabundance of fear. Fear that if she told them or Vince everything, they’d insist ondoingsomething with the full intention ofhelping. Which led to the fear of what would happen if she let them.

Or she’d be judged and found guilty. Then again, maybe it wasn’t an either-or situation. Her friends loved her. They’d want to help—or feelobligatedto help—but would they still feel the same about her if she came clean?

The thoughts tumbled over one another faster than the speed of light, and she wanted to scream. To stop them.

She knew that little taunting voice was a lie, but it was one she found herself unable to push away.

However ... this was a whole different scenario.

Vince was trained law enforcement. Maybe if she told him—and gave him an even clearer picture of what Kevin was capable of—he actuallycouldhelp. After all, he’d managedto get the Harrison family taken care of and he was still in one piece.

Tell him.

She really wanted to ignore that insistent little voice.

????

“Uh-huh,” Vince said. “Yeah. Okay. Thanks for the update.” He hung up, his gaze on the far wall, while he processed the fact that his protectee was going to be all right.Thank you, Lord.

“Everything okay?” she asked.

He pulled in a deep breath and met her gaze. “I think so. Our witness had an incident today and almost died on the bathroom floor, but we got him help in record time and he’s going to make it.”

“Oh, Vince, I’m so sorry.” She reached across the table to grip his fingers. “Here I am going on and on about me, and I didn’t even ask you about your day and I’m sor—”

His grip tightened around hers. “Raina, shhh. It’s okay. Really. We think we know what happened. It appears that he had an allergic reaction to the food he ordered. Apparently, he has an allergy to shellfish and didn’t bother to tell them. There was some cross contamination and ... there you go.”

“Oh man.”

“When I was in the bathroom trying to figure out what happened, I noticed the EpiPen on the counter. I grabbed it and jabbed.” He shrugged. “He’s doing better.”

“I’m so glad.”

“I am too. I can’t express how glad.” He really was. He didn’t care for the guy, but he didn’t want him dead. For more than one reason. Having the man die at all would not be good, but freak accident or not, having him die on his watch would have been so very bad any way one looked at it. And—as much as he hated to admit it—he did have some compassion for the man. His history was not one designed to produce an upstandingcitizen. Some people could rise above that, of course, but Fedorov hadn’t been able to.