Page 13 of Whisked Away By the Alien

I reach over and ease the skillet from her hands. “Sten is here to help with whatever we need and in exchange he’ll learn about human customs. Why don’t you take Sadie for a walk down to Mr. Kaplan’s and use his comm to call Dad?”

“I’m not leaving you alone with an alien!”

“He’s not Grud or Coalition.”

“You don’t know that!”

I roll my eyes. “Sure, Mom. The Coalition’s infiltrating our kitchen to learn the secrets behind our recipes. That will help them breach Earth’s defenses.”

“Don’t get flippant with me, Golda Rose.”

“Who’s being flippant? I mean, if they take Aunt Evelyn’s recipe for matzah balls, those things are like lead cannon balls. They could have the next great weapon to win a war!”

“Now you’re being mean. My sister’s matzah balls aren’t that bad.”

“Look me straight in the eyes and say that again, Mom.”

“Rose?” Sten interrupts our side conversation. “If I recall correctly, that’s an Earth flower. I’m sure I’ve seen it as part of my field guide when I studied about Earth. It’s a beautiful flower, though not as beautiful as Golda.”

Oh, he’s smooth, complimenting me in front of my mother.

There’s a shift in the air, like when the coalition forces withdrew from Earth. We could feel… hell, we couldtastefreedom. Right now, I can see the wheels turning in my mother’s mind.

She’s looking him over.

Squinting her eyes.

Assessing his potential.

“You think my Golda is beautiful?”

Boom! There it is! My mom’s tone instantly morphs from Jewish Terminator to plain ol’ Jewish Mom-Who-Wants-Her-Spinster-Daughter married.

Nope, I’m not going to stand here and have my mom embarrass the hell out of me by trying to make a match. Taking her by the shoulders, I turn her around and gently push her out the kitchen door.

“Go. Take Sadie for a walk. Check in with Dad if you want but get out of my kitchen so Sten and I can start cooking.”

“Yourkitchen, young lady?”

“You put me in charge. So, yes, my kitchen.”

“Hmm. I think I’ll take Sadie for a walk. Maybe check in with your dad.”

Didn’t I just say that?

“Don’t leave my kitchen a mess, Golda Rose. And put on something decent.” She waves her hand up and down, encompassing all of me. “A dress or a blouse that makes you look pretty.”

Those gears don’t stop turning in my mom’s head as she assesses the tall hunky guy standing in the kitchen doorway.

“He’s only here for a week, Mom. And I’m guessing he’s not Jewish.”

“You don’t know that. Not all Jews are Caucasian. We’re a religion, not a race. There are Jews all over the world. Black. White. Asian. Native American—”

“World, Mom. Not Universe.”

“Who made you the authority on where Jews can and can’t be?”

“Fine, Mom. After you call Dad, walk to the rabbi’s house and ask him.” That should keep her busy for an hour or two.

---