Page 71 of Zirkov

“You and I…. I mean… we had sex, Z. Using both of your cocks.”

“My mating cock rises often, for many females. That is the problem. I will never know which female is my sholani. I can eliminate the mated females, but the rest…” Zirkov shook his head. “The gods only give us one heartmate and a mating cock that signals when we’ve found her.”

“This side effect doesn’t have to be a bad thing, Z. Since your mating cock rises easily, you’re not limited. You could have any woman you want, similar to human men.”

“You don’t understand.” With the back of two fingers, he traced along her jaw. “My mating cock rose for you the day I met you, Magdalena, but that’s happened with many females over the years. It is not my soul reacting to yours, but to a drug I stopped taking over a decade ago. How am I to know which female is my sholani, if my mating cock rises for every female?”

His fingers brushed through her hair and down the back of her neck. “If I were to mate the female not destined to be my sholani and then I meet my true heartmate, what happens? I may not recognize her as my sholani, but what if I do? Do I leave the one I pledged myself to or ignore the one I was destined to be with? No, Magdalena, I am not fated to have a sholani. The gods are punishing me for breaking the most sacred rule for a zyanthan warrior. To have honor above all else.”

“Don’t talk like that. You have plenty of honor. More than anyone I know. There has to be something you can do. Maybe talk to the doctors on Tunzen, since the drug came from there.”

“There is nothing more to be done. Only accept. I am a content male. I have my work and my friends.”

He said he was content, but she saw the longing on his face. He wanted more out of life.

“I don’t walk away from the people I care about, Z. Granted, I’ll get dragged out of here by my heels when the DAA arrests me, but I’ll still be with you in spirit.”

“I will not let them take you.”

“You’re the Commander of GI7. You can’t stand in their way without risking your position. Don’t worry, Z. I don’t plan to go down without a fight.”

“You would make a fine warrior on Zyan.”

“Like you?”

He began to walk away, but she grabbed his upper arm. “Every zyanthan I’ve met says you were an excellent warrior. Did the Council of Warriors strip you of your title because of the drug?”

“When they learned of the drug, the council said I hadn’t earned my tattoos, that I’d cheated. I ignored them because they were wrong. I had earned my tattoos and my title. And the gods were already punishing me in their own way. Then I saw the disappointment on my father’s face. He didn’t say a word, but he didn’t need to. At that moment, I knew enduring the gods’ punishment wouldn’t restore my honor. The next day, the inker removed my tattoos, and I left Izoran.”

She cupped his face in his hands. “I’m sorry for your loss. My opinion may not count for much these days, but I think you’re full of honor, Z.”

“Thank you, Magdalena. It means a lot that you don’t hold my past against me.”

“Of course I wouldn’t! Is that what happened with your father? Did he disown you?” When Zirkov’s face didn’t ease, she added, “Never mind, don’t answer. I know what it’s like to have a parent who doesn’t like you.”

He removed her hand from his cheek and kissed the inside of her palm. “Your mother was a fool to not recognize the treasure she had in you.”

Treasure?

“My father did not disown me. As a warrior, he was offended by what I’d done and needed to come to terms with my actions. He realized he’d failed in his duty as a father. It has taken time to repair our relationship, but we have. In recent years, I’ve heard him boast about me.”

“Because you’re the Commander of GI7?”

“Because I did not give up. A warrior never gives up.”

“I’m starting to learn that.” Maggie leaned her head against his arm. “That’s a lot to go through. Illegal drug or not, you worked hard to become a warrior. But I’m glad everything worked out with your father. The right support from family can make all the difference in a person’s life. I see it with many of the women who return to Earth.”

“Life rarely goes as planned, but every experience provides an opportunity to make us stronger. After I lost my title, I enlisted in the military as a soldier, not a warrior. I’ve never known anything as boring, but I found honor there, so I could not complain.”

Zirkov never complained. That was one of many things that always impressed her about him.

“It doesn’t sound like you were happy.”

“I found it difficult following the orders of third and second leads with insufficient knowledge of strategy, weapons, or even hand-to-hand combat. I prefer making my own rules.”

She’d noticed that about him, too. He tolerated working with the DAA, mostly because he needed their permission to remain on Earth. Earth offered a new haven for scientists and others fleeing the Coalition. People such as Dekar who’d been instrumental in the Coalition’s downfall.

“I come from a powerful and wealthy family. Despite my father’s displeasure with me, he introduced me to a councilman in Galactic Intelligence who said he would keep me and my history in mind. I left that meeting convinced he’d only met me as a favor to my father.

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