Page 53 of Spreading Her Wings

I gave the boy a weak smile before making my way back to my car. Once inside, I sat there with the engine off. It was silent, and my thoughts scrambled in my mind. I shuffled through every memory for any recollection of the party tonight, as if I would be able to just show up. Would I? What would he say if I did?

The drive home was defeating, and for every mile I got closer to my house, I was heavier with dread. I wanted to find him, but where could he be? He wasn’t at home, Logan and Simone’s, or Ash and Jackson’s. He wasn’t at Pour Decisions. I didn’t know Sky or any of their other friends, and it wasn’t like I could text Andy and ask her if she knew about the party without breaking the news to her in the worst way.

Turning my car off in the driveway, I saw it. A white envelope propped against the front door. My chest fluttered, and a wave of nausea was acrid in the back of my throat.

I didn’t lock the car behind me when I hurried up the steps, grabbing the envelope and tearing it open. It was a clipped stack of white papers.Annulment for Dissolution of Marriage.

My hands shook as I slid out the yellow piece of notebook paper I recognized from the pad in the office at Auston’s bar.

Katie,

I love you with every bit of me, enough to let you out of this if you want it. You will forever bemine, but if you don’t want me to be yours, I won’t force it. I’ve signed the papers. It’s your choice.

I trust you.

I love you.

Auston

The papers fluttered to the ground, followed by my knees on the wood porch. Tears flooded down my cheeks as I dropped back onto my heels, wrapping my arms around myself. I looked at the papers on the porch, picking up one sheet. The blue signature felt like pins and needles against my fingers, and I choked on a sob.

“He was here?”

The music was loud, and for the first time, I was the one wishing it was just a bit quieter. I took another shot, and just as I swallowed, there was a light touch along my back. Choking, I coughed and the gin burned my throat.

“You okay?” Sky stood there staring at me, fluttering her eyelashes. There was a day when that look would have me dragging her back to my office and using her intentionally messy blonde hair as a handle. It didn’t do that tonight, though.

Shaking my head, I poured another shot. “I fucked up. I miss her.” I thought about signing the papers and the way it had physically hurt my hand to do so, but the regret of just dropping them on her porch made me sick with worry. How did she react when she saw them? Whether she was relieved or crushed, it killed me.

Sky tilted her head. “Your sister’s friend? Is this because you took her those papers earlier?” I narrowed my eyes. How did she know about those? “Simone told me. She’s pretty upset about it.”

I swallowed the shot and winced, reaching for the bottle. “Yeah, the papers. She’s more than my sister’s friend.” I lookedat her, tears I didn’t fight welling in my eyes. “I was in love with her. Iamin love with her.”

She reached for the bottle, a look of nearly envious judgment on her face. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough of those?”

“Oh, you’re telling me how much I should drink? That’s really rich coming from you, Sky.” The woman had been able to drink me under a table the entire way through college, and up until she’d moved, she made sure to remind me of it any time she could.

She rolled her eyes. “Fuck off, Auston. I’m just trying to help, okay?” Her grip on my shoulder got slightly firmer. “Don’t drink yourself into a stupor like your dad did just because of some chick.”

My vision blurred, and I jerked away from her grasp, quickly standing from the chair. “How dare you?” I cringed, thinking about the way my dad would drink whiskey like it was water and the way he’d beat my sister when he did. He never touched me, but he almost killed Andy. He wouldn’t hurt the person who was supposed to carry on his family name. That was me. Bile rose in my throat, causing my already burning esophagus to scream with discomfort.

“You know I don’t mean… I just meant he used to do stupid things when he drank too much. Don’t get so drunk that you do something stupid too.”

She turned away from me to walk back into the crowd, but I reached out and gripped her arm above her elbow. “I’ve done a lot of stupid things in my life. Nothing with Katie was stupid.”

“Putting those papers on her porch was. Letting her go would be.”

I dropped her arm, reaching for the bottle that was no longer there. Sky gripped it in her hand, tilting it back and taking a swig from the opening. She was right. “Fuck!”

Walking towards the door, Sky scrambled after me. “Where are you going?”

“To get those damn papers back. I’m not giving her up.” I stormed past the bar and down the hallway to the office, grabbing my jacket and keys from the hook on the wall and stomping out the back door to my car.

Sky stayed on my heels. “Auston, stop. Do you hear me? I saidstop!” Her voice was shrill.

I froze in my place, whipping around to face her. “What?” I snapped.

“You’re fucking wasted. I’m not letting you drive anywhere, andnowis probably not the best time to go get your girl.” The way she gestured to me with a full sweep of her arm from head to toe let me know I wasn’t exactly the most put together.

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