Page 31 of Better Day

Her laugh breaks out as I hold my breath, contemplating what was said. Surely, he didn’t mean what it sounded like. I mean, I have my suspicions, but I don’t want to believe it. It’d just be too cliché, the senator having an affair with his assistant. Jason might be a lot of things, but he isn’t stupid, is he? That could hurt his career if it ever got out.

“I look after him exceptionally well, don’t you worry. We just need to get the job done. The more dollars we can get in it, the more it feeds the other side of things that he is gaining traction in.” Why do they seem to be talking in riddles about whatever this is. It’s obvious they are talking about Jason, but I just can’t help but think that not everything is as it seems.

“Oh, got to go, he’s messaging me now. The dumb bimbo that he keeps hanging off his arm is missing. Not that I understand why he keeps her around. I satisfy that man in my bedroom as well as the office, so she is just a waste of space. But of course, now I need to find her. Like I’m her fucking babysitter. I couldn’t care less if she fell off a cliff.”

“Duty calls. Better run along now.” Both of them laugh as I hear the party noise wafting back outside as they must be opening the door again.

My silence returns, and I’m left sitting here wondering what the hell that was all about, and as much as I hate to admit it, I feel stupid. I’ve been suspecting it for a while, that Jason is sleeping with Camilla, and as stupid as that would be, it sounds awfully like it’s happening and has been for a while now. Trying not to get upset, it explains a lot. Well, I guess I know why he is never interested in sex with me when he is getting his fill somewhere else. Or should I say, he is filling someone else. I guess one thing is certain, it’s time for me to move on. If he doesn’t want me, then I’ll find a man who does. One who treats me like I deserve.

Standing and trying to plaster that fake smile back on, my mind is replaying the other words they were saying as I head back inside. The part about me was obvious, but the rest didn’t sound great to me, although I have no idea what it was, it just had a dirty tinge to it. There have been a few things that haven’t made sense lately. Like the step up in security around me and the house. Phone calls and hushed voices in the middle of the night. Last-minute trips that have been happening more frequently. I was just putting it all down to part of the campaign and things I didn’t need to worry about. But looking back, maybe I should’ve been paying more attention.

Knowing I can’t stand out here any longer, I take a deep breath and enter the building again and make my way to the room.

Casually walking toward Jason on the other side of the room, I see Camilla making a straight line for me with haste.

“Where have you been, Leah?” Ignoring her, I just keep walking. “You know you can’t just disappear for half the night.” Who is she kidding? I was gone for thirty minutes at the most.

“Fuck off, Camilla,” I hiss at her, and it has her stopping dead in her tracks. Her mouth opens and no words come out. It’s the first time I’ve ever spoken to her like that, and I guarantee it won’t be the last. I’m not going to sit back and take all this shit. As angry as I am, my mind is still trying to work out what she was talking about back in the garden. One thing I do know, though, it didn’t sound great.

“I’m leaving, I don’t feel well,” I spit at Jason before he even has time to open his mouth.

“Leah.” The tone in his voice tells me he is pissed, like I give a fuck.

Walking toward the door, I hear my name being called again in Camilla's high-pitched voice, but I just keep walking. I can hear her heels clattering on the floor as she tries to keep up. Of course, he has sent his lap dog to follow me.

Reaching the doorman, I’m sure he can tell by the look on my face and the way I’m walking that I need his help.

“Taxi, madam?”

“Please and quickly.” Nodding, he opens the door and raises his hand. Before I even have time to think, a taxi is pulling up in front of me and he is opening the car door for me. Sliding into the back seat as Camilla bursts through the outside doors, I just smile at her and wave as the door slams, and we pull away from the building.

I can feel my bag vibrating against my thigh. My phone is blowing up, and it’s either Jason or Camilla or both. Ignoring them feels like a win in an argument they don’t even know we're having. I don’t even care and can’t be bothered to give them any clue.

Just staring aimlessly out the window, my mind is racing, and when I made up the excuse to Jason of being sick, I think I just preempted what was about to happen. My stomach is rolling, and the closer we get to the apartment, the more I feel like I’m about to vomit.

Quickly tapping my card to pay, I’m out the door and up the front steps. Pushing my key into the lock and trying to get the door open. Tears are building at the same time, and my body is about to break down.

What a sight I must be. On the bathroom floor in my satin gown, right next to the toilet bowl, I lose anything I ate today into it.

I'm just shattered.

My life is unraveling around me.

I can’t see him, not tonight. Sliding my phone out of my bag that’s lying on the floor beside me, I unlock it, making sure I’m not looking at any of the words. I do a voice-to-text message to Jason that he should stay away tonight. I could be contagious, and he doesn’t want to catch this.

Then I shut down my phone, not waiting for any reply.

I’m not sure how long I’ve been sitting here, but my ass is now numb and telling me to move. Pulling myself up on the vanity, the picture of the woman in the mirror is not appealing. There are black streaks down my cheeks and my lipstick is missing. The tears have been falling for a while, and the makeup is now all over my face, making me look like a horror show character.

Fuck you, Jason. Fuck you!

* * *

Waking slowly, I hope I’m not back living in the nightmare and that everything from the last two days that has happened is instead the dream. But the stale musty smell that awakens my senses tells me that’s not the case. I’m in the house with Ghost, and that is a bigger sense of relief than what I was expecting it to be.

Time to get on with it. No going back now. Forwards is the only option, one day at a time.

* * *

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