Page 39 of The Wrong Man

Swallowing a lump forming in my throat, I felt ill myself. Maybe he was just sick. “Oh? Wh-what’s wrong?”

“Ah, maybe the flu or something. I’m going to sleep over at the apartment. You know, rest up.” Within two strides, he was back at the front door as if he hadn’t even come inside.

“D-do you want me to make you soup? You can sleep here. You said my bed was more comfortable.”

Eli paused before opening the door and held my face in both his hands. They were cold and his gaze held a distance I’d never seen before. Stroking his rough thumbs over my cheeks, he paused for a moment before his deep bass murmured through his chest. “No, baby girl. I think I should stay at my place. I don’t want to get you sick, too. I’ll let you know when I’m feeling better.” He gathered me into a suffocating hug, his chin digging into my scalp, before peeling back. Just as he stepped onto the front stoop, he turned his head slightly and said, “I love you, Essa.” Then, he was gone.

For the first night in a long while, I slept afraid of a break-in.

* * *

Winter break came the next week and Christmas was in a few days. Eli said he was “sick” with the flu. My stomach stayed twisted in knots, not knowing what was truly wrong. Since the day he hugged me goodbye, we hadn’t seen each other. His responses to my texts were coming fewer and farther between and only focused on something to give information, not sharing anything. A few nights, I cried myself to sleep. Piper came over two nights to hang out, and I had confessed everything to her about how I was feeling.

But now, it was a day off from school, with nothing to do except wallow in my messy house. Wandering around the living room, I looked at my phone again, my late-night goodnight message to Eli on read. The terror that I was losing him was about to claw out of my skin.

Something’s definitely wrong

Piper

Like I said, go over there and just make him open the door

See if there’s someone else there

I can’t just barge in uninvited!

Y not???? He’s your bf! He said ilu. That’s a key, imo.

Taking a deep breath, I focused on heating up some chicken noodle soup and putting it in a container for him, then gathered up some flu remedies I’d bought from the pharmacy. While I drove to his place, my fingers gripped the wheel as I practiced some lines I would say. There were questions always hovering on the tip of my tongue, but asking them out loud would make me seem jealous, insecure, too young. He’d think I was naïve and not trusting. Or the main question,“Is there something wrong?”was always met with the same answer,“Not at all.”

Walking down the side yard to his full glass front door, I spotted him lounging on his sofa watching TV, sans shirt. His apartment was filled with takeout bags, clothing piles, and dirty dishes. It wasn’t like him to eat fast food so much. Relief washed through me, settling some of the fear inside when I didn’t see anyone else with him. Pulling my shoulders back, I knocked on his door.

Eli’s head whipped to spot me, his eyes wide with surprise. A tiny smile crept over the corners of his mouth, but dropped as he stood to walk over, his gray sweatpants hanging low on his hips. Eli stood back to let me inside and I thrust the soup container at him. “Hey, Essa. What are you doing here? You could have told me you were coming.”

Essa. He never called me that. “I didn’t think you’d pick up my call or answer my text...”

Setting the soup down on a crowded dining table, he rubbed his jaw, now filled with more of a beard than his usual stubble. “Of course, I would…” Pulling out his phone from his pocket, he flipped through it. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t see your text last night. Fell asleep early. Been sick, you know.”

Glancing around, I didn’t see any tissues or medicines. Nothing made me think he’d been ill. “Are you okay?”

Eli’s head followed mine, then he clasped a hand to his stomach. “Oh, just stomach upset stuff. Nothing I want to give you.”

Just when I was about to bust out in anger and demand to know what his problem was, he placed a large palm on my shoulder and said, “Adon is having people over at his place for Christmas. I’ll pick you up Saturday, okay?”

“Uh… okay.” He turned me to face his front door again and ushered me through the threshold before letting go. “Can you hang out?”

His eyes hit the ceiling as he sighed. “No, baby. I don’t want to get you sick. I’ll see you Saturday at 8. I love you. And thanks for the soup.”

As I wandered back up to my car, the hollow words he left me with stewed the acid in my stomach hotter than before I visited. But, I tried to focus on the fact that he invited me to his family’s holiday celebration. That should be some comfort. It meant I was meaningful in his life if he invited me to be with his family on Christmas. Right?

Saturday arrived, and I was looking forward to spending time with Eli. I’d convinced myself that he had indeed been ill and now, surely, he was better. He’d even texted me more the previous couple of days, and I was excited to share in the celebrations with him.

Christmas Day was spent with Piper and her family, which was chaotic. Her parents were divorced, so we went to each of their houses separately. Her mother was an alcoholic and mean. Her father kept insulting Piper’s mother, then hit on me before the afternoon was over.

“See why I hate them?” Piper said as she dropped me back at my house to wait for Eli.

“Oh. Eli’s already here.” As we pulled up, Eli’s large frame was in the driveway outside of his car. He was gesturing emphatically with his hands as he spoke with Eddie, who was actually wearing a sweater. Eddie seemed to be looking everywhere but at my boyfriend. “With Eddie.”

“Huh. That’s weird. Wonder what happened.” Piper tugged on my coat as I continued to stare at the scene next to my house. “Hey. Good luck today. It seems like maybe he was sick and now is feeling better. At least you know there’s no one else. Maybe today things will be back to normal.”

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