Page 150 of Alive At Night

I nodded, quickly snatching the glass of water that a passing waiter had placed on our table.

“Fuck no.” He leaned forward, resting both palms on the table’s white linen. He hissed the next words beneath his breath, voice slithering down my spine. “Do I need to remind you of what I said the other night while you were getting your pretty pussy fucked for the first time?”

Suddenly, my lungs felt two sizes too small for my body, and the fireplace at my back sparked way too much heat. Sweat tickled the nape of my neck. I crossed my legs, but that only reminded me how Julian had my underwear in his pocket, and I was left feeling exposed and aching for him.

“I love making you blush,” Julian commented with a light chuckle, the fire melting from his eyes again as he leaned back in his chair. His gaze plummeted to my bodice and then quickly back to my face. “I can’t wait to see that color cover the rest of your body.”

“So this is…” I started, bringing the topic back around before I lost the ability to breathe entirely. I wanted confirmation of what this was. I couldn’t decide on the right words, though, so Julian filled in for me.

“This is dating, Juni.” The smile he gave me was easy. Nothing between Julian and I had ever been easy, but ironically, this was. Julian spoke as though nothing had ever been easier than this conversation. “Not a date. Dating. How’s that sound?”

Dating. Not a date, dating.

“That’s acceptable, I suppose.”

When Julian began to frown, I tossed him a wink. But that didn’t stop him from having something to say. Ofcourseit didn’t.

“Acceptable?” He rolled his eyes in response, lips twitching. “Baby, I know you’re used to mediocrity considering your previous boyfriends, but we don’t doacceptablehere. You deserve more than that.”

I took a quick sip of my water, fumbling with the glass a little and spilling a splash on the table. Julian had just said the wordboyfriend, and while I understood that was the entire concept of what he had been explaining with the whole exclusively dating thing, I hadn’t expected to hear that word so soon. And I hadn’t expected to feel so incredibly giddy about it.

“Okay, Juni?” Julian went on. “So either stop it with the lies or tell me what you want to change so that this isn’t just…acceptable.” He wrinkled his nose as he said the last word.

“I don’t want to change anything,” I said breathlessly. “I don’t want to change anything at all.”

It was still a little unbelievable to me that we were here, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Julian nodded and tucked his sharp tongue away. For now. He reached across the table, sliding his hand over mine. I laced my fingers through his, my heart beating so loudly that I worried we’d drawn attention.

But we didn’t. Because no one knew. No one knew who we were or what this simple touch meant. They didn’t know that we were Juniper and Julian, two people who spent years being too confused and scared of their feelings that they latched onto playing a little game instead. A game that was predictable, as equally humorous as it was hurtful, but most importantly—fake.

I’d immediately known that taking Julian to Sofia’s wedding would be disastrous because suddenly, it wasn’t a game anymore, it ironicallywasn’tan act, and there wasn’t a script. We’d flown too close to something too real, something bright and warm like the sun, and everyone always warned against that, didn’t they?

But now we were here, and the sweat sprinkling my back from the heat was surprisingly comforting. And I liked that not knowing what to expect felt safe for the first time in a long time. There wasn’t a script, but there were lines I’d always wanted to hear. And Julian Briggs was hitting all of them.

He looked down at the menu before him, still grasping my hand. And when he glanced up again, his expression was serious.

“I have to admit something, Juniper.”

My forehead creased as my thoughts chased worries around in my brain.

But then Julian said, “I’ve never had gnocchi.”

A smile broke out on my face so wide that I felt it crack. “How can you go twenty-seven years without experiencing gnocchi?”

“Closer to twenty-eight years,” Julian muttered, though he was grinning back.

“That doesnothelp your case,” I said, laughter following my words.

Although, the reminder of Julian’s upcoming birthday brought me back down to earth. We were living in a bubble where nothing existed except us and this date and heated glances. But next weekend, we would be going to Whitebridge to celebrate his birthday with his family, and other people were going to burst through that bubble.

Julian and I hadn’t talked about work or family or breaking out of our bubble. We’d just wrapped it tighter around us. For the most part, I’d ignored Gemma, feigning a busy work schedule. But she would be there next weekend, and I didn’t know what I’d say. I was sleeping with my best friend’s brother. Dating him. And obviously, I needed to come clean about that.

The rest of our meal was delightful. Julian tried the gnocchi and approved, although I doubted he would say anything even if he didn’t. Meanwhile, I had a delicious plate of the world’s cheesiest pasta. Julian smiled as he watched me eat the last noodle, feeling like I was about to explode but too happy to care. And unsurprisingly, we were able to make it through dinner without any broken bones.

Not that I thought that would be necessary. No man had ever looked at me like Julian seemed to think they would. Only him, and I was definitely okay with that.

As we slid into Julian’s car at the end of our date, his hand returned to my thigh. His fingers traced my skin the entire way home, and all I could do was clench my legs tighter in response. The thrum of anticipation was heady in my veins as we pulled into the parking garage below his apartment building. It only increased as Julian led me to the elevator, every step making my body pulse with need.

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