Page 109 of Alive At Night

I closed the distance between us, not wanting this conversation to be overheard. “I fucking crave it,” I said in a low voice. “But I’m afraid of what it’ll do to me if I let it. What it will do to you. What it will do to the people around us.”

“Julian…”

She said my name like a warning, and I understood. My blood was running hot, and I needed to find a way to cool it. But Juni’s stare was equally bold and audacious. She was flashing warning signals while simultaneously daring me to continue.

“It’s not about me, Juniper,” I pleaded. “It’s not about what I want. You have to understand.”

“Oh, I understand. I know you, Julian.” She shrugged, pulling her hand away to create a void where her touch vanished. I watched as her shoulders deflated. “You’ve been pushing me away for years. It’s not like I’m not used to it.”

“Juniper, I—” My words cut off at her stony glare, and I knew anything I had to say would fall flat.

“You haven’t changed,” she muttered with a sigh. Disappointment was written all over her face.

“Yeah…I’m still the worst.” I stared back at her, sinking into that deep look in her eyes.

“Look who’s being self-deprecating now,” she breathed, but her lips twitched slightly in amusement.

“Well, it’s true.”

My mood dropped as I reminded myself that this was our reality. While I’d lusted after Juniper for years, she’d been thinking of me asthe worstfor many more. Why would sheeven think it would be a good idea to continue what we started the other night? Juni had made no indication that she wanted me in the way I wanted her. She seemed eager to start something physical, sure, but I doubted that would be enough for me. Once we started, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stop.

“You’ve never liked me, Juni,” I reminded her softly, trying not to sound so goddamn sad about it but likely failing. “Remember? What happens when you realize that you still don’t?”

I’d avoided letting myself get close to her for all these years for a reason.

Those brilliant brown eyes blinked at me, almost like she wastryingto remember. Then she abruptly sucked in as if it all came flooding back.

“I told you, Julian. I told you at Sofia’s wedding that I liked you. And then, if I remember correctly, you made me admit that nothing about that night was fake. So it wasn’t a lie. But you know what…it doesn’t even matter.” She looked down, pushing me away with her words, and I supposed I deserved that, even if it fucking hurt. “Not anymore.”

“It doesn’t?”

“No, I have a date I need to get to.”

I took a step back, feeling sucker punched with that information. “You have a date you need to get to,” I repeated.

Juniper looked down at herself thoughtfully. “You didn’t think I put this dress on for you, did you?”

I honestly hoped she had.

“Who did you put the dress on for, Juni?” I asked through gritted teeth, falling back into my desk chair like she’d pushed me. I spun around to face my computer. How could I keep staring at her when she was looking so perfect for someone else? But I waited, bated breath, for her to answer.

“Noah,” she said, her voice sweet. “He asked me to dinner tonight.”

Oh,fuckno.

I turned back around with such force that I had to plant my feet on the ground to stop the momentum of my chair.

“Excuse me…what?”

CHAPTERTWENTY-SIX

juniper

IDEFINITELY SHOULD NOT be enjoying the anger on Julian’s face this much.

But I had an inkling that it didn’t stem from irritation like I used to believe. This wasn’t him trying to gatekeep his friends. This was something far more than that, and in my personal opinion, something Julian deserved to experience at the moment.

Jealousy looked good on Julian Briggs.