Page 133 of Our Scorching Summer

She drapes herself against the handrailing in the stall. “I’ve been scorned in the past.”

Chuck was the first guy I’d ever felt interested in, the first one I brought home to meet my parents. Top of his class, an absolute heartthrob with the most divine blue eyes. He was only a year older than me and looked moments away from walking onto the set of a whiskey commercial.

Suave and sexy.

Everyone wanted Chuck, but Chuck, for whatever reason at the time, wantedme.

“The first time I brought him home, my sister called me out when we kissed in the kitchen while cleaning up.”

Even so many years later, the day is a vivid replay in my mind. The way he pushed me against the sink, smothering my lips with his. How my heart raced as quick as a bird’s wings fighting through strong wind. The taste of my mother’s mashed potatoes still faintly on his tongue.

“Fucking siblings!” Ren says. “My younger sister would’ve done the same thing.”

“Tell me about it. I thought my parents were going to disown me right then and there, but they shrugged it off.” I’d wanted them to care and get mad like the parents in the movies did. “So, as any wise fifteen-year-old does, I thought,Fuck it, and kissed him right there at the table again.”

“The origin story of a badass.”

“Always starts with some asshole, doesn’t it?”

There wasn’t a rebellious bone in my body back then. All my time was spent writing silly stories with no grand plans beyond that. On the other hand, Chuck was weeks away from a banking internship before starting his freshman year at college. That’s probably why my parents welcomed him with open arms; he was someone to care for their directionless daughter.

“Before I met Klaus, I had one of those too. Engaged and everything. It took one wake-up call from a friend to realize I was more in love with the idea of love than the douchebag who made me believe what we had was enough.”

“I’m assuming you and Klaus aren’t actually neighbors?” I wipe, finish my hovering, and flush the toilet on the way up.

Ren snickers. “We had casual sex for years in college,” she confesses. “Somewhere, somehow, it turned into my greatest friendship. I hate labels,buthe insisted there was no one else better suited for him. Almost nine years later, and here we are. He makes me feel alive even if he’s a bit silly.”

Could that become me and Nico?

Casual sex turned into a label-less relationship?

Is that even something I could manage?

My curiosity itches for more. “Are you happy?”

She nods. “Yes, I think so. What about you? With Nico? He’s gorgeous.”

I don’t bother rehearsing the same we’re-just-friends routine. Maybe we’re exactly what she and Klaus are. “For the first time in my life, I feel like I can be entirely myself with someone.”

“Nothing like it.”

True. I’ve been coming to terms with the fact ever since we landed in London. Nico makes me feel alive. He makes me feel like every part of me, the good and the ugly, are worthy of being cherished.

“Let’s get the fuck out, or we’ll start smelling like whatever died in here.” We topple out of the bathroom, and in the shortest breath, Ren’s swept away into the sea of people.

Great.

My eyes do their best to locate Nico, Ren, Klaus, or any of the people we met earlier this evening, but I have no luck between the strobe lights and the onslaught of smoke. I reach for my phone and only need a second to notice the two small bars of service. I hope for the best as I dial Nico’s number.

There’s no way he’s going to hear this, but I know he has his phone on him.

The ringing bleats in my ear, barely audible beneath the heavy bounce of house music from the speakers.

For fuck’s sake.

Lily

Where are you?

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