Page 114 of Possession

His touch is firm and controlling. His hold is impossibly stout. There’s no way I’ll escape.

These hands that have touched me everywhere. They’ve been firm with me, cared for me, and even controlled me in the most private and carnal ways possible.

Stockholm syndrome floats through my mind again, because I’ve loved most of it.

But I don’t love this.

His lips brush my ear, and his words hit me in a whisper, not unlike when we’re at home and he doesn’t want the cameras to pick up what he’s saying. “Baby, I need you to listen. Let me explain. Trust me, this is not something I wanted to do right now. I wanted to wait until the time was right.”

“The time was right?” I echo, not at all in a whisper. “You work for the Marino Cartel. You report to Alamandos. How did you have a career with the government?”

“Not past, baby.” His body tenses around mine. “Present.”

I can barely form words, and my mind tries to make sense of what he’s saying. “I don’t understand.”

“Chica.” That word has come to hold many meanings. Sometimes it’s informal, sarcastic, or even laced with frustration. This time it’s none of those. That word is completely and totally reverent—laced with something more than it ever has been. He inhales, dragging his lips across my temple. “You don’t know how many times I’ve had you in my arms thinking of this moment. Dreading it and wanting it at the same time. I’m not scared of anything, Landyn, but this fucking terrifies me.”

Tears well in my eyes, and my words tremble. “You’re scaring me.”

“I’ll tell you, but you have to trust me. Swear to God, Landyn, every single thing I’ve done since I laid eyes on you has been for you. To protect you. I didn’t mean for this,” his hand on my neck falls to my chest and presses in over my heart, “to happen. I did every single thing I could to stay away from you and still keep you safe. It was so fucking hard. In the end, it was impossible.” His hand comes back to my chin to tip my face to his. Only genuine honesty bleeds from his eyes. I realize this look on him is new. And that scares me more than anything. “This was not supposed to happen.”

I say nothing.

There’s nothing left to say, at least not from me.

“I’m a special agent, baby. I work for the Drug Enforcement Administration.”

My eyes fall shut. “Oh my God.”

“Yeah,” he agrees. “And the fact I’m telling you this right now puts my life at risk. But this trip was not optional, and there was no way I’d leave you behind. If this gets out—if I get made in any way—I’m dead. And my guess is, it won’t be quick or painless. Your life has been in my hands this long, baby, but right now I’m putting mine in yours. You trusted me to take care of you. Tell me I’m doing the right thing. I need to trust you too.”

* * *

Brax

I’m not lying.

Well, not anymore.

But I’m really not shitting her about the trust. I don’t know what I’ll do if she turns me away. I don’t even want to think about the possibility that she’ll run after learning the truth. If she doesn’t accept me for who I am, then I’m going to have more heartache than just figuring out how to keep her safe.

“So, um.” Her erratic heart races against my chest. “You’re not a drug dealer?”

“I’m the very opposite of a drug dealer, baby. I’ve got many goals in this undercover operation. Taking down the Marino family is just one of them.”

“You lied this whole time.” The tears that race down her face might as well be a knife to my gut. “You pretended to be someone you’re not.”

“No.” I let go of her wrists to turn her in my arms. She doesn’t dodge me to escape. I think it’s pure shock from what I’ve told her, but I’ll take it. I cup her face in my hands and look into her confused, hurt blues. “I’m the same man who’s been right here with you the whole time. I have a different job than you thought. It’s the only lie I’ve told you.”

Her lower lip trembles as I swipe the tears from her cheeks with my thumbs. It kills me that of all the things she should be afraid of, her fear is focused on me. “What do you mean taking down the Marinos is only one of your goals?”

I pull in a deep breath and shake my head. “It’s a long story, and we’re going to have to leave in a few minutes.”

She pulls out of my hold and takes two steps back. “I’m not going anywhere until you tell me everything.”

I take a step toward her, because I need to make her understand. “Chica—”

She puts a hand up to stop me. If tears could turn from hurt to anger in a heartbeat, she just proved it could happen. “Don’t fuckingchicame. And don’t you dare tell me to trust you again. I didn’t think I could trust anyone, but I trusted you.”

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