Page 39 of Heir Of Sun And Moon
“Because no one besides Alexi is nice to me. He was the only one who cared ab—” I falter, taking a breath. “Can you just please tell me why you’re here?” I’m desperate to understand the reason why this normal man wastes his evenings with me, ones where he isn’t even duty-bound to do so.
“I told you. You weren’t what I was expecting,” he says like it answers the question. When I gesture for him to continue, he huffs out a laugh and adds, “I was intrigued by you that day. You’re something of a… myth around the castle. People know you exist, but the king has done a good job of making it sound like you’ve almost gone insane from grief.”
Shame slams into me at his words, flattening me like a boulder let loose from the top of a hill. I’m nothing more than a joke to him and everyone else in the castle.
“I see,” I say through gritted teeth. “You’re here to report back to the others.” The anger in me feels dark this time, like a beast waking up from hibernation. I stand up from the couch and move to the opposite side of the tea table, away from the guard. My chest lifts and falls as my breathing starts to pick up. This makes so much more sense. He isn’t here because of kindness or whatever other sweet emotion I thought to conjure up.
“Wait, I didn’t— Fuck, I didn’t mean it like that.” He scrambles to get the words out, jumping up much more swiftly than I did. Somehow this makes me even angrier, considering he is so much bigger than I am and was starting from the floor. He moves to take a step closer, but I counter by stepping back, nearly moving onto the balcony.
“I think you should go. You have plenty to report back on now. What with my inability to button my own dresses and my stupidity in not knowing that flame gems are real. You can even tell everyone how I didn’t know how to play children’s games!” My eyes water as my hands fist at my sides, nails digging into my palms. I hate feeling this way, like a naive fool. I hate that the first person to give me an ounce of attention was only doing so as ajokeand that I didn’t realize until it was too late.
“Please, you don’t understand. I misspoke—”
“Get. Out.” The breach he had created near my heart earlier with his caring words and actions frosts back over. I can almost see it, the shadowy ice swirling around inside of me and snuffing out the normally glowing and warm magic there.
The guard opens his mouth again to speak in protest but is interrupted by a deep growl rumbling through the tower. The hairs on the back of my neck stand as I look behind him to where Bella prowls down the stairs. She rounds the final spiral and jumps over the remaining few steps, landing in a crouched position on the ground. Her canines glisten in the moonlight as she snarls at the guard, that deep rumble from her throat so dominant that I swear I feel it rattle my brain.
I do not fear her—never her—but I know it will be messy if she attacks this guard on my behalf. Slowly, I walk towards her, backing the guard up at the same time. Bella stalks around him, mirroring each of his steps with one of her own until she is facing him with me at her side.
“Holy shit, that’s a huge fox,” he whispers, hands raised in front of him as he freezes in place.
“She will not attack you if you leave,” I snap. The guard’s wide eyes bounce back and forth between Bella and I before he swallows and begins to back up. Reaching behind him blindly, he opens the door and pauses there. Bella releases another warning growl as my hand rests on the top of her head. The guard surveys Bella again before moving his gaze back over to me.
There isn’t as much fear there as I expect. No, my gut says that there looks to be something like amazement in his eyes. That can’t be possible, however, because he should only care enough to tell the king that I’m keeping a fox up here. If King Dolian finds out, he willkillBella. Another death will be on my hands, and I will be truly alone this time. When the tears well, I let them fall onto my cheeks, the fear of losing my last friend too much to fight off. I take a step in front of Bella, trying to partially hide her as I clutch onto the fur at her neck. The guard’s gaze drops down to what he can see of Bella, his brows drawing in slightly in concentration.
“My Lady, I meant no disrespect to you and I apologize. Your secret,” he says as he pointedly brings his eyes back to mine, “is safe with me.” With a nod, he steps back onto the landing and closes the door behind him. A chill runs through me as Bella nudges her nose against my leg. My cheeks puff with air before I blow it out, my hands shaky in front of me.
“I’ve never heard you make that noise before, Bells,” I whisper, kneeling down to look at her. Her golden eyes stare back while I wipe the tears from my face and then wrap my arms around her neck. I breathe her in for a moment before I stand and we walk side-by-side back up to the loft.
I snuggle under the covers of my bed, the large window to my right opened to let the night air in. Bella curls into me, her head resting on my thigh. My hand lazily moves back and forth over her soft fur until her breathing grows heavy and small snores fill the silence of the tower. Maybe the caring side of the guard wasn’t all an act and that means he won’t actually tell the king about Bella. At least, I have the hope that he won’t.
“The moon may have the stars, but at least I have you,” I whisper before laying my hand flat on her back and closing my eyes.
I awake the next morning to a familiar scraping noise at the door. When it stops, I get out of bed carefully—so as to not disturb Bella—and make my way down the stairs. The sun is just barely cresting over the horizon, the vibrant golden colors of the dawn sky just starting to peek past the midnight blues from the previous night. I retrieve the folded up paper laying on the floor.
MY LADY,
I KNOW THAT YOU DO NOT OWE ME THE CHANCE TO EXPLAIN, BUT I WOULD LIKE TO TRY TO DO SO ANYWAY. I’M SORRY FOR INSINUATING THAT I WAS MERELY VISITING YOU TO FEED SOME INNATE CURIOSITY OR TO BRING GOSSIP BACK TO THE GUARDS. THE TRUTH IS, SINCE THE MOMENT I SAW YOU (MORE APPROPRIATELY, SINCE THE MOMENT YOU STARTLED ME), I HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO STOP THINKING ABOUT YOU.
NOT BECAUSE YOU’RE HERE FOR MY ENTERTAINMENT OR ANYONE ELSE’S, BUT BECAUSE—AS I’VE MENTIONED BEFORE—YOU ARE NOTHING LIKE WHAT I EXPECTED, AND I’D BE LYING IF I SAID I WASN’T DYING TO KNOW MORE ABOUT YOU. SO, I OFFER A PROPOSITION: TOMORROW NIGHT I WOULD LIKE TO BRING YOU MY FAVORITE DESSERT FROM VITOUR. IF YOU ARE FEELING GENEROUS ENOUGH TO GIVE ME A SECOND CHANCE, PLACE A NOTE OUTSIDE YOUR DOOR AFTER THE SUN SETS TONIGHT.
PLEASE KNOW THAT I HOLD YOU TO NO OBLIGATION. MY APOLOGY STANDS NO MATTER WHAT YOU DECIDE.
SINCERELY,
FLYNN
Flynn. The guard’s name is Flynn. I reread the note an embarrassing number of times before folding it back up and walking to the couch to take a seat, laying the note down in my lap. Is it insane of me to actually think this guard is interested in getting to know me? Or am I falling prey to someone who will take advantage of me the first opportunity that he gets? Am I so hopelessly desperate for a friend that I’m willing to risk everything with a King’s Guardsman whose only known attribute is that he’s beenniceto me? My knees draw up on the couch as I hug them to my chest, indecision warring inside me. Then again, his knowledge as a guard could be invaluable to helping me escape. The blood oath prevents him from helping outright, but what if I can get information from him somehow? Maybe pretending to be his friend will be enough to get him to unknowingly help me or give me an opening to do it on my own.
I spend most of the day wondering about what I should do and if I should respond. When the sun starts to set in the sky, I grab a small pot of ink and a quill and set them on the tea table—sitting cross-legged on the floor next to it. I also grab extra paper, as it has been a while since I’ve written anything and I’m sure I need to practice. My first few attempts are sloppy at best, but eventually, my writing is neat enough to start. Just as the sun is crossing the horizon, with a candle lit next to me for extra light, I write my letter to Flynn.
Dear Flynn,
I accept your offering of treats as well as your apology. Also, I am not your Lady.
Cordially,
Rhea
