Page 78 of Heir Of Sun And Moon
“Don’t apologize.” His fingers tilt my chin up to meet his gaze again. Even with just the smallest hint of the growing morning light, the silver flecks in them sparkle. “Talk to me. Let me help you.”
A knot grows in my throat at those four words. I try to speak, try to work past the emotions trapped there, but I can’t form words. It’s like my body is so used to bottling everything up that it doesn’t know how to react when someone is begging me to let it all out. I look around the forest instead and remember that we’re supposed to be on the run. We don’t exactly have time for me to sift through everything here. And though I know Flynn would give me the space to do it, we’re risking our lives the longer we sit here. I’ve caused plenty of that already. So I close my eyes and take a steadying breath, clenching my free hand into a fist until that lump in my throat disappears.
“We can talk when we are farther away from the king,” I say finally, opening my eyes and giving him a small smile. He studies me, his too-observant gaze roaming my face, before he nods and then stands in one fluid motion, pulling me up with him. He hands me my boots, and I realize that he has cleaned out the one that was soaked in my blood. I quickly wash off the remnants of dried blood that is on my hands and feet before we brush our teeth, and I start asking Flynn questions about the previous night. “How long were we sleeping?”
He returns the toothbrushes and mint leaf paste before grabbing the two satchels and crisscrossing the straps as he places one on each shoulder. “I carried you for about three hours before I needed to stop and rest. So based on the sun now, I would guess that we’ve been in this spot for nearly the same amount of time.” He says it casually, as if carrying someone for that long is to be expected. Meanwhile, my jaw is practically unhinged as I stare at him. “What?”
“You carried me for three hours.” I confirm, shock drawing my eyebrows high on my forehead. “After pulling the arrows out? In the dark?”
“Yes,” he responds. His head moves up and down in a slow nod as Bella comes to stand at his side, nudging her head into his hip. He doesn’t break eye contact with me as he gently scratches her neck.
“How are you not more tired?” I blurt. He stretches his arms over his head, craning his neck side to side as he does so. His tunic rises with the movement, showing me just the smallest sliver of tanned skin over the black waistband of his trousers. I swallow and avert my gaze so that I’m not caught ogling him. Again.
“I’m used to not getting very much sleep,” he says before grabbing my hand and starting to walk.
What does that mean?Blinking, I notice that he has turned us in a direction thatisn’ttowards the rising sun. I tuck my mess of hair behind my ears, suddenly feeling more self-conscious as I ask, “Shouldn’t we be going east?” It’s half pulled back in a ponytail, half just a wild knot of tangles. Bella trots ahead of us, her steps quick and light as her ears flick side to side—listening for danger.
“If memory serves me correctly, we’ll have to follow this stream north a little bit more before it converges with the Vida River. Then we can follow that east pretty much the entire way,” he answers. “Let’s get as far as we can before the sun starts to set, and then we can wash up in the river and change.”
I nod my head, looking down at the mess of my clothes. They are torn and stained with dried blood, as well as covered with dirt. One of my boots still has drops of crimson on its side. I stare absent-mindedly at my foot as it comes into view every other step. Blood. And just like that, I’m back with Bella bleeding out onto the gray rug of the tower. My fear over losing her causing me to use magic for the first time that I didn’t even know was there. The memory shimmers in my mind like the rippling of a rock dropped into still water. Now, I’m kneeling in a pool of blood with Alexi’s head on my lap. His hand cups my face, his last breaths a declaration of love. The ripples move again, and it’s Flynn in the field near the wildflowers. His dull eyes pleading with me to run as blood leaks out around him.
So much blood has surrounded me that wasn’t my own, thatIwas a direct cause of. Well, I suppose Ihavefinally lost a good amount of my own as well, if my clothes and boots are any indication. I keep my gaze down at my feet, lost in thought but trying not to trip over anything, as we traverse the uneven ground of the woods. Each step farther from the tower is freeing in a way that I couldn’t have imagined, and yet… I don’t feel like I thought I would. Is it because we are being hunted? I knew that my uncle wouldn’t let me go without a fight, but so much happened during our escape that I wonder if it just exacerbated the vile feelings he has about me. If it just made him more desperate.
A short while later, Flynn points out where the small stream we are following joins the much larger Vida River. I have never seen a river in person before, and I marvel at how on the surface it looks so calm, so smooth. The blue waters contrast against the dark green and brown of the trees and fallen leaves surrounding it. But beneath the surface, the underwater grass and plants are bent from the force of the moving current. It is so unassuming, so deceptive. Is that what I am doing to Flynn? He has seen me cry, he has seen me after being abused by my uncle, and he has seen me use my secret magic. But he doesn’t know about the dark well of thoughts that reside in my mind. He isn’t aware of all of the locked away feelings that I still feel the pressure of every single day. He doesn’t know of the cold, ancientothernessthat is part of my magic. And what will happen when he finds out? He may call me “Sunshine,” but I often feel like the cold shadows the sun casts.
“Are you hungry?” he asks, the weight of his gaze heavy on the side of my face. I nod, feeling a bit lightheaded from my lack of food or the loss of blood or maybe from the use of my magic. I’m not sure. Was it only yesterday that everything had happened? Not even a full day has passed of me being out of the tower, and we have all nearly died, with the exception of Bella.
He leads us to a tree, the twisting limbs of which grow in every direction as they sprout from all over the trunk. Flynn passes me an apple and some nuts, placing a pile of freshly picked leaves on the ground to put some dried meat for Bella onto. She is famished though, eating her food quickly and giving Flynn what he calls “sad eyes” in order to get more food. Of course, he doesn’t object at all. When I voice my concern about running out of food for her, he just laughs. “She’s a wild animal,” he says and shrugs as he meets my gaze over his shoulder. “If she runs out of what we brought, then she can hunt for more food for herself.”
“She’s been in the tower with me for nearly five years. What if she doesn’t knowhowto anymore? She’s practically more mortal than fox now,” I point out. Bella’s head lifts from where she is eating, her golden eyes staring as she tilts her head. “No offense?” I add on. Bella huffs, but goes back to her food.
“I still can’t believe you trained her to use the toilet.” Flynn walks over to where I sit on one of the tree’s twisting branches, legs dangling underneath. He leans a shoulder against the thick trunk, folding his arms over his broad chest.
“I wish I could take credit for it,” I sigh, “but the truth is that I merely showed her where the toilet was and she figured it out herself.” Finishing the last of my food, I start to slide off of the limb, but Flynn steps in front of me, his large physique taking up my view. “Shouldn’t we head out?” I ask. Though I’m sitting a few feet above the ground, he is so tall that I still need to look up at him.
“You’ve been quiet and lost in your thoughts,” he says, the heat from his body radiating to me. My shoulders draw up to my ears on instinct as I prepare to wall up my defenses again. I can’t have this conversation right now. “And if I need to say this a hundred times, I will. I want to be here with you. I want to help you. All you have to do is let me.” His hand reaches out for mine, gently brushing his fingers against my skin.
I suck in a breath, somehow feeling both weightless and weighed down by his words. Speaking is beyond me at the moment, but I manage a nod.
He leans towards me a little more, his hand trailing up my arm slowly as he does. “There’s something I need to tell—” His voice cuts off as something catches his eye behind me. I watch as his gaze narrows, his brows drawing together in concentration. Bella moves as well, lifting her head up and focusing her gaze on the same place Flynn is. “We need to go. Now!”
He hauls me off the branch, carefully setting me down on the ground before quickly putting both of our bags on his shoulders with his sword sheathed down his back beneath them. Grabbing my hand, we start running along the edge of the river. I struggle to keep up with Flynn, my body still so exhausted. Bella runs just ahead of us, her pace a bit faster than ours.
“What did you see?” I ask, gasping for breath, but I don’t need Flynn to answer because I see it then too. Reflecting the light from a now fully risen sun are glints and gleams of golden armor. The King’s Guard isn’t only coming from behind us. A line of them is parallel to the river we are following. “Oh gods,” I whisper. The gold glitters far ahead within the trees. It’s an entire battalion, just for the three of us.
“We need to get in the river. They won’t jump in to follow us with all of their armor on.” He huffs, eyeing the water next to us. “There.” He points to a spot up ahead where the bank goes up a hill, the river many feet below it. The water is also less calm on the surface and more indicative of the strength of the current I saw earlier.
“Flynn, I can’t swim,” I state obviously. My eyes wide as we start to make our ascent. My legs protest fiercely at the climb—my entire body does.
“I won’t let go of your hand when we jump. Hold on to me as tight as you can,” he says in between heavy breaths. “And when we’re in the water, you’ll get on my back and wrap your legs around my waist. Okay?”
I nod because I’m so out of breath that I can’t do much else. The hill starts to level out, Flynn never breaking pace but practically dragging me behind him. I hear thezingin the air only a moment before an arrow lands in the ground at my side, narrowly missing my foot. A scream gets caught in my throat. We’re completely exposed out here, anactualmoving target, and judging by what happened yesterday, all they need is one small opportunity to land a shot on one of us, and our escape will be that much more difficult. Flynn can’t make another hike while carrying my dead weight—or maybe he can—but I definitely don’t want to have another arrow taken out of me.
“We’re going to jump on the count of three. Keep running, anddo not,” he emphasizes each word pointedly, “let go of my hand.” I hold his stare, seeing the determination there—and the fear.
“I won’t.”
“One.” Another arrow rushes by his head, way too close. My heart beats frantically, my hand squeezing his as tightly as I can. “Two,” he calls out, checking to make sure the straps of the satchels are tight around him so that they don’t get lost in the water. We’re a handful of steps from cresting the top of the hill, my feet aching each time they pound on the forest floor. There’s a ringing in my ears, my magic right under my skin like it’s going to burst through. “Three,” Flynn shouts, and we make an abrupt turn to leap off the highest point of the hill.
