Page 115 of Resistant

I am a ghost again. I eat, I drink. I walk through the woods. At night I thrash in my sleep and fantasize about revenge.

Declan begs me in the darkness to talk to him. I have nothing to say. Brynn died in Louisiana, and now Nathan is dead too. I’ve cried until there are no more tears.

I walk further and further from the cabin each day; this forest is almost as savage as my mind. I remember the day I jumped off the bridge to try and escape the agony of Knox. I contemplate. And I burn with anger at what the Reform did to my son.

The creatures here have no fear of me, and I trembled this afternoon when I stumbled on a black mama bear and her cubs. I was afraid of more pain, but realized I wasn’t afraid to die. I welcomed it. I long for the courage to die.

The mama bear roared her furry at me and I gradually backed away from her cubs. It’s what I would want for my own sons. It seemed to satisfy her. She nudged one with her nose to get moving in front of her and they all ambled away. I sat in that little clearing for hours, asking for death to come back for me. But he didn’t.

I’m back at the cabin now pretending to read a book while Declan finishes his work. I hear water running and flip another unread page.

Declan enters the cabin dripping wet with only a towel. I glance at him and find I’m unable to look away. His eyes burn into mine. He’s waiting for something, but it won’t come. Non-Brynn decides we should put him out of his misery.

“Declan, Brynn is dead.”

He flinches and I see determination flit across his face before he hides it. Pretty sure he’s going to push me. The minutes tick by and he doesn’t break his stare. I look down at his feet, a puddle forming on the floor.

“You should- ”

“Don’t.”

I look back at him, startled and feel the angry burn begin to creep up from my gut.

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t evade me, Brynn. It’s time baby girl. It’s time to find Brynn.”

That burn gets stuck in my throat and I choke on a sob.

“She’s gone indefinitely, Declan. You should leave me here. I’m an emotional train wreck that neither of us will survive.”

His head cocks to the side and he looks at me in disbelief. He steps out to the porch, I hear him muttering and banging around. I don’t have the energy to be curious.

“Princess, you need to be sure this is the road you want to take. Because I won’t let you take it alone.”

“I’m not going to heal from this, Declan. “I can’t beherfor you anymore. Knox-”

A deep rumble erupts from his chest. I gasp when his hand encircles my neck, applying pressure and he slams me against the wall. I wince and squeeze my thighs together and push on my toes attempting to increase my airflow. His grip tightens and I stare into his eyes, just inches from my face. He looks feral, and my body shakes in response to his glare.

“You want a fight baby girl, I’ll fight for you. You want a villain? Huh? That what you want Princess? A villain to burn the world down for you? Well, here I am.”

He grasps my wrists and I breathe deeply. I feel the floor move away from me and I’m slung by my wrists from the rafter that squeaks as I sway from my bonds. I kick out at him.

He laughs in my face, trailing a finger down my cheek.

“Let’s fight.”

I kick at him again, and he easily catches my ankle. I thrash at my bindings and they tighten, my hair sticks to my face and I can’t see.

I feel something cold prick at my skin, hear the ripping of fabric and my pants fall away from my hips. The cold scratchy sensation continues down my thigh.

“Don’t move Princess, or you’ll end up with a nice longpermanentreminder of who you belong to. I kick out anyway and hiss when I realize he’s cutting my clothes off. The cut stings.

I hear a rumble from Declan’s throat and watch fascinated as he licks the small well of blood from my thigh. My belly hitches, and I feel myself get wet.No time like the present to get more fucked in the head Brynn, Jesus.

His fingers snake under my panties and he feels the evidence of my arousal and laughs.

“Oh, Princess. You didn’t think that I’d allow you to drown in your own head alone, did you? You see, the one thing you fail to realize is that I’ve been right beside you the whole time, and I’m just as fucked as you are. You think it’s all unicorn shits and pretty glitter over here in my head knowing what he did with you? What he didtoyou? But I’ve already made up my mind I won’t let you go. So, either, we both dive into madness together, or we scrape our way to the surface and fix our shit. What is it baby girl?”

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