Page 6 of Facing the Pain

The day my military career came to an end started out the same. Nothing different, just another area to sweep and people to talk to. The day ended when our Humvee was attacked. I heard a bomb before I could react. My world faded to black.

I woke up. I didn’t know how many days later, but I did know I was in a hospital in Germany and my dad and Quinton were sitting on each side of me. The only thought going through my head wasI’m glad I woke up. These two strong bikers looked out of place.

My dad was the first to realize my eyes were open and then a nurse walked in. My dad couldn’t understand her because she was speaking German. I answered the nurse. German was one of the first languages I learned in my training. My dad and brother both looked at me like I was crazy and a gift from God at the same time.

“It’s alright. She asked if I was thirsty and then said she was getting the doctor and something for me to drink.” I half laughed but that hurt. “How are the others? There were four of us—Snide, Peters, Long and me.” I looked at Quinton and he had a sadness in his eyes. I looked at Dad.

“What do you remember?” Dad asked.

“We were attacked by rebels and then there was an explosion. After that, things went black. There were four others behind us in another Humvee.” I couldn’t find any more memories from that day. Was it that day? Just how much time had passed?

“You’ve been here five days and we’ve been here for three. Long had a leg amputated. Peters has had two surgeries attempting to remove all the shrapnel. They’re giving him a little time to regain some strength. He’s got one piece next to his spine and they’re waiting for the surgeon to arrive to get it out. Snide took the brunt of the shrapnel from the explosion. The Humvee had a pipe bomb underneath the driver’s seat, and it was detonated when you were attacked by the rebels. It was a setup. Snide was the driver and Peters was sitting behind him. Long’s legs were removed because they were burned so badly. You have a severe concussion and a dislocated shoulder. You were shot twice, and they had to take a metal sliver out of the back of your head. Another few inches and you would be dead. It’s time for you to come home, Charlie,” my dad told me. I only had a few weeks left, and I knew by the time all this healed, it would be time.

“Alright, I’m ready. My time is almost up. I miss home.” I just didn’t know I wouldn’t have a choice in the matter. I was released on a medical discharge, but I missed Snide’s funeral.

I was there for Peter’s. He couldn’t take being paralyzed from the waist down, so he took his own life. Long did the same thing a year later. He said his life was useless without both his legs. I died a little more with each loss.

Chapter Seven

CHARLIE

Life Went On

Iwent through some depression, but I picked myself up and went on. It’s what a soldier does. I turned twenty-one a few weeks after Long’s death and I spiraled hard.

My vision into the future stopped at going into the Army. Check—done that. Now to the next thing. I found my way the second week I was home and had come home drunk off my ass with Rance. My dad found out and the next morning my dad announced that no daughter of his was going to become a club slut. I mean, really? I’d come home with my virtue intact and with my brother.

I knew building my home was my next big venture. I set up an appointment with an architect to look at some plans and let him know what I was looking for. I knew this would be a work in progress for a while. I was a grown woman, and it was time I was adulting all the time.

I don’t know how it happened, but Duke asked me out for a date, and at the time, he seemed like a good man. I mean, bikers don’t date, but if he could bend for me, then I could tolerate a date. The thing was that Duke was sweet when he stopped being such a big flirt. He opened doors for me and asked what my preferences were. I had a very enjoyable time, and he wasn’t handsy. The things I heard of Duke was he was a lady’s man, and he wasn’t choosey of which lady. With me, he was different, or he made it seem that way.

We compromised that we would see each other but not at the clubhouse. My dad approved with reservations and Quinton was the only brother of mine that disapproved. He wouldn’t say why. I thought he and Duke were tight. The only thing Quinton would say was to keep my eyes open. I assured him I would. The longer that Duke and I spent together, the more infatuated I became. Duke told me in time that he loved me and wanted to make me his ol’ lady. I knew what an honor that was in the club. I knew what I felt wasn’t anything close to what I felt for Jake, but then I thought maybe we only get that one great love in our life. One soulmate and the rest were just love. I didn’t even know if love was what I was feeling.

I agreed to be Duke’s ol’ lady, but I told him everything that I was feeling. I would never deceive someone that way. I told Quinton and talked to him about it too. He told me to follow my heart but to not do it with my eyes closed. Club life was club life and there were always hidden agendas—another weird remark.

That was the night that Duke and I first made love. Duke was sweet and took care of me. I felt like a precious doll. I didn’t know if I would ever feel that safe and loved again. If I had only listened to Quinton closer.

It was our big night a little over a month later. Duke had been acting differently, and it was like my family suddenly despised him. I knew there was talk around the clubhouse about trouble that was happening in Duke’s family—something about an older brother that had been disowned years ago. I didn’t see how that could have anything to do with my family but in the MC life you just never knew. Duke was as tight lipped about it as my dad and brothers. I was glad tonight was going to be over and by this time tomorrow, I would be a claimed woman and things would get back to normal.

I knew I shouldn’t be acting this way, but this morning I found out I was pregnant. After this event settled, I would need to bring that up. I had been going for follow-up x-rays and blood tests to make sure I was healing correctly. They did a pregnancy test before the x-ray and it was positive. I was shocked, but I shouldn’t have been. I had never been on birth control except when I was in the military and I quit when I got out. I was told going into a combat zone that it was against the rules to be sexually active. I understood that but being caught behind enemy lines didn’t mean I wouldn’t be attacked by an enemy. I didn’t know if the enemy would understand and follow an order given by the American government. My thoughts were that if I were ever attacked by an enemy, I might be able to find my way back from a rape, but I wouldn’t go home to my family carrying the child of a rapist. I had an implant put in my arm. The side effects that I had from them were not something I liked. I had it removed as soon as I was home. I just hadn’t thought. I would face the consequences; we could face it. Duke was always telling me what a big family he wanted, and I wasn’t against starting our family now.

I put on my biker princess best and decided to head over to the clubhouse to see if I could help with something. I walked through the field between our house and the clubhouse. I hadn’t taken that walk for a while. I missed it. I went in the back way, walking through the garage to get to the back door of the kitchen. No one could see me, and I was being quiet. A conversation my dad was having with my brothers stopped me. I stooped down and finished listening so I couldn’t be found eavesdropping.

“Dad, we need to tell Charlie. If not, she’s going into a relationship without knowing everything. Once that tattoo is in place, the only way she can be released is when Duke is ready to let her go. You know he was on a mission to get Charlie so it would strengthen the ties between his dad’s club and ours. It’s what the mother chapter wants, and that’s why this is happening. Jules wants both territories under his rule, and he thinks he has his way to do that if our families are brought together. Then all he would need to do is get rid of you before you step down. It doesn’t matter who you would leave the presidency to in our club. There’s been too many accidents and brothers hurt in other clubs for all this to be a coincidence. I say Jules and Duke have something to do with it. Duke will hurt Charlie. The club has always been our lives, but Charlie is our blood. We need to do something to stop this.” Tobie was livid.

“The vote was taken that no brother would interfere. Whoever gives Charlie any information is out of the club. No exceptions. That came from the mother club. I have no say in it. The mother chapter wants this union. Are you ready to walk away from the club? We could do that, all of us, but they still get what they want—our club. If we let this play out, we may find a way to intercede along the way. We are here, and no one can hurt Charlie this way. She’s protected by each of us.” Dad wasn’t happy about this at all.

“The mother club didn’t say we couldn’t fuck Duke up every damn day,” Rance yelled. Dad quieted him. I knew how the club worked. The mother club kept their noses out of each club’s business if they pay their dues unless it was something important. They thought this would strengthen the club. I saw the advantages of having close ties between different chapters. That would leave Duke the head of one of the clubs and that was a power play. Duke and his dad, Jules, have had an eye on Dad’s club, because Dad has made it prosper. But if Dad or my brothers do anything to tip me off, then they were canned. Not on my watch. Dad’s club made twice the money of any of the other chapters of the club but the mother chapter. He also takes on more responsibility of the jobs that trickle down from the mother chapter, so he is respected more. He’s worked too hard to get this club where it needs to be. I needed to find Quinton.

I found Quinton in his room and I took him back out the back door and back down my trail before anyone was able see us. I brought Quinton to the small pond on the path. I knew this was out of surveillance camera’s view.

“Quit beating around the bush and tell me. I overheard the things that Duke and Jules have put in motion. It’s a power play to take our family out of the president’s role in the club for this charter. I also know anyone that interferes with our relationship gets to kick rocks. This conversation is between us and it goes no further. I will take it to my grave.” I tried to convince Quinton to tell me.

“Duke didn’t argue with you not coming to the club with him because he has a club girl set up in his room. He’s arrogant about it and has been rubbing it in Dad’s nose. There’s not a damn thing Dad can do about it. There’s a rumor that Sheila is knocked up. That’s a rumor between the girls but it’s spreading around the club. Everyone in the club knows what Duke is up to, but we have been bound not to say a damn thing. Duke is a prospect here, but he was ready to get his patch at his dad’s club. The word has come down that the mother club wants him patched in here. Who would extend their prospect days? It didn’t make sense to us. When our president of the mother chapter was taken out last year, they put one of the Lake brothers in that position. It was voted on so it is legal within our bylaws, but it was done so fast that no one could really react to all of it. The man that took out the old president was never found and it’s rumored to be an inside job, but every time we are close to finding the man, he is tipped off. We have a mole or more than one somewhere in our club. We don’t think it’s in our chapter but now the search has been on hold for a while. It’s like they don’t want to find the man. We have started our own investigation on the down low and if we are found out, then we will be answering to the mother chapter.” Quinton pauses and then looks at me and smiles. “Damn, I’m glad you’re still nosy.” Quinton hugged me tight. I sat and began to think. The claiming was that night. I was out of time. I looked at my watch. This is all a lot to take in. There’s only one way to help my family now or the only way I can figure out. I need to stall and give my family more time to do their digging while the club is busy somewhere else.

“When was the last time Jake’s truck was serviced and is it filled up with gas?” I questioned my brother.

“Last week and yes, it’s full of gas and has new tires. Why?” Quinton asked.

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