Page 45 of Kept

I told him I wouldn’t leave without one of them.

Pursing my lips, I hover on the edge and debate the options. The ground is right there. My toes could be sinking into the cool grass right now.

Instead, the breeze is blowing directly against my ass, making me shiver. Swallowing down the nagging sense of disloyalty, I start to gingerly make my way down, testing the weight of the wooden slats to make sure they’ll take my weight.

He probably meant away from the house. He wouldn’t mean the gardens. There’s nobody around, that’s clear from the lack of lights.

He won’t even know.

The anxiety dancing in my stomach ratchets up as I climb down, and by the time I pause, hovering just above the ground, I’m drowning in guilt. Pressing my face into the back of my hands where they grip the wood, I take a deep breath.

I’m reading way too much into this. He’s not going to care.

My stomach doesn’t agree with me, but I swallow the unease down. I only get to experience this moment once, and I want to make the most of it.

Softly, I press my toe into the ground. It feels cool beneath my toes, a little damp, and my breath catches as I scrunch up my toes, digging them into the moist earth.

The smile spreads across my face until I’m grinning, and I set my other foot down, savoring the feel of the ground sinking slightly beneath my feet.

“Freedom,” I whisper, tasting the word on my tongue. As I stare out into the dark, a delighted laugh erupts from my throat.

A moment later, I’m sprawled on the ground. Little sticks and stones dig into my stomach, my legs, but I don’t care. Pressing my cheek into the ground, I take great, gasping breaths, breathing in the earthy fragrance.

My heart is singing.

“I’m so glad I left,” I whisper. My confession fades away into the dark.

No matter what. Even if I went back tomorrow, I will never, ever forget this moment, not if I lived in that place for another twenty-three years.

I don’t care how angry Ethan is right now. This is all I wanted, and I’m going to make the most of it.

My hair trails along the ground as I climb to my feet, twisting my feet to feel every piece of dirt as I start to move.

I have no idea where I’m going. My pace picks up slowly until I’m almost running, and my hair flies out behind me as I run as fast as I can, laughing breathlessly at the sensation. I need to go back, but five minutes won’t hurt.

Just five more minutes.

18 - Ryder

Maverickislurkinginhis study when I pop my head around the door, his usual position. The screen of his laptop lights up his face in the dark room, and I bend down to flick on a lamp.

“That will never not be creepy,” I tell him when he looks up, his face ghostly against the bright light. “Do you have to sit in the dark like that?”

Maverick sighs. “What do you want, Ryder?”

Shrugging, I move over to stare at the wall. Notes, photographs, maps are scattered everywhere. A face looks out at me, bright curls surrounding a laughing face. The baby in the woman’s arms waves chubby fists. The photo is old now, curling around the edges, but he’s never taken it down.

To Maverick, it’s evidence of his failure. Every case we have, he pushes harder.

Turning away from the image, I survey him. For once, he won’t meet my eye, staring stubbornly at his screen with his jaw set.

“Mav,” I ask him outright. “What was that?”

I don’t know what I expected from dinner, but it sure as fuck wasn’t Maverick going full-blown caveman on us. Enzo, I would have expected. But our esteemed leader-slash father figure - even though he hates it - is very clearly enamored with our new guest.

He ignores me, but I push his screen down with a click, and he mutters a curse. “Leave it alone, Ry.”

“Nope.” I pop the ‘p’. “Don’t think I will. Youlikeher.”