Page 28 of Scandal

I debate for a long time, whether it’s right or wrong to know. Whether there is anything I can do. How helpless I am.

Fuck it.

Action is needed. I have to know.

Creeping down to the base of the stairs, my ears strain for sounds, but it’s dark and silent at the top. I continue down to the study and let myself through the glass door.

I lift the laptop lid. The screen lights up, greeting me with an image of me and dad at pride two years ago. Dad in his “Free Dad hugs” T-shirt. Me in a generic rainbow flag tee.

Swallow down the guilt of breaking and entering. I have to know what he’s done.

His password is exactly what I expect. Same as all our shared family accounts. My first name and our address from before we moved. Easily guessable.

When the computer loads, I can see two windows are still open. The first is the student records. It’s open at Xander’s file. There are five documents attached. Documents I have no doubt describe in detail what he’s done that’s so egregious. I could read them right now. Get the school’s take on the story. But if I didn’t want to hear Xan’s stories before, I really don’t want to hear the school’s take.

Next, I open the email window and head to the sent folder. There’s a message to Dean Runkin.

Dear Dean Runkin,

Based on my review of the conduct contract signed by Mr. Briggs in April, I believe the September assault on Mr. Browning qualifies as an unacceptable behavior described herein. As consequence for breaking his contract, I expect his immediate removal from student housing. It is our responsibility to ensure the safety of all students.

Regards,

President Parker

With shaky fingers, I select message options and recall the message. Not that will stop him from following up on the matter. But it’s something.

Traitor.I think as I close the lid to the computer and push myself back from his desk. How can my dad be such a traitor? He didn’t even listen to one thing I said. He just saw red and acted.

To protect me? It doesn’t feel like it. Not if he had been listening. Not if he bothered to hear what I was saying, that this would hurt me too. That I wanted to find a way to make it work with Xan, not have him torn away from me.

The most fucked-up thing about it is that the whole time, Xan warned me that being friends with him would hurt me. But look how wrong he was. I’m the one that hurt him. This is all my fault. I‘m getting him kicked out of the dorms. All for saving me. I have to go to him. Warn him. Beg for him to forgive me. I need to see Xan right now.

Xander

My heart gallops as my ears register the sound of my dorm room door opening. I blink into the darkness. My body is still frozen from GABA neurotransmitters, so I can’t move. And that’s fucked, because I’m already recognizing the small form in the doorway. Can already smell the grapefruit boy walking toward me. I’m tangled in his comforter like a snake.

Fucking great. I’m in his damn bed.

Finally, I shake off the GABA and sit up. There’s an uneasy stillness in the air.

“Uh. Hey,” I croak.

“Hey,” he says softly. I try to read his tone, but I’m not sure what’s there. My brain is too foggy. Too fucked.

Then I get this happy feeling. Relief sweeps through me. Cam is okay. I think. Maybe. His face is puffy, I can see it even in the pale light of the moon. It has me jumping upright. “What happened? Tell me you’re okay.”

“You care about me. Don’t you?” he asks, like he’s confirming a suspicion.

I’m too gripped to lie. “Yes. I do.”

His shoulder relax and he steps closer. “It’s all my fault.” His words are choked.

God, just to be in his presence again... I hate myself for pushing him away. I should have listened to my gut. Taken the shot while I had the chance. Joy doesn’t always know best. Nayla sure as hell doesn’t.

“I was jealous, earlier. Seeing you with that guy. I’m sorry,” I blurt out.

Cam’s eyes widen and he takes a step back, his hand reaching for support from the desk. His lips part slightly, as if he’s unsure what to say.

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