Page 136 of The Hallows Queen

“Okay. Thanks.” I roll my eyes and sigh as I turn and head for the door, and he chases after me.

“Penelope, wait.” He grabs my arm, and I turn to look at him. “Can you stay and talk? Can we have lunch? You left the other day before I woke up, and I have so much I still need to say to you.”

Scanning my eyes over him, I admire his perfect face, his thick arms and wide chest, and I hate how much I like what I see. I want to hate himso fucking bad,but I think there’s always going to be that part of me that reacts like this when he’s near.

“It isn’t a good idea,” I say, meeting his gaze.

“Why not?” His fingers slide down my arm to my hand, and he threads his fingers through mine.

I squeeze his hand, unable to stop myself. “Because I don’t trust myself around you. I don’t like the way you make me feel.”

His brows pull down, and I feel like with two simple sentences, I’ve ripped myself wide open and shown him everything that’s inside. I feel raw and exposed, and I want to close up like a dying flower under his gaze.

“What do I make you feel?”

I shake my head, pulling my hand from his. “Crazy.”

He presses his lips together in thought, then steps toward me. “You got into bed with me the other night… Why?”

“I don’t know,” I whisper, my heart racing under my ribs.

He tucks my hair behind my ear. “Come in and sit down, we can order room service. I promise I’ll behave.”

“Okay,” I answer without thinking, nodding, and my stomach fills with nerves.

He smiles, holding out a hand for me to grab. When I slip my palm in his, he runs his thumb over my knuckles. And as soon as he freezes, I know the error I’ve made.

“You aren’t wearing a ring.” He looks at me, his eyes wide.

Pulling my hand back, I clear my throat. “I ended things with Gavin.”

“Because of me?” he asks, his lips twitching.

I shake my head, taking a breath. “No, Hayden, because ofme.Now, if you want me to stay for lunch, let’s stop talking about this.”

He nods, and I don’t miss the little smile that touches his lips as he turns to lead me farther inside the suite. Somehow, I came over here to yell at him and give him hell, and I ended up showing every card in my hand. I shouldn’t be surprised, though. If there’s anything he’s always been good at, it’s stripping down my walls.

* * *

Hayden and I order lunch,then sit out on the balcony to stare at the beach and listen to the rain as we eat in silence. When our plates are empty, I curl my feet under myself and get comfortable in the seat.

“Tell me something good.” I swirl my finger around the top of my water bottle, looking out at the ocean.

He’s silent for a moment, then he takes a breath. “The summer between my sophomore and junior years of college, I went to Zambia with this volunteer group that works with UCLA. I needed the volunteer hours to graduate and getting out of the country to get some distance seemed like a good idea at the time for my recovery. I worked mostly with a group of students who helped elementary-aged kids – tutoring, sports, arts and just giving them someone to lean on, I guess. There was this one day, we took all the kids out on this safari type tour. We were on this bus with no windows or doors, just giant holes in the side of the metal.” He laughs, shaking his head in thought, and the sound warms me.

“The driver wasconfident.” He laughs again. “Easily reaching 40 miles per hour through the damn park. No real road, just tracks in the grass to tell them where to go, and all the kids were having the time of their lives, laughing, looking at the animals, joking with each other. Well, the volunteers were in the seats in the back, the ones without seatbelts, because this bus was probably older than me. So I’m grabbing onto the back of the seat in front of me for dear life, trying not to fly out the side of the bus, trying to stay focused on the kids and the wild animals all around us, and the driver hits a bump in the road.”

He laughs again, waving his hands as he talks for added dramatic effect. “And Iflyout of the side of the bus, landing in the grass and breaking my arm.”

“Oh my god,” I gasp, laughing.

“And the driver doesn’t notice until he’s far enough away that I’m convinced I’m going to be trapped out in the fucking wild for the rest of my life. I’m sitting in the grass, holding my broken arm, shouting for them to turn around and come get me.” Laughing harder, he looks at me. “And I turn to my left, and there’s just a fucking zebra sitting there, staring at me.”

I laugh harder, imagining the Hayden I know out in the wild. “You’re kidding.”

“Not even a little. And listen, I was a business major, so I don’t know anything about wild animals, only the bare minimum they taught us before we got there for safety, so I don’t know if this zebra is looking at me like I’m on the menu for lunch. I’mfullon panicking, holding my broken arm, scared for my life, afraid to keep shouting just in case some other animals pop out and decide to take a bite of me.”

“Zebras are herbivores.” I laugh, shaking my head in disbelief. “Did you learn nothing in school?”

---