Page 68 of Dev Girl

Adam set his phone down again and jabbed the now-dark screen. “Apparently, yes. And worst case scenario? If they don’t, fuck those guys, and we’re not any worse off than we were before.”

“Where are we going to do this?” This was the best kind of distraction.

“Will Onyx let us use his back room?”

Sigh. My enthusiasm evaporated. “Probably, but not for long.” The words stuck in my throat. “He’s leaving. Like, out of state.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know.” Rather, I knew what Onyx told me, and I got it, but I didn’t want to talk about it.

“Oh. Bummer. We should do another show anyway.”

I agreed.

We made the loosest version ever of a plan, and Adam took off, leaving me to think about Onyx and Alys again.

About how Alys’s go-to excuse for not seeing us had rapidly become I’m busy with this project with Xander. It’s such a great opportunity. How Onyx had switched to I need to put more energy into packing the things I’m not selling with the store.

Good for both of them, but…

Sigh.

I grabbed the rest of my coffee to head out. As I was leaving, my feet stalled at the sight of my dad walking in.

“Maddox.” He gave me a curt nod.

Wonderful. “Hi, Dad.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

Was he fucking kidding? The question bristled over me like a scrub brush. “I’m between projects right now.”

“Ah.” Dad’s tone was flat.

Fuck this. “I’m going to get back to being a bum.” I brushed past him. As the door swung shut between us, I swore I heard him say wait, but when I looked over my shoulder, he was walking toward the front counter.

The fact that I had a job I loved, that didn’t work me to the bone, did not make me a bad person. I was torn between chasing him down to tell him that, and the reminder that I shouldn’t care what he thought. My old man had never had a good opinion of what I did with my time.

Talking to Onyx about kites two nights ago had brought back memories I thought I’d lost. Not so much full scenes as snippets, and they played in my head now as I crossed the street to his shop.

I would wonder if the colorful images in my head were real, but they were backed up by photos I’d seen in albums stuffed away at my Aunt Rosie’s place. Photos of Dad having fun with me when I was little. Of flying the kites Mom made.

I’d been so young, the images in my head were more color and emotion than shape, but in the pictures, Dad was smiling. Holding up one of Mom’s latest creations while she took photos of him and me. She was in a couple of the shots too, so I assumed Xander had been there behind her camera.

The past mingled with the present, gripping me hard. When we lost Mom, it was almost like losing Dad too.

And now Onyx was leaving. Alys was pulling away. Not that they were Dad and Mom, but they were people I loved.

Loved. The word hit me as hard as the loss did. I couldn’t let go of the family I’d built for myself. I wouldn’t.

21

Onyx

It’d been less than two full days since I’d seen Alys. As I headed to Gage’s to meet her and Maddox, my body hummed with the kind of anticipation usually reserved for a kid on Christmas morning. How was I going to survive not seeing her for months at a time?

Once she was talking to me again, more than just single word text answers, I’d feel better. I wasn’t missing Maddox.