Page 41 of Fierce

Something in his voice made me look at him more sharply. “Oh?”

He waved a hand. “Never mind. Your mum didn’t, eh. Your mum stayed. But all the same, she’s not here.”

“No. She died. That’s the sad story part. The rest of that’s just normal life, and I know it. Hardly worth talking about, so why did I? Blame the wine. But my mom—it turned out that there was a reason she had to rest so much, that she stopped eating. She had colon cancer, and she went pretty fast.”

I had to shut my eyes a moment at that. Because, yes, that was the hard part. The very worst thing to remember. Those last days in the hospice, my mother’s skin nearly transparent, stretched so tightly over her cheekbones, her hand gripping mine so tightly.

“Take care of your sister,” she’d said on that last day, her voice a rasp. “Please, baby. Please don’t let them take her away.”

“No.” The tears had threatened to rise and choke me, but I hadn’t let them. My mother had needed to see me strong, had needed to believe I could do it, that I would do it. She’d deserved to die in peace. “I won’t let them take her.”

“Promise me,” she’d said again.

I’d sketched the X over my chest with my free hand. “I cross my heart. I’ll take care of her. Always.”

She’d smiled, and I’d seen what it cost her. “And it’s such a good heart, baby. You’re such a good girl.”

I’d laid my cheek against her papery one, and then I had cried, because nothing in the world could have stopped me.

“Say goodbye, baby,” she’d whispered.

“Goodbye, Mom.”

The words had barely been more than a breath, but she’d heard. Her other hand, the one with the tubes taped to it, had come up and stroked my hair, and finally, I’d sobbed. And for the last time, my mother had held me while I cried.

I didn’t tell Hemi all that, though. I didn’t tell him any of that.

“So she died, and you were left with Karen,” he said. “When you were, what?”

“Nineteen. Five years ago. And you know what?” I smiled, tried to lighten it up. “You aren’t even the first guy to take me out with my sister. Because no choice, you know? A movie ticket’s cheaper than a babysitter. But none of them went out with me a second time. You think Karen was snarky today? Believe me, she can be so much worse.”

“Good thing I’ve got a bit of persistence,” Hemi said, with that slight softening around his eyes, his version of a smile, warming his normally stern expression. “Not so easily scared off, am I.”

“Not easily at all, I’d say. Considering that you’re still here.” I looked into those dark, liquid eyes, at the warmth in them, and something seemed to…connect. I could almost hear the ping as it happened.

“So,” he said, “want to come over here and sit with me for a moment?”

I went for one last feeble attempt at self-control. “You going to go for it, now that my little sister’s out of the picture?”

“You never know. I may lunge at you and…what was that? Oh, yeh. Stick my tongue down your throat and grope you. Or I may pour you a bit more wine and see if I can get you to curl up against me. I’d like to know that you were able to let go of everything for a little while today, because you were with me.”

And after that, how could I do anything else?

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