Page 48 of Carnage

“I bled.” Did my father not tell her this? I figured he would. The way they both look at me, they seem surprised I’m even here. So maybe my father hadn’t said anything, and she thought he left me on the streets.

“That’s—”

“Good.” My mother’s therapist interrupts whatever my mother was about to say. “Congratulations, Ashtyn, you’re officially a woman now.”

“Does that mean I no longer have to attend these sessions?” I ask. What do you know, I wasn’t a sex addict. I will be now, though.

“I think—”

“I’d like to continue seeing you.” She interrupts my mother once more. “Once a week should be enough.” Averting her eyes, she looks down at her pen and paper and writes in her notebook.

I refrain from sighing. “Why?” I ask.

She frowns, looking up at me. “I think it’s best that we save that for our next session.” Her eyes go from mine to my mother’s briefly, and I wonder if I’m going to start seeing her on my own? My mother won’t like that at all. She’s too nosy to let me come by myself. But if I start coming alone, does that mean she can’t tell my mother what we discuss? I’ll ask her that next time.

I remain silent throughout the rest of my mother’s session, tuning them out. I have nothing else to say and unlike my mother, I don’t care what her issues are that she needs to discuss with a therapist. I’d rather not know so my father can’t question me what is said between them. Not like he’d ask anyway. Pretty sure he doesn’t give a shit about my mother.

We’re riding the elevator down after her session when her cell rings. I catch sight of an unknown number before she can decline it. “You can get that if you need to,” I inform her.

Ignoring me, she shoves her cell into her Louis Vuitton and straightens her shoulders. She’s mad. I’m pretty sure it’s at me. I’m not sure what I can and can’t do anymore to make her happy.

Once outside, I walk toward my car not even bothering to tell her goodbye when she grabs my arm and turns me to face her. She’s got her sunglasses on, shielding her eyes from me. “Remember what I said, Ash.”

“About what?” I need her to explain what she means exactly.

“About Saint…” It’s the first time she’s referenced him, and it makes me wonder which Spade brother she would have chosen for me to be with. “A Lord in general.”

I nod.Ahh,“He’ll never love me. I remember.” When I turn back to my car, she spins me around again. “Mom,” I snap, yanking my arm free.

“I—” Her cell rings again, and she huffs. Digging it out of her purse, I see unknown on her screen. And as she takes a second to decline it once more, I jump into my car and speed off. I’m supposed to meet Saint back at Carnage, and I’m already late.

SAINT

I sit in my parents’home theater room. The lights are off, andTitanicplays on the screen before me. I’m relaxed back on one of the large couches. My back is propped up on pillows with one arm behind my head. The other absentmindedly rubs Ashtyn’s thigh over the Hermes blanket she’s wrapped up in.

We had planned on going swimming earlier, but the storm hit, so she suggested watchingTitanic. It’s her favorite movie of all time. I don’t hate it, but I’ve watched it more times than I care to.

My cell lights up next to me, and I pick it up to see it’s a text from Haidyn.

I’m at your parents'. Where the fuck are you?

I type back my reply.

In the media room.

The one place I didn’t look. Be right there.

My eyes fall to her, and I slowly pull the blanket back to see she’s still dressed in her swimsuit from earlier. We’ve been in here maybe thirty minutes, and she was out almost immediately. We didn’t get any sleep last night. Well, I didn’t. I kept her up for most of it. She passed out a couple of times, but I didn’t allow her to stay asleep.

Being told for three years that you can’t fuck and then getting the one thing you’ve always wanted means I’ll use her every chance I get. Any way that I can. I’ll sleep when I die. She’s been mine for two weeks now, and I still can’t get enough of her.

I type out a quick message to Haidyn.

Will you stop by my room and grab a few things?

Sure. What do you need?

I respond and place my phone back down next to me. Feeling something dig into the side of my leg, I reach down and see it’s the sucker she brought in here with her. Mine is next to my cell. Both still wrapped and untouched. So are the peach rings that she loves.

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