Page 26 of Carnage

“Surprise me.” I give him a smile.

“Hey, isn’t that your brother?” Marie taps my arm, pointing over to a group of guys.

He has his back turned to us, but it’s definitely him talking to a couple of guys. One I know better than the other. Tyson Crawford is a sophomore at Barrington this year. I’ve seen him hanging out with Saint at the house of Lords when I attended parties last year. The other guy is a senior. I only know him as Hooke. I’m not sure if that’s a last name or a nickname. But he’s a senior with the Spade brothers. “Grab my drink. I’ll be right back,” I tell her and don’t wait for a response.

I make my way over to them and interrupt their conversation. “Hey?” I say, yanking on Adam’s arm.

He turns around, looks down at me, and sighs, annoyed that I’m here. We’ve never been those twins you hear about who are so in tune that we can tell what the other feels or hear each other’s thoughts.

We don’t hang out very often. Even less so in the past few years. His life has always been devoted to the Lords, even before he started initiations. Then he had to move into the house of Lords our freshman year. No one in our family spends time with each other, though.

“What are you doing here, Ashtyn?” he asks, looking around over my head.

Hooke and Tyson stare blankly at me, and I avoid eye contact. Being around any Lord can be intimidating. They always make you feel small. Nonexistent. Especially the ones I’m not around normally. Makes me nervous. “I overheard you and Dad arguing back at the house,” I say, ignoring his question. I don’t have to tell him why I’m here. I’m an adult, and he doesn’t own this land.

Hooke and Tyson dismiss me and carry on with their previous conversation, and my brother runs his hand down his face. “Always being a snoop.”

“What was it about?” I place my hands on my hips.

He looks down at me, his green eyes narrowed with annoyance. “That’s none of your damn business.” Adam goes to walk off, but I follow him.

“Is it regarding the Lords?” I dig. They never tell me anything. Just enough to keep me guessing. I wonder if that’s what he was talking about with Tyson and Hooke. I should have listened before I interrupted.

“Fuck off, Ash,” he growls over his shoulder.

I place my hand on his arm. “Tell me—”

“Get the fuck away!” He spins around and shouts. Everyone who heard stops their conversations to stare at us.

“Are you…are you in trouble?” I ask softly. The Lords have no problem eliminating you if they feel that they can’t control you. He doesn’t meet my stare. Instead, he looks over my head, jaw clenching. “Can Dad help you?” I go on at his silence.

He gives a rough laugh. “No, Dad can’t help me.” His eyes drop to mine. “Just like he can’t make you a virgin again.”

My mouth falls open on a gasp, and his laughter grows. “What? Like it’s a secret that you’re a whore.”

“I am not,” I say defensively, and I wonder if Saint already told him what I did earlier in my bedroom at our parents’ house. I’m not dumb. I know guys brag when they fuck a girl. And although we didn’t fuck, I did act like a fool and ride his thigh. I was exactly what Saint wanted me to be—his needy fucking whore.

“Whatever.” He pulls his cell out of his pocket and types away on it. I stand staring at the grass until he puts it away. “You worry about your problem, and I’ll worry about mine.” With that, he turns and gives me his back, storming off into the crowd.

“Here you go.” Marie comes up beside me and hands me my drink. I take a big gulp, trying to ignore the pit in my stomach. I know I’m a virgin, but that still might not be enough when it comes time for the vow ceremony. I don’t know what I’m more afraid of—the punishment I’ll receive or the fact that Saint will have to throw me away.

NINE

SAINT

I’ve been watching her for the past hour. Adam texted me that she was here at the party. His exact words were:

Your whore is here. Get her off my back.

Adam doesn’t give a fuck that Ashtyn is to be my chosen. When I told him that I was picking her, he didn’t even bat an eye. He knew a Spade brother would have her one day. And my day is coming soon.

I hit call on my phone for the tenth time and watch her press ignore while grabbing a new drink. I’ve seen her down three so far. At this point, she’s pretty far gone.

I’ve stood back and watched her drink with her friend while they laugh and stumble over their own feet. It’s cute really. That she thinks she can ride my thigh, and come on it, and then ignore me like it never happened.

She’ll never be able to escape me. Not anymore. As much as I’ve wanted her, I’ve never let her know. Now I’m going to make sure she understands just how serious I am.

I send her a text.