Page 65 of Lust

Candice.

Out of all the individuals Noémi could have selected, she opted for the one person I despise the most. I guess that's why she's done it. This was never meant to be fun or fair. It’s a trial, not a party.

Where are the rabid hell hounds when you need them?

Truthfully, this is preferable to having the hellish beasts chasing me, but only slightly. It feels very strange to be looking at my biggest enemy, and yet somehow, even with all her features perfectly the same, I'm still managing to look like myself. I squint my eyes a bit and practice a grimace to get the correct level of contempt on my face before I'm happy with the results.

If I'm Candice, does that mean Candice is me?

It's only now I realize just how manipulative this round is. Sure, as Candice, I can say anything I like, but there's no doubt in my mind that Remy will be coming in here at some point and I’m guessing that swings both ways. Candice can and will put words into my mouth.

The thought of how to handle this is still going through my mind as the door opens. I was expecting Remy or Dade, but I'm not surprised when Felix Barkley saunters through the door. Of course Felix is here. I don't know why I didn't think of him as soon as I saw I was Candice.

“Do you know what the fuck this is about?” he says lazily, sitting down on the sofa, spreading his arms and legs wide.

I'm not ready yet. I need a moment to compose myself, but if I don't answer him soon, he's going to know something's up. I keep the scathing look on my face as I glance up and down.

“How the fuck should I know?” I reply, my tone laced with defiance. “Since when has anything made any sense in this place?”

A thought crosses my mind as I speak, so I add, “I thought Anthura would have told you?”

He shrugs, looking completely unbothered. “If she didn't tell you, I don't see why she would tell me.”

He can’t be serious. Every time I’ve seen him in the last few weeks, he’s been attached to Anthura’s side like a lost puppy. “Er, because you're sleeping with her?”

He stares at me. Damn, I should have kept my mouth shut. Even though it's been clear he's sleeping with Anthura from the start, I can't be sure. And even if I did know, would Candice know?

“Yeah, well, I'm not doing that anymore. I'm sick of the bitch. She's no help at all.”

This is interesting. Maybe this trial won't be so bad. If he's not sleeping with Anthura anymore, why not? I doubt very much he's sleeping with Noémi, not after the way he embarrassed himself with her. So, who else is he sleeping with? Because men like Felix Barkley don't spend their nights alone.

I don't know how to ask him this without being obvious, so I sit down and start looking at my nails–a mannerism that I think Candice did in the past...

“What's going on with you and Rowena, anyway?” I don't know why I asked, but I feel loyalty to my friend, and this might be my only chance to get him to treat her better.

He rakes his hands through his hair, and for the first time, I see some shaking in his fingers. “I don’t want to talk about her.” He stands and begins to pace the room. “Seriously. What’s this about?” He gestures around the room. Must be fucking boring to watch.”

I follow his movements as he paces like a caged lion in a zoo enclosure.

He rubs his cleanly shaven chin. “I didn't want to do it. She forced me.”

It takes me a few moments to realize he’s talking about Rowena still. I doubt he’d tell Candice about the kiss, so I can only assume he’s talking about the last trial. “Didn't look like it from where I was sitting,” I say in my own words before I can help myself. He doesn't seem to notice that I'm not talking like Candice; he's lost in his own world.

When he looks at me, his eyes are manic. “You must have felt it, too. I doubt very much you just sat there and took it. Remy might be a pussy, but even he wouldn't let you go through that much pain without putting you out of your misery.”

“That’s not what happened,” I say defensively.

Damn!

He scoffs. “I know the two of you are fucking, so don't try to tell me otherwise.” Pain pierces my chest, even though I know he doesn't know that for sure. He's just postulating, so he doesn't have to look at himself.

I try to sit like Candice, crossing my legs. “You don't know shit about me and Remy, but if you must know, he was a perfect gentleman in the first trial. He helped me, but when it came to me helping him, he kept himself to himself despite my offer.”

It's not just my legs that I've crossed; my fingers are both crossed behind my back. Felix turns, and for a second, I wonder if he's going to cross the room and hit me. He's certainly capable of it, and the madness in his eyes tells me that he's losing the plot.

“Whatever,” he finally says, “but you don't know what it’s like for a man.”

I roll my eyes. “So tell me,” I say. “What was it like, Felix Barkley?”

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