Page 36 of The Secret of Pain

I shower and dress for the first time in days, and that alone makes me feel a lot better. On my way down the stairs, I hear banging in the kitchen, followed by Bauer cussing. I guess he's trying to cook. It never was a skill of his. Of any of ours other than Mom really.

I laugh when I find him covered in what I'm assuming is egg, from the looks of it. The glass bowl lies on its side at his feet, the rest of the mixture pooling around him.

"Having fun?" I smirk, and he looks up and groans.

"Barrel of laughs. Can't you see this is my favorite thing?" he mutters as he bends down and picks up the bowl.

"How about I clean that up while you change, and we go out for breakfast? Molly's still does the best breakfast stack on this side of the world." I smile, and the one he gives me in return warms my heart. I haven't been that close to Bauer in recent years, but now with some of my memories back, I know that we weren’t always as distant as it’s felt lately. Sometimes, he's been like the other side of the same coin that is me.

"I'm glad to see you're feeling better, but yeah, that sounds great. We better check to see if the others want to come. If we go to Molly's without them, heads will roll." He laughs and heads upstairs to change while I clean the gloopy mess up.

Once it’s dealt with I pour myself a coffee and just enjoy feeling more like myself than I have in a while. The cloud of everything with Jack doesn't seem so dark and heavy anymore. Fates knows I've dealt with worse heartbreak than that. In this life, and in others. Even if I don't remember what they are, I can feel it. That this isn't going to break me. The weight of all things Hunter weighs down on me, but it also doesn't feel crippling, as if I know that my memories are coming back and I know I can deal with the burden it brings, like I have a dozen times before.

I smile into my coffee cup as Colt bounds into the kitchen with a huge grin. I guess it makes more sense to me now why my brothers never moved out of here. Safety in numbers, out in the middle of nowhere so should anything happen, no innocents get caught in the crossfire, but if they think I'm giving up my apartment, they can think again.

"You're back!" he says as he slides into the chair beside me. "And we're going to Molly's!"

"You're very excited for this time of day." I laugh.

"It's Molly's. Of course I'm excited! I've been gone a long time. There were no Molly's out there. I missed that place hard. I texted Creek, he's going to meet us there. I swear he was more excited about that than going on patrol last night," he says, shaking his head, before leaning forward and pulling something out of his back pocket. "Your keys. Your cat is a menace, but he's been fed, watered, let out, and let back in. I have the cuts to prove it. Little shit."

I laugh as he rolls up his sleeves, seeing the faint lines that are obviously from Sushi are almost healed.

"Big bad Hunter can't even take on my poor little pussy cat. How on earth do you survive out there?" I tease.

He shoves me gently and I laugh again as Bauer joins us. "Dad's not coming, he's working on something this morning, but asked us to bring him something back."

"Sounds good to me," I say, standing as my stomach growls.

"I call shotgun!" Colt shouts and bounds out of the house. I swear to all the fates, he has Peter Pan syndrome.

"I guess you're driving," I say to Bauer, since my car is still parked at home.

"Fine by me," he says with a grin. "Better than letting you drive."

"Hey! I am not a bad driver."

"Whatever you say!" He shakes his head as he chuckles, and I follow him out of the door.

* * *

Breakfast was amazing as ever, and being around those three as they gossiped away about this and that felt so natural, so right. They were talking about a night from about a hundred years ago, and I laughed with them as they told the story, right before it popped into my head. It is still the strangest sensation, but with each memory that comes back, I feel more myself. More confident in the decision I made. And yet, my heart still hurts, even though it’s been broken before. Being around everyone makes me feel like I'm home, but a part of me still misses Jack and the chance of a normal life. Still misses dancing and the pressures of my job.

Bauer dropped me off at home twenty minutes ago, and I've been pottering around, trying to figure out what to do with myself. I have so much weird nervous energy.

My phone rings, startling me from my ponderings. Creek’s face stares up at me from my phone and I smile.

"Hey, what's up? Miss me already?" I joke as I answer the phone.

"Hey, I was just deciding what to do for the day, and I wondered if you were up for a drive?" Creek’s gravely voice filters through the phone, and I tamper down the wistful fluttering of my heart. Not only is it way too soon since everything with Jack, but Creek is my friend, always has been, and that's it as far as I can remember. The last thing I want to do is ruin that.

"Sounds fun! Can we take my Mustang?" I plead. I miss driving her. The last time I did was when I picked them up from the airport.

"We could, except, where we're going might just kill her, so probably best to just take my truck." I can hear his smile in his words.

"Fine!" I concede. "How long ‘til you're here?"

"Well, I mean, I'm kinda downstairs already."

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