Page 73 of Magic and Medicine

‘I heard Sara is back in her apartment. No matter how strong we are, women always have the last word in these matters. She is remarkable, and I want you to know none of my people will touch her. I will ensure her safety. Wherever she goes, she will be safe. If I can offer you a little advice man-to-man, it would be to talk to her somewhere she feels strong, then apologise - even if you have done nothing wrong. Don’t let someone you care for walk out of your life,’ he said.

There was a quality to Nadolny’s advice that was more than platitudes, as if he had faced a similar situation and was still regretting his decision. So, instead of ignoring him, I stood and shook his hand, replying.

‘Thank you for the advice. I promise to give it serious consideration.’

After this conversation, business in Tricity slowly returned to normal. I spent every hour improving the lives of the elder races, merfolk included, each night talking to Adam, who was keeping a close eye on Nina and, by association, Sara.

I wasn’t the only one returning to their routine, as Sara seemed to throw herself into her work; the number of shifts she worked more than usual which made me concerned she was struggling. Only one thing was unusual: Sara returned to the dockyard hospital’s ruins and spent some time there. The guard who reported to Adam mentioned that when she walked out, she looked sad and asked him if the owners intended to open it again.

When I heard this, I grasped onto it like a drowning man holding a rope and instantly grabbed my phone.

‘Adam, I need the dockyard hospital open. Hire an architect to make it the best money can buy, and call in that favour with the Health Minister; I want the place licensed. Don’t tell Nina, but ask Damian or Rysiek for advice. I want it to be perfect,’ I said.

‘Nina will be happy. She said the four of them discussed working there. Making it a place where everybody would feel welcome, and beings of the Nether wouldn’t be afraid to visit.’

‘I don’t care about Nina…’ I started, but then it hit me, the realisation I could have a glimpse into my mate’s thoughts. ‘Adam, I shouldn’t ask, but… what else did she say?’

‘That Sara is sad and doesn’t know what to make of it. She thinks you were happy for her to be gone, especially since you’re enjoying single life and haven’t tried to contact her. Nina said Sara would never make the first move. She also told me that if you ever ask about Sara, I should tell you to shift your sorry arse and do something before she walks into your office to drag you out by the scruff of your neck.’

I was silent for a moment, letting the words sink in. Sara thinks I’m happy because I didn’t go to her? Was I wrong all this time? My thoughts were racing. I’d wanted to go to her so many times. Go to her, demand to be let in, then kiss her till she agreed to return home, but I was capable of learning from my mistakes and knew I couldn’t demand anything, so I’d given her time, waiting for the first glimmer of interest before I made my move.

‘I am not happy, I’m not enjoying my life, and you, out of everyone, should have told me about this sooner.’ I said, trying to keep a snarl out of my voice. Adam gave me a moment to calm down before he spoke. The mask of the playful rake slipped, revealing a concerned, caring face.

‘She is part of your soul. I wish I had someone like that, so don’t blow it, Boss.’

‘I thought you and Nina…’ I said, trying to divert my racing thoughts, and he grunted, a strange emotion in his voice.

‘It’s complicated.’

We finished our conversation, clearing any urgent business and ended the call, but I felt too unsettled to stay in the office and took the car to drive around the city. I knew Sara would be home by now, likely reading and relaxing with Scarface, two of her favourite pastimes. I smashed my hand on the steering wheel, cracking the wood veneer. Enough! That’s enough. I want to see you, even if it ends with the door slammed in my face; you’ll know I’m not enjoying life alone.

I turned sharply, the screech of tyres and horns ignored as I hit the accelerator, speeding toward her home. I briefly considered buying Sara some flowers and her favourite treats but decided against it. I didn’t want to pressure her to let me in, but I couldn’t prevent the desperation and longing from clawing at my guts. When I found myself looking at her front door, uncertainty freezing my feet to the spot, I reached up to stroke the protective symbol I had placed there so many weeks ago. She was mine. Even when I didn’t know her well, I’d felt it. The bond that whispered to my soul. I knocked hesitantly.

‘Oh, just come in, and I hope you brought pizza. I’m hungry.’ When I heard her voice, so inviting and casual, anger flared inside me. She was waiting for someone who could just walk in, and it wasn’t me. I knew Nina was working, as Adam had been very vocal about it. Someone else was due to visit her this late in the evening.

I pushed on the handle and entered. The view took my breath away. Sara was more beautiful than ever, her blonde hair almost glowing with health, and as I imagined, she sat in her chair, book on her lap and cat curled beside her.

‘I don’t have pizza, and whoever you are waiting for can go fuck themselves because you and I have to talk.’ I said more angrily than I intended to. Her head snapped toward me, and the book tumbled on the floor when she gracefully rose from her armchair. In a few brief steps, I was beside her. She was dressed in simple house clothes, dark leggings and an oversized T-shirt, but for me, she looked stunning, and it hurt even more to think she’d moved on.

‘I missed you. Whatever you heard, I was not enjoying myself. Please tell me you are not seeing someone else? Let me explain first before you give up on us.’

‘I’m not seeing anyone, you jealous freak.’

‘But the invitation and pizza? Who were you waiting for?’

‘Me,’ answered the burly figure in the door. I recognised the man as one of Sara’s friends. Kris, the firefighter. He casually strolled to her kitchen, leaving a large box on the table before he headed to the doors. ‘About bloody time, mate. I was going to drag you here myself,’ he said, leaving her apartment, and I stared after him, wondering if everyone had an opinion on my lack of action.

‘I’m sorry. Please let me explain. It’s been torture without you, and I can’t do it any longer. I know you need space to think, but can we talk?’ I lifted my hand to stroke her cheek but pulled it back, desperately fighting my desire to hold her.

Sara smiled, biting her lip when my hand fell to my side, then moved closer. My heart stuttered as hope flooded my soul, and I closed my eyes, unable to watch. When the gentle touch of her fingers caressed my beard, I moaned, almost missing her question.

‘Would you like some coffee?’

Chapter thirty-five

I settled into my chair and tried to read as I waited for Kris to arrive, with Scarface dutifully curled up beside me, but I couldn’t focus on my book; the story of two star-crossed lovers was not suitable for my current state of mind. I missed Leszek and his touch, even his occasionally overbearing manner. I missed the man who looked at me like nothing else mattered.

My sigh was deep as once more I mulled over my feelings for the impossible Forest Lord, wondering if these feelings of love and loss were nothing more than infatuation and regret. As usual, whenever I thought about my Wolfie, it reminded me of the changes that he’d made to my life, not just my feelings, but the whole living for eternity thing.

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