Page 80 of Revolt

“He’s right, you know,” Astro murmurs, and I see a flash of red on his neck. Frowning, I tug at his collar to move it out of the way. He ducks, avoiding my touch, and I sit back.

“What is that?” I ask. “Are you hiding a hickey from me?”

“It’s nothing.” Astro lowers his head, and I tilt mine, watching him.

“She asked you a question,” Dal says.

“It’s nothing,” Astro replies, looking around, his face turning even redder.

“Astro?” Raffiel prompts. All eyes are on him.

He turns to look at me and then sighs. “I’m not trying to hide anything from you, I promise. It’s just something I wanted to show you alone.” Still blushing, he tugs his shirt aside and my eyes widen, unsure what I’m seeing. On his shoulder, at the base of his neck, is a red lipstick mark, and for a moment, jealousy and pain hit me. He must see it in my gaze because he reaches for my hand, and when I tug it away, he kicks my chair back and presses his legs on either side of me, gripping my chin. “Look at it.”

“Stop it. Why are you being cruel?” I snap, trying to tug myself away.

“Reign, look at it,” he orders. I feel the others looking, but they are relaxed, as if noticing something I don’t.

“Um, next course,” a waiter says hesitantly.

“Not now,” Astro snaps at the waiter without even looking. “Look at me, Reign. This is yours.” He takes my hand and covers it. “One of the first days I met you, you kissed my throat better. Remember? That very same day, I got it tattooed.”

Realization strikes me as I stroke the still healing tattoo, remembering exactly what he’s talking about. It’s even the same shade of lipstick. He got my kiss tattooed. My eyes meet his, searching them for answers—answers I’m not sure I’m ready for but probably need.

“Why?” I ask, peering into his eyes.

“You know why,” he murmurs.

“Why?” I demand, my heart pounding.

“Because I knew from the moment I laid eyes on you what you would become to me.” He covers my hand, smiling softly. “I know you’re not ready for that, and I know you’re still healing from the man who came before us, but I would never hurt you, Reign. I would never betray you. I’m all in, okay? All of us are. You never have to worry about that, and when you’re ready, we’ll be waiting. Until then, this is for me.” He kisses my hand and then guides me back to the table. “Now let’s enjoy our next course.”

Swallowing, I stare at the plate that appears in front of me, barely paying attention to what I eat. I feel their eyes on me, but I’m unable to meet them, too busy working through my emotions. There’s worry, as well as the need to run far and fast from something so serious, since my commitment issues are raising their ugly heads, but below it all is . . . glee.

He cares so much that he tattooed my kiss on his neck.

When have I ever felt such dedication and love from another person? I was with Tucker for years, and even moving in together was a carefully thought-out decision. It’s not like that with them. It’s real and almost feels like it was meant to be.

If I were a person who believed in destiny, I might even say these men were destined to be mine, which means I have a decision I need to make because Astro just admitted they are all in. I need to decide if I want that or want out, and now, before they get hurt. As I play with my food, my eyes go to them, and I realize I’m all in with them.

I want this. I want them.

Even if it terrifies me, I want what I see in their eyes. I want lazy mornings filled with laughter, I want to spend every night with them in my bed, and I want their comforting arms around me as I write my music. I want their strengths, and I want their pain. Wherever this takes us, I’m in.

“Okay,” I say, knowing they are waiting.

“Okay?” Astro turns to me.

“Okay.” I smile. “I’m in.”

The grin he gives me makes it worthwhile, and I giggle as they all whoop. I know I made the right decision.

* * *

There are several courses but luckily, the portions they present are small so I don’t get too full too early. I enjoy it, though, and they regale me with stories of their time together overseas. They make me laugh until it hurts. “I can’t believe you actually let him get away with that, Raff!” I chuckle and glance up to get Raff’s reaction to a story Cillian is telling, but my smile disappears when I notice he isn’t paying attention. He’s looking at his lap, and I realize he’s on his phone, completely oblivious. Shaking it off, I smile and turn back to Cillian, listening to him weave the tale.

When they all laugh, I turn once more to Raff to find him still on his phone. Frowning, I sip my wine. “So, Raff, what about you?”

“Hmm?” he replies distractedly.

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