Page 59 of Surviving Lies

His head hung next to mine as his breathing slowed against my cheek.

“This didn’t go exactly as I’d planned,” he said into my ear. He started pushing up on his elbow and against the side of the couch as he looked down at me. “I’m sorry; it must be work.”

“It’s OK,” I said. But I was a bit confused, considering he told me he stopped working to come back to school. But I guess once you work in a family business, you can never leave it behind.

He continued to get off of the couch, the message that our time together was over coming through.

“My bathroom is in the same place as yours.” His eyes gestured down the short hall toward the stairs. I got up and gathered my clothes, suddenly uncomfortable with the mood in the room and between us.

I closed the door just before the first tear fell. Sliding along the back of the door, I buried my face in my hands to hide my sobs. There was no way I could let Gage know I was upset. Caring was not part of our deal. Our deal was only sex.

So why did I care it seemed like thiswasonly sex?

I finally got up and got my clothes on. After splashing some water on my face, I looked in the mirror. Swollen eyes stared back at me, but I felt I looked presentable enough to head back out. Walking into the living room, I found it empty. Then I heard hushed voices coming from the kitchen. I leaned against the back of the couch, not sure what my next move should be.

After a couple minutes of standing there, completely alone, I reached for my keys on the sofa table. Gage must have heard me, and he peeked his head around the kitchen doorway.

“Hey,” he said, covering the phone with his hand. “Sorry, I’ve got to finish this. I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”

There was a hint of an apology in his eyes. But nothing more.

“Yeah, sure.”

And I left.

I left and walked home because he forgot he had picked me up.

It wasn’t a far walk, but that wasn’t the point. And the entire walk home, I kept thinking I’d hear the familiar roar of the Mustang engine slide up next to me.

But I didn’t.

The sun had already set, twilight even close to over, as I pushed the door to my apartment open. The first floor was empty of noise and people, which made my heart feel even heavier. Though I knew if anyone had been around, I wouldn’t have wanted to see them or talk. My emotions were all over the place. I didn’t know what I was feeling as I stood frozen in the small foyer.

Finally, I decided being alone in my room was my best option. I made the hard right turn to head up the stairs when I heard footsteps come from above.

“Becca?” a voice called out. It sounded like Lanie.

“Yeah, it’s me,” I responded.

She came bounding down the stairs, excitement all over her face and in her movements. She grabbed a hold of my hand and dragged me toward the kitchen.

“Lane, I just want to head upstairs,” I whined, pulling back on her arm to get out of her grasp.

“Uh-uh, not so fast. You, my dear, have to see what came for you,” she said in a sing-songy voice. “You got a delivery.” She pulled me along into the dark kitchen, then blinded me as she flipped the switch.

Once my eyes adjusted to the bright light, I focused on the bouquet of roses on the island.

A dozen roses, mixed pastel colors, in a vase. But they were also filled in with greenery and baby’s breath to make an arrangement that took up half our counter. They were stunning. More than stunning.

“Who do you think they’re from?” Lanie asked. “Do you think you know?”

She had no idea I was just with Gage. I’m sure she probably thought they were from him. And I would have as well, under different circumstances.

“Yeah, I know.”

My melancholy demeanor came through in my voice, I guess.

“OK, Bec. Well, I’ll leave you to it. There’s a note with them. Love ya, hon.” And she left me alone.

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