Page 88 of Surviving Lies

She leaned into my side as she looked over toward Xander. “I’m not as much of a mess as I thought I would be. I’m in a different place than I was last year. He’s helped put me there. I just hope I can stay there, ya know?” Her voice held something that told me she didn’t trust herself to stay strong. But I did. She had come such a long way; she would not let herself go back to the way she was when she came to school. Neither would Becca nor Xander. Especially Xander. It was his life’s mission to keep her safe and make her world a perfect place for them to live in.

I aspired to be like him. I wanted to make a world that was perfect for Becca and me. Where she could once again trust me. Love me.

I only hoped she’d give me the chance to try.

“I have faith in you, Lanie. In you, and him, to keep you both exactly where you need to be. Xander won’t let anything happen to you.” She nodded into my chest as Xander came walking back toward us.

“The only thing Bryce could tell me is that he is out and wearing a house arrest anklet, so they’re able to monitor him,” Xander said as he enveloped Lanie with his arms. He extended one hand over her head to me and I gripped it, shaking it hard. “I’m sorry again, Ty. Really am.”

“It’s fine, man. I would have done the same thing.” I started walking away, toward my car, to make my exit. “I’m going to leave you guys to it. I’m assuming you have a lot to talk about. Keep me informed, and let me know what’s going on if I can do anything, OK?”

And that was when Lanie looked at me withthatlook. The look that told me we were about to change the subject. I figured with the recent events, there would be notalkwith us, which I was OK with, to be honest.

But Lanie’s hand landed on my arm as I was stepping away from them.

“Hey, Ty,” she said. “We can still talk tomorrow.” Her blue eyes were soft and sincere as she looked right into mine. “If I’ve learned anything from my past, it’s that my life has to go on. I can’t let Max stop me from living.” She looked over at Xander. I wasn’t so sure he agreed with her, but she kept talking. “Come to Xander’s tomorrow. That’s where I’ll be staying for a while. We can talk there. I still want to help you. Help you and Becca.” I nodded. Me agreeing to see her sent a wave of nausea through me.

I would have to tell her everything tomorrow.

The nausea hadn’t passed as I knocked on Xander’s front door. I barely slept, tossing and turning as I thought about the best way to explain the past year and a half of my life. My only consolation was that Lanie and Xander were two very level-headed people. Telling them first would hopefully give me some guidance on how to approach Becca.

“Hey, Ty,” Xander said as he opened the door. He stood in front of me in a pair of shorts and nothing else. He was an intimidating figure with his wing-tattooed chest as he loomed over me. I was tall, but he had me by about two inches and twenty pounds. And a shit ton more muscle.

Yeah, I’d be scared of him in a dark alley.

“Hey, Xander.” I followed behind him into a, thankfully, quiet apartment. And considering he lived with three other of our frat brothers, the place was surprisingly clean. It was pretty plain, only some beer posters on the wall. But the place wasn’t littered with empty bottles and dirty dishes everywhere, like mine was.

The drink caddy shook in my hands as we walked toward the living room, evidence I was more nervous than I’d realized. The creamer pods and sugar packets stuffed in next to the hot drinks were at risk of toppling over as we walked. I needed to hold it against my body to steady it all as we found Lanie on the couch, watching a show on TV with the volume down low. She muted it as we approached and sat up with a smile for me.

“I brought you a tea, Lane,” I said, handing her the cup. I put the holder on the table in front of the couch, which held the two remaining coffees. “Didn’t know how you took your coffee, Xander. I have everything there to make it up the way you need.”

“Thanks, Ty,” Lanie said as she blew into the opened container to cool off the hot liquid. “That was so nice of you.”

Xander was making up a cup of coffee as I stood wringing my hands, too nervous to drink mine. Once he was finished, he started making his way out of the room.

“I’ll leave you guys to it. I’ll be upstairs,” Xander said.

“Hey, I was kind of hoping to talk to both of you, if you don’t mind,” I said.

He looked surprised but pleased when I said that. He backpedaled into the room and took a seat next to Lanie, pulling her onto his lap. “Of course, but I don’t know what’s going on. Lanie was a good friend and kept it to herself.”

I smiled at Lanie in appreciation but wasn’t the least bit surprised. That was just who Lanie was. I sat in a chair across from them and tried to prepare myself for what I was about to do. Sweat built up on my brow and my hands. I wiped them across my thighs, hoping my jeans wouldn’t discolor much.

I knew I needed to just blurt it out.

“I have a kid. I have a baby.”

Lanie remained calm with no reaction. But Xander flinched under her, and his surprise was obvious.

“I know. Becca told me,” Lanie said.

I guess that shouldn’t have surprised me. They would have talked once Becca got back yesterday. She would have been nonstop about what she saw all night long, I’m sure.

“How did you not tell me that?” Xander asked her incredulously. She pushed his hand off of hers and turned her attention back to me.

“Ty, I think there’s a bit more that needs to be said, though, right? I mean, I have to believe that you weren’t cheating on Becca. I need to believe you weren’t cheating on Becca. Please tell me you weren’t cheating on Becca.” Lanie sat forward, removing herself from Xander’s arms, her brow furrowed as she stared back at me.

“I never cheated on Becca, Lanie. Never. I never would have. She’s my one,” I said. “She’s how you are to Xander. She’s everything to me. There’s no one else for me.”

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