Page 10 of Dark Knight

His head shakes, and an amused grin crosses his face as his eyes pierce through me. “Because I want to take you home. I want to keep you. And I for damn sure never want any of those vipers near you again.”

I’m not entirely certain how to take his statement, so I don’t say anything. Nolan is unlike anyone I’ve ever known before. He’s intense but funny, honest but kind—to me, anyway— and he looks at me with a secret only he knows the answers to. And when he kisses me, I forget everything. All the pain of my past, the questionable things I endure. He makes me think I deserve more.

But I don’t.

I never will.

It’s been drummed into me for as long as I can remember that I’m worthless. A burden. Unwanted. An afternoon of frivolity isn’t going to change my perception on how my life is. I wish it could, but I know it won’t.

“Hey.” He snaps his fingers in front of my face, a frown marring his stoic features. “Where’d you go just now?”

“Just wondering what your life is like away from here,” I lie, hoping I have a curious expression on my face and not the doubt I feel.

His eyes narrow as he assesses my response, clearly not believing me but not calling me on it either. “Boring,” he finally answers, and I get the feeling it’s anything but that.

“Hey, Uncle Nolan, can we go make burgers now?” Sawyer interrupts, and we’re both dragged back to reality.

“Yeah, kid.” Nolan ruffles the dark mop of hair on the boy's head. “Grub it is, but you’re cooking.” The dumbfounded look on Sawyer’s face makes me laugh. It’s a mix of horror and excitement.

“I think Mom might be mad about that.”

Nolan nods his head as he reaches back for my hand, entwining our fingers and walking us all back. “You’re probably right about that. She’d likely filet my balls into minced meat.”

“I dunno what that means, but it doesn’t sound good,” Sawyer mutters as he runs ahead, leaving us to walk in silence.

It’s not uncomfortable, but there’s a lot hanging in the air between us, and I’m the clueless one who doesn’t understand what any of it means.

Per usual.

* * *

Nolan

“You sure about this, Nol?” Holden’s voice on the other end of this call isn’t as hesitant as his question.

“Positive.” I didn’t believe it was possible. Not in my life. But the more time I spend with Bea, the more I realize I can’t live without her.

I was never a sucker for the whole insta-love bullshit everyone seemed to be harping on, but the second I saw her, I knew she would change my life. And the more I've gotten to know her, the more certain I am.

“If you get caught, you know you’re going to prison, right? Hell, so will I. Noelle will kill us both.” Hold grumbles, but I hear him typing away, and I can only imagine him in the dark of the living room, his pregnant wife upstairs in bed asleep as he rushes through what he needs so he can get back to her.

I want that.

I didn’t realize I did until I spent more and more time at their house these past few months. Usually, to hang out and game with Sawyer. The kid's a genius inCall of Duty.

Doesn’t mean I didn’t watch my best friend and his wife when they weren’t looking. I could never identifywhyuntil this weekend.

Envy.

Jealousy.

Desire to replicate their life for myself.

I’m not a good man, never tried to be. I’ve killed, stolen, sold drugs, and until a year ago, I ran a brothel; now, it’s turned into a gentleman’s club. I have no illusions that any woman I call my own will be a target of anyone who dislikes me.

Bea is worth the risk, though, because I know there is nothing I won’t do to keep her safe and happy. If that means building a fortress to keep her hidden from the world, I’ll do it happily with my bare fucking hands.

“This is going to take a while, man. I’ll have it ready for you when you get here in the morning.” The pregnant pause is telling before he finally says, “It’d go faster if we roped in Daniel.”

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