Page 171 of The Consequences of Love and Vengeance

“It’s not DNA that makes a person a parent, Bri. It’s not giving birth or holding your child when they’re only seconds old that makes a parent either. It’s here.” He stabs his chest with his pointer finger. “And it’s here.” He does the same, jabbing his finger into his temple. “Being a parent is about loving someone without conditions. It’s about not only wanting but also needing to be in that child’s life; doing anything and everything to make sure they are safe and happy. It’s a form of true love in a way, because there is no love that compares to that of a parent.”

His words penetrate, but there is still doubt that continues to linger in my head. Gabriel isn’t mine. He’s Drago’s. His father should want him. Need him. It doesn’t matter the reason or how he came into this world. He’s here. He is D’s son. Not mine and I hate that. I shouldn’t resent the fact that he has a real mother, no matter how much of a piece of shit she is. Gabe is hers too.

“She isn’t his real mother,” he says as if hearing my thoughts.

“Maybe not,” I concede, then down my drink, needing the hot liquid to coat my throat to keep the tears locked away. I’m sick of the tears. I’m sick of crying over what I’ve lost: Drago, Gabriel, my baby.

Life fucking sucks right now, and I don’t know how I got here.

“My dad isn’t my biological father.”

I snap out of my choking thoughts.

“What?” I remember my thought yesterday when Justin revealed the DEA director is Eric’s dad. Does that mean he’s adopted then?

“My dad, the man I love and look up to the most in this world is not the man that took part in creating me. Doesn’t mean he isn’t my father. He is, and there is no one that will ever take his place. He molded me into the man I am today. He loves my mother so fiercely that I wonder if it’s even possible to find the kind of love they have. Looking at them and knowing the fucked-up shit that happens day in and day out, it doesn’t seem like a possibility. I love my dad even more simply for how he loves my mother and me. So, what I’m saying is you are that boy’s mother whether you believe it or not. You love him like no other person does, and that makes you his mom.”

Does it? Does it really?

I’ve never admitted to wanting him out loud. I can’t want him, because when we do find him, Drago and I won’t be together. What good is wanting something I can’t have?

“Hey!” We both pop our heads up, seeing Connie stop in front of our booth. After a beat of silence, she cocks her head to the side, eyeing down at me. “You going to scoot over and let me sit or not?”

I slide over and she lowers down, taking a seat next to me and in front of Eric.

“What are you doing here?” I ask suspiciously.

She smiles, widening her mouth into a grin at Eric before placing her forearms on the table and turning her head to face me. Her smile instantly turns into a scowl.

“I hate the douche-prick the chief assigned to me. I had to get out of the office. I knew you were here.”

“How?” I question and then realize my stupidity.

“How do you think? Duh!” She grips her cell phone, flashing it at me. “We are still sharing our location like good partners.”

Connie and I met in the academy, but we didn’t become close until we were both promoted to detective and assigned to the same precinct two years ago. We decided it was in both of our best interests to continuously share our location with each other using our cellular devices. That way if something happened or we couldn’t reach each other, we’d know where to look.

Turning her head, she looks back at Eric.

“So, pretty boy, how do I get in on this DEA thing Bri has going on? She and I are a package deal.”

I almost snort my coffee. Just yesterday she was name-calling them, and now she wants to be one. Yeah, right!

That transferred detective must be a piece of work if she can’t deal with him.

“That bad, huh?”

She throws her head back against the cushioned headrest.

“You have no idea.”

Connie usually isn’t this dramatic. Leaning forward, her blonde hair skims over the table and her eyes land back on Eric. He’s observing her, yet he’s keeping his expression neutral.

I know he’s her type, but is she his?

Suddenly, I feel like the third wheel even though I’m the one that’s supposed to be here with Eric discussing our next move if Chasity doesn’t make an appearance.

I’m getting tired of no action. Day by day my hope wanes.

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