Page 33 of The Girl I Once Loved

Daisy's voice breaks through my reverie. "Skylar, you look absolutely stunning!"

Our mother joins in, her voice filled with pride. "That dress suits you so well, dear. You're radiant in it."

Their words warm my heart, and I force a smile in response. I don't want to dampen Daisy's excitement or overshadow her joy with my own insecurities. Today is about her, and I'm here to support her in every way I can.

But as I stand there in the bridal gown, I can't help but confront my own doubts and regrets. It's been seven years since I left Thatcher's Bay, leaving behind not only my dreams but also the people I loved. The ache in my heart is a reminder of all the choices I've made and the paths I've taken.

Gael’s face fills my head.

He’d give me the wedding of my dreams in this dress…he’d even try his best to give me a happily ever after. If only I would fully embrace the love he offers.

The problem is…that as I stare at myself in this gown, I'm reminded of…Noah.

And Gael doesn’t deserve that.

As I stand here, caught between the past and the present, I wonder if I'll ever find the courage to fully embrace the love Gael offers me. I know I can't keep living in the past, but letting go of those memories is easier said than done.

As we drive home, with the lazy sea breeze brushing over my skin through the open window, I can't help but let myself drift into a daydream, one I'd had countless times in high school with Noah.

I'm standing on the shores of Thatcher's Bay, the waves gently lapping at my feet. The sun is setting on the horizon, casting a warm, golden glow over everything. I'm wearing a flowing white gown, the fabric billowing in the breeze. My hair is loose and tousled, adorned with delicate wildflowers.

And waiting for me at the end of a makeshift aisle, his eyes filled with love and longing, is Noah. He's dressed in a simple suit, his light hair ruffled by the wind. The sight of him takes my breath away, just as it did all those years ago when we were young and foolish and in love.

As I walk toward him, each step filled with anticipation, my heart flutters in my chest. Noah's gaze never wavers from mine, and I can see the depth of his feelings in his eyes. The world around us fades away, and it's just the two of us, lost in this moment of pure, unadulterated love.

Just as our hands touch, and my mouth opens to say my vows…I'm jolted back to reality.

I'm not on a picturesque beach.

And Noah is not waiting for me.

The distance between us is not just physical but emotional, too great to bridge to attempt to cross.

I open my eyes and take a deep breath, banishing the fantasy from my mind. The ache in my chest remains, a reminder of the love I once had and the choices I had to make. I know that Noah is a part of my past, a chapter that can never be rewritten.

But my heart doesn’t seem to get the message.

Chapter Eight

Skylar

An incoming text wakes me up from my restless sleep the next morning.

Since I’ve been home and back in this room, it’s fair to say that a good night’s sleep just isn’t in the cards for me. Not when memories of every little thing that transpired on this very bed insist on keeping me alarmingly awake for most of the night, haunting me at every turn.

Needing a distraction from my current predicament, I stretch out my arm to pick up my phone on the nightstand, hoping it’s my boss with a new assignment for me to keep me busy, only to feel a pang to my chest when I find that the text came from Gael.

I stare apprehensively at his simple three-worded text, asking how I’m doing, in the same way most authors tremble at the sight of an empty page. I’m at a complete loss for words as to what to reply, which is ironic since words are supposed to be my bread and butter.

What should I do?

Do I give him the usual non-committal response of telling him that I’m fine, or should I be honest for once and tell him the truth? That since I left Boston, I’ve reverted to being a hot mess of a woman, and that my predictable easy-going day to day life is now infused with such chaotic confusion, that I’m no longer able to distinguish up from down anymore. But I know Gael.

If I go with the truth, then he’ll want more of it, and I’m not in the right frame of mind to have that difficult conversation with him yet—if ever. Hence why I’m not surprised that in the end, I chicken out, and give him the bland reply of I’m good.

When he quickly messages me back to say he misses me, I have to curb my knee jerk reaction of asking why.

How can he miss someone who never truly existed?

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